Falling To The Sun | B. Swan + E. Cullen

soixante-sept

They exit the water further down the shore, stepping out near Clearwater and passing around the Quinault reservation to until the made it to Portland where they planned to head straight to the nearest airport to where they were going to catch the next flight to Brazil no matter how convoluted and backward it might be. 

Romulus had been changed the moment they stepped from the water, Alice buzzing around and spinning the clothes so fast that they were little less than damp by the time that she had her son in dry, clean clothes. he couldn't get cold, they had learned that much early on when he had refused to leave the bath even after it had gotten ice cold. 

It was a moment that made a few pretty clear about how special their children were. They processed beating hearts yet could never grow cold and the hoped that they were never going to become ill or get hurt, but still, she never wanted the opportunity to come up where it could happen. 

She wanted more than anything to just tell her family about their little trip to the ocean, through the ocean, because she knew that Bella would have been absolutely beside herself to know what they had done, just as she would have been if she had time to think things through. And after the worry faded they would have taken Romulus and Renesmee out to the water, a pool or the ocean, and they would have held them close as they swam -- photographing every second of the moment so that they could never dare to forget. 

It was impossible not to spend a second of the plane ride thinking back to them, wishing that she was back in Forks with them, cuddling and just holding them close. She felt so strained, drained out and pulled thin the further that she drew away from them. 

As it was, this was only the second time that she had been away from Forks, the first time that she had actually been truly so far from her family when it was all together, when she had them firmly in hand, firmly in heart and she in theirs. Roman didn't know what she was going to do with the itch that grew under her skin the longer she was away from them. 

When she had been given herself to them so completely, she had never imagined that she would leave, sure, she had thought of it, had thrown empty threats, but she had never wanted to actually be anywhere without them. 

From the moment she had first seen Edward, the moment she had first met his eye, she had been captured, bewitched body and soul, promised to never fall in love with another. And then Bella came and she had fallen in love again, had felt herself tumble and fall until she was destined to never be taken by another.  

And she didn't want another, didn't want to face a time where she was forced to be without them, but if there was anything for her to go by, then she would be back soon. She had to be if the feeling in her chest that only grew, only burned and spread the further she went, the longer they were apart, then she had to be back. 

If she was home instead of on this plane, curtain shut tight and Romulus fast asleep on her lap, she would have been tucked into their side, pressed between them both as they spoke in silent words and gentle presses of fingers that touched at her innocently. They would have been gathered together on the couch, watching as Renesmee and Romulus played or read or slept or did just about anything. 

Or they could have very well been on their way to make the same trip that they were making, but at least they would have been together and happy and she wouldn't have felt like she was betraying them. 

Roman was a horrible, traitorous person, and she could only hope that they would be able to forgive her. 

The thought that her daughter, that her little Renesmee had to be left behind, that she was meant to face the Volturi without her there -- meant to face possible death and all that time in between living in this state of uncertainty only made her feel worse.