Broken Home, Broken Hearts

Chapter 15

Jamie

I woke up barfing all over the place. Exactly who's place? I ran into the bathroom throwing up in the toilet.

"We've all been there before "

I jumped to turn around and see Roberto half naked leaning on the door frame.

"Wh-what happened" I said, clutching my stomach.

"We had a few drinks....things got pretty wild." he smirked. Oh my god. We couldn't have.....no matter how buzzed I was I would've remembered my first time. He seen the alarm on my face and held his hands up.

"Look Jamie I would never take advantage of you like that. We made out....you gave me a lap dance strip show."

I hurled some more.

"Man.....is that how disgusted you are with me" he joked. Nothing was funny to me. After 3 months of being sober I just ruined it. I told Roberto I couldn't drink, but I think he might have slipped something pass me. I seen a bright flash.

"You asshole" I sat up. Did he really just take a picture? Speaking of asshole...I need to be getting back to my boyfriend. He's probably worried sick, then again I need to go clean myself up.

"I'm sorry,but a hungover Jamie Sanders is priceless. Want me to take you home, or do you want to chill with me."

"Home. please."

"Okie dokie." I got up from the ground and Roberto tossed me my shirt and jeans, grabbing his keys on the way out.
The drive to my house was quiet and awkward. He pulled up into the drive way. I started to open the door until he put his hand on my knee. I looked at him.

"Jamie..." he said pleadingly. Every since our second encounter at the dance studio he's been trying to convince me that we should be together. Other than that he's great company to be around. I smiled at him and he smiled back, not a teeth out of place. He closed his eyes and leaned towards me.

"Yeah....bye Roberto" I playfully shoved his face back and he laughed. I smiled as he backed out the drive way. I was terrified of what might come next. My dad stood in the door way glaring at me. A glare of pure hatred. Jasper had asked me to spend the weekend with him, so I did....and didn't tell him. He snatched me inside and threw me on to the floor.

"Where have you been boy?" He growled at me. I remained silent. I'm tired of answering to him. I deserve better than this. It wasn't my fault.

"Answer me dammit!!!!" He yelled. I got up dusting myself off and attempted to head to my room before being yanked back by my hair.

"Owww," I yelled.

"Answer your father!!!" His hand squeezed around my throat.

"You'll never leave this house again!!! I swear it boy!!!! Talk!!" His tone was much harsher it made me jump a little.

"I-I went to stay at Jasper-" He took his free hand and slapped me in the face.

"That punk again. I thought I told you to bring your ass home right after school." He let me go and I gasped for air.

"He's my boyfriend, I have to see him."

"No the hell you don't. When I tell you to do something you do it!!!"

"You can't keep trying to control my life!!! Why can't I be happy for once?!! Why do you want me to suffer!!!?" I shouted pushing him back "I didn't kill them!!!! I woke up chained to a damn hospital bed!!!!! I was in a comma for a year. I need you and you was never their for me!!!! You didn't even come for my release!!! You told Alex I was dead and he killed himself!!! You told him I'd never wake up!!! And when I did you didn't care!!!!" I screamed pushing him so hard he fell over the stool hitting his head on the side of the couch. "I tortured my self because you put these delusional thoughts in my head!!! I'm all you have left!!! I finally have someone to love me again!!! You don't! His family loves me!!!! I love all of them!!!! They hate you Bart!!!! They would rather see you in a damn coffin!!! I'm all you have! If you think for one second that I need you, your wrong!!!! No one loves you but me old man!!! That's the reason I'm not dead myself!!! I love you dad, all I wanted was your approval!!!! All those trophies were for you!!! Was for making up for me being gay!!! I wanted to show you I could still be a man!!!! I played every sport in the game!!!!! I've broken every limb I had and you never came to a single game!!!!!" I fell to the floor and I started to shake trying to hold back the tears. I don't know what's happening. Am I on fire?

"Jamie?"

I tried to open my mouth but I couldnt.

"Jamie!!!!!!!!"

I couldn't stop shaking, I couldn't breathe. I clawed at my throat. I felt a sharp pain in my arm and my vision started to fade.

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I opened my eyes and found myself embraced in my fathers arms. I looked up to see tears stained on his cheeks.

"I thought I was about to loose you again Jamie. Every thing you said was right. You are all I have. I'm sorry I've been a shitty father. I l-l-love you son. You don't need my approval. Does this always happen?" My dad for once since the accident voice so full of care and concern.

"Yes...but your never around. Reba....she helps me. Jasper and his fathers help me to. I can't control it sometimes...." I looked down.

"I'm so sorry." he hugged me and I hugged him back. This was all I ever wanted. My fathers attention, some kind of affection towards me.

"I forgive you." I got up rubbing the part of my arm where the needle penetrated my skin.

"Jamie, do you truly love that boy?"

"Yes, with all my heart."

"Okay son." he kissed my forehead.
"I'm not going to loose you twice....I promise"

"Why do hit me?" I blurted out and quickly covered my mouth. The room was dead silence for what felt like forever before he broke the silence, clearing his throat.

"You should get some rest...." He laid me down and pulled the cover over me, taking another glance at me before leaving the room.

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