Treat you better

Part 43- Two hearts meet

ROSALY

Rosaly came home from a day's work at the gym and sighed with relief. Traffic was hellish that day, and the subway she was taking to work was packed. That was the problem in the city of São Paulo, you would wake up very early, and then spend whole hours in the traffic jam, or in a crowded subway. Rosaly always preferred the subway as a means of transportation, it was faster than the bus, and although the number of passengers was higher, she didn't have to worry about the heavy traffic, wondering if she would arrive late or not at work.

She took off her shoes, sighed with relief, sat down on the sofa and opened the bag, and from inside she took out a leaflet. Her eyes ran quickly over what was written, while her hands trembled nervously and her heart squeezed with nostalgia.

Shawn would come to Brazil that month and do some shows around the country, and one of the cities chosen was São Paulo She closed her eyes, and the image of his face appeared in her clear and sharp mind, as if he were there at that very moment.

She had been back to Brazil for three months, leaving behind the man she loved and her heart, and it had been a daily battle nt to call him or sending messages. She knew she had lost that right when she left him, but her heart seemed not to understand that it was all over, that she had finished everything and could not go back. She still loved Shawn too much, she spent sleepless nights thinking about him, remembering those incredible brown eyes, his low, husky voice in her ears when they made love, and his warm embraces in the morning. She still had the CD with his songs that Adriane had recorded for her, but she avoided listening to them, as she inevitably ended up crying, just as she avoided looking for any news related to him. She didn't want to know where he would be and with whom, because that would hurt her too much. She had no illusions that he would be alone for a long time, since there were plenty of girls at Shawn's door who would gladly comfort him if he so wished.

When she returned to Brazil she was devastated, she felt as if she had left behind her whole life, her newly discovered happiness, and the only man she would ever love. Those were difficult days of loneliness and sadness. She did not feel like going out or seeing her old friends again. She had the impression that her life was over and the fighting spirit, which had always accompanied her in the worst situations, had left her that time. She was tired of running away, she was tired of losing the things she loved most and always having to start again from scratch. That was no life for anyone.

Caio was still missing, but she was sure that he would appear at any moment, and that no longer frightened her. She'd already been through the worst things in his hands, and Rosaly knew what he was capable of, so she didn't fear him anymore. She had lost the man of her life because of him, and nothing else mattered to her. She just wanted it all to be over soon and she could live in peace.

She didn't know what her life would be like after that, and she didn't want to think about it now. She was more worried about how to survive every day without Shawn. He'd never looked for her or even sent a message wanting to know how she was doing. Not thats he'd been waiting for it. Rosaly had left him in the middle of the night, with only one letter explaining why she did it, and Shawn must have been hurt with it. She wouldn't take away his reason. Maybe he'd already forgotten her and found someone more uncomplicated to love, and that thought made her moan in pain. Because even if she tried not to think about it, it mattered a lot not to be Shawn's girl anymore, not to be her to wake up with him in the morning, not to be the one he would give the last smile to before he fell asleep. She had lost that right some months ago.

What had helped her to stay focused and not to give herself up to despair was the support of her family. Her mother and brother had been incredible, giving her affection and even lap when she needed to cry. Her friend Daniele was always by her side, and she was her main confidant when her longing for Shawn was intolerable, and Rosaly needed to talk about him and how important he was in her life.