The Captain ( Book 1)

Chapter 17

When James left I went to find Erick. I need to talk to him about what happened with are parents and...everything else. Plus i'm starving and I need to eat. Even though I tried to put everything out of my head and I mean everything, it still wasn't working! Today, I had the feeling someone was watching me. I still feel it. It doesn't help that every one here stares at me or at least tries but then stops automatically when I send a glance there way.

I want them to stop looking at me like I need to be studied. Wherever I go I hear my name being whispered. One time Courtney had to walk over to a group of girls and confront them for me. I am very shy around people I don't know. Whenever somebody called me Courtney I would be to scared to correct them.

I find Erick finally after wandering the halls for what felt like forever. He is sitting in a chair reading a book like every night. The sun is starting to go down but I don't think he cares. Its funny, we are in a totally new  environment and he still chooses to act, well like him. Part of me expected him to go crazy or something. I never could have imagined him being so casual in this place. I can already feel myself changing into agonist different. Even though I got here a week or so ago I'm not the same girl who came here. I feel stronger, emotionally any ways. I am not a very strong person...

I walk right over to were he is sitting and I pull up a chair right next to him. He looks up from his book. He had a concerned look on his face. I usually don't talk to him alone unless something is wrong. I just wish people would stop looking at me like that. I don't want to be someone they pity.

"Hey," he says as he puts the book down.

"Hey"

That concerned look grows even deeper now. I love him for that, but sometimes I don't want to talk about it. Sometimes I wish he could just not talk, just listen. Well, that's all that is, it's only a wish, and in my experience they never come true.

"How you holding up?"

"About what?" I ask. I don't even think there is a point in asking since he knows everything already.

"About everything that has happened."

I know that he is not just talking about are parents showing up.

"I'm okay, better than I thought I would be after that."

"If I would have known that it was to that place I would have never let you come!"

"I know Erick. Thank you by the way, if it wasn't for you I would probably be back with those horrible people."

He smiled. " I know that was pretty upsetting but I don't think that was what you came here to talk to me about."

I start to play with my hands. He knows me so well. I sometimes think he knows whats wrong before it even happens. "how did you know?"

"Well I saw the way you looked at him. Then I saw the way you looked at him after....well you know. Then you two were missing last night."

"Yeah...."

"Alice, are you okay."

My eyes start to water again just at the thought of it. "umm." I try to smile but it doesn't work,"no."There was an awkward silence before I spoke again,"I forgave him but I haven't forgiven myself for forgiving him."

I put my head in my hands. Thinking how to phrase what I'm about to say,"I trusted him. I barely knew him but for some crazy reason I trusted him. You know I don't trust that many people, and then I saw him killing......."

"You know why he did right?"

"Yeah, but how did you know?I was with him all night."

His eyes widened but it actually made me smile.