This isn't the end

Saying goodbye to Tommy

I love Tommy. I wish he didn't have to go back to college. But he has to. It's a new year. So I guess I'll have to survive another year without him.

In that moment Tommy walked out the front door with his last suitcase and Jack, our little brother, was running behind him and asking: »Does this mean I get your room Tommy?«

Mom answered instead of Tommy: »No, sweatheart. Your room is okay too. We have to leave Tommy's room for when he comes to visit.«

I laughed and looked at Jack: »«Jacky, you can get my room  when I leave. Sounds good?«

He ran back inside looking happier than ever. I turned back to Tommy and said with a tear in my eye: »I'm going to miss you, you know that?«

He laughed and then teased me: »Well April, I don't know how you'll manage without me. But I'll be back soon. Don't worry.« He hugged me, looked at mum, George (my step-dad) and said goodbye. He sat in the car. We all waved at him when he drove away and went back inside.

It was still very hot even though the time was around 7 in the evening. When I set off to my room to take a quick shower I heard mom said to George, clearly relieved: »Finaly he's gone. I thought he'd never leave. I know he's only been here for the summer but it felt like forever. I couldn't be happier he's gone.«

I didn't listen to the rest of the conversation. I went upstairs and sat on my bed thinking. I thought mom loved him. I mean, he's my older brother. The star of this family. Although he's not that tall, he's extremly smart. He's handsome, he has baby blue eyes and wavy brown hair. He always looks like he doesn't care about other people's opinions, he dresses how he likes, his hair always look messy but it's that kind of messy where you know every messy hair is right where it's supposed to be. As i said, a perfect child. That's why he got a scholarship to one of those fancy schools I don't even remeber the name of.

Meanwhile I'm just an ordinary 17 year old girl. Smart but not that smart, always trying to catch my brother in his achievements. Yet I'm never realy successful at that. He always knew what he wanted to study. Meanwhile every idea I get on what I want to do gets shut down by my mother. It sucks. Because she says I can study anything yet when I tell her what she shuts me down.

I brushed away this thoughts, took a shower and went to bed. Tomorrow senior year starts. Supposedly the best year of our lives. Who knew that that wasn't the case.

I met with my best friend Valerie. She's tall, slim and very sporty. She's a big sports fan. We said hello and went inside.

First days were usually kind of slow. School lunch was better than usual. Probably a way to keep the freshmen to eat school food. Sooner or later they'll learn that the only good food is the one you bring from home or the one you buy in the nearby shop. They have the most delicious croissants. I might have an obssesion with them, at least Valerie says so. Every time Patty is here I want her to try them, but they are always closed. I might mention that Patty is my other bestfriend. From before I moved here. We still stay in touch and we visit eachother. Can't wait for when she comes here for my birthday. Which is in two months but still. Can't wait.

* * * * * * * * *

I hate the first month of school. I didn't realy miss my clasmates, nothing is happening and we don't have anything to study yet.

Last night Valerie texted she has something she wants to tell me. I think it might have something to do with Felix. She's bee hanging out with him a lot lately. He's a year younger but they realy seem to hit it off. I noticed that they texted more too, he even waited for her after school. I teased her when are they going to make it official since we ALL know that they are hanging a lot lately. But I'll see, maybe it doesn't have anything to do with that.

I waited for her before lunch. We went outside and sat on a bench in front of the school. She seemed nervous. Anytime she had something big to tell me she didn't look me in the eyes.

»So Val, what's going on?« I started.

»Well, we made it official. We are together. I have a boyfriend now.« she seemed extremly happy and nervous, like she didn't know how I'd react.

I heard what she said but my brain couldn't procces for a second. I felt like someone punched me in the stomach. I felt sick. I felt hurt. But I managed to squeze out: »That's great Val. I'm happy for you.« I hugged her.

I wanted to get out of there as soon as possible.

»I-I-I have to go to the bathroom.« I stuttered and quickly went back inside.

The rest of the day was a blur. When I came home I went straight to my room. I started thinking. I first got jealous when she's started hanging out with Felix. At first I didn't think anything of it. But today ... and then it hit me. She's not JUST my friend. I like her. I like her more than a friend. Holy cow! I have a crush on my best friend. I guess I'm not as straight as i thought I was.

Thank you so much for reading my story. If you like it make sure you share it with your friends. I will appreciate it very much <3 I hope you'll enjoy the next chapter as well.