True Colors

III

There are just some things that is hard to forget. Things you don't think about but still manage to invade your thoughts.

Not so long ago, while I was visiting my mother's grave, I saw him standing there. He arrived earlier than me and that left me striding towards him angrily.

I put the flowers I bought for my mother down -- lilacs have always been her favorite. If he was surprised to see me, he hid it well.

"P'." He called, and my knuckles turned white as I tried so hard not to just punch him in the face.

"You know, whenever I think about all those times you came to our house and met my mother, I can't help but think how you can stomach lying to her as well." I said calmly, surprised that my own voice wasn't shaking with the anger I feel inside. "I mean, I've never exactly been the best friend you could ever have so I get it if you lied to me but my mom? She has been nothing but kind to you. I don't know how you could've slept soundly at night with that."

"She knows, P'." He whispered.

Oh, I know. I already have a hunch that my mother did, knowing the kind of saint that she was.

"She knew it since the first time you brought me there."

Wow. He even have the audacity to sound sad.

"P', I'm so--"

"Don't." I cut him off, hard and cold, leaving him no choice but to shut his yap.

I started to take my leave when I remembered something very important to tell him. "Don't let me see your face here again." He kept his back turned on me, staring at my mother's grave. "If I do, I couldn't guarantee that you'll make it out here alive. Extend that threat to Chayapol." And with that, I left.

You must be thinking I'm being unfair. That it wasn't his fault to be the result of Chayapol's affair. You must be pitying him and how hard of a time he had being kept as a secret.

Well, don't.

First of all, he wasn't kept in the dark. I knew that he met Chayapol more times than he's ever been home. I know that while my mother lay alone in bed, Chayapol and his woman kept each other warm.

I may have hate him but the hate I feel towards Chayapol could be compared to nothing.

Honestly, if he just told me he's my brother, I would've been okay with it. But alas, he kept it from me, obeying Chayapol to befriend me while keeping who he really is from me.

That. That I couldn't stand.

I loath being lied to.

---

"You're frowning again."

Being pulled away from the memory, I turned and found Apple sitting in the coffee table in front of me. The only light illuminating the living room is from the moon peeking inside through the glass window. I took her hand and guided her to sit on my lap instead. "You know it's dangerous to sit there, right? I don't want you to hurt yourself when it breaks."

The effect is immediate and she smiled, playfully pretending to be annoyed and hurt. "Are you calling me fat now, my prince?"

"Never, milady." I smiled mischievously, cupping the base of her head so I could kiss her forehead. I can feel her smile as she wrapped her arms around me, gently combing my hair.

"Is it that bad?" She asked after a relative amount of comfortable silence.

"No." I answered, whispering the lie.

I heard her sigh which tells me that she saw through it but, thankfully, dropped the subject.

This is one of the things I love about her -- she knows when to push and knows when to pull.