dear jaehyun ii

"by any chance.."

father and i left the hospital after a dreadful thirteen months. he ushered me to his car carefully. while walking back, that boy's words constantly lingered in my mind. i kept thinking about him, and his words. i just couldn't help it. jaehyun, if i got his name right. do i know this person? or more like, who on earth is he?

"appa, do you happen to know if i had a friend named jung jaehyun, by any chance before the accident?"

"the boy we met last month, jung jaehyun? i'm sorry, love. i can't recall. i was really busy with work, that i didn't pay attention to you at all. if only i knew your sister treated you this way, i .."

"appa, please don't this to yourself. it's not your fault, okay? please, don't blame yourself,"

i grabbed father's hand while wiping the tears from his eyes slowly.

"let's just hope that eunji repents when she's back, okay?" i added on with a broken smile.

things had happened, my fate already written in pen and paper. there is nothing else i can do now, other than standing up for myself.

can i trust jaehyun in helping me out?

as father drove back to gangnam, i wind down the windows and stuck my head out. indeed, the car accident caused me post-traumatic stress disorder (ptsd). but, i have father by my side. he makes me feel safe, and comfortable.

"so appa, tell me. what did you do throughout the past year?" i broke the silence, and cleared the negative air in the car.

"nothing much, mainly visiting you in the hospital and your sister in prison. honestly, i was heartbroken after i learn that eunji treated you that way. i really felt guilty," father sighed.

"appa, it's fine. don't worry. but, can you do me a favour?" i asked softly.

"yes, my daughter?"

"can you help me to regain back my memories? it honestly sucks to lose them overnight. part of us are gone in my memory. appa, i'm sorry," i told him.

father turned to me at smiled, "of course, take all the time that you need,"

"i'm also thinking about dropping out of school, and be homeschooled instead. i don't think i can catch up with studies at this rate," i requested.

"jung jiwoo! you just got out of the hospital barely and hour ago, and you're talking about school. i understand you, but please. take the time to recover first. i can always come up with other arrangements," father pouted as he scolded me.

"yes, appa. thank you!" i replied.

soon, we arrived home, and were greeted by my step-mother and my helper. both of them tightly embraced me upon my arrival with tears in their eyes. my memory of them may not be distinct, but at least i know that they can help me get through this.

"welcome back, jiwoo-ah. why not you go to your room first. miss yoon will fix us dinner. here, let's go to your room" my step-mother said while reaching out for my hand.

i took her hand and she led me upstairs to my room, while hearing her lamenting about how her daughter treated me.

"we're here! take your time to see the things around, okay? i'll call you when dinner's ready," she gave me one last hug and left.

i closed the door and laid on my bed. it feels familiar. less than two seconds later, i jolted up and toured my own room which was long forgotten. the study decorated with grey dust and flakes. i bet none of them entered here when i wasn't around. i headed to the cork board to see polaroid pictures planted. maybe this would help.

i cautiously took down the board and flicked the dust away while walking to my bed at the same time. i began scanning the polaroids one by one, until one caught my eye.

isn't that me, and jaehyun ..?