"Nothing is ever easy when Evan Buckley is in your life."
** I do not own 9-1-1 or their characters. Stella Moore, Gigi, Mazzey, Amanda, Tyler, Savannah, Russell and any other character that will show up later in the story and events that will occur...
{Songs for this chapter: *Still falling for you - Ellie Goulding *What have I done? - Dermot Kennedy}
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Buck has been in a coma for a week. There is no telling when he will wake. A few people at the hospital have been thinking he might not but I beg to differ. I've visited him every single day and I talk to him every single day. My feelings for him have not came up during any of those conversations yet, I'm terrified to say them out loud. Gigi says he probably can't even hear me but I know he can. Yesterday, while I was telling him about how I was thinking about the night we spent at the beach and wish we could be there, he squeezed my hand and everyone thinks I'm going insane but I know what I felt.
Maddie seems to be the only one to really believe me. We've never met until now and I wish I had before all of this did happen. She's an incredible person and I couldn't thank her enough for the help she's given me. I recognized her voice from the calls the second she introduced herself to me. Our first encounter involved a lot of sniffling, tissues, crying and hugging. I'm glad she hasn't tried telling me it's okay to go home because that's what everyone at work has been doing. The chief doesn't think it's a good idea for me to come back to work no matter how hard I try to tell him I'm fine, that I need to work or I'll go insane.
My attempt to get back to work immediately resulted in the chief ordering me to take a vacation. For a month. I'm a first year surgical intern how the hell can I take a vacation? I told him that could jeopardize my future and he assured me it wouldn't considering the events I've experienced and how he explained that to the board. And he was not letting me come back to work anytime soon.
I was able to talk him down to two weeks but still it wasn't what I wanted because he wasn't going to let me work now. What the hell am I supposed to do? I need to be here, saving lives and closer to Buck, not being stuck at Gigi's house losing my mind. I'm too afraid to leave the hospital in case something happens with Buck while I'm not here.
Amanda constantly drops by Bucks room to check on him, and me but she should be more worried about him. Tyler has came by a few times too with Mazzey. Savannah only came once to tell me she hopes he pulls through. I couldn't be any more surprised by the sour look on her face when she saw me holding his hand. She chooses the wrong time to be jealous. But it's Savannah, what did I expect?
I grab his left hand and hold it up to my face, brushing my thumb against his skin. Maybe he'll squeeze my hand again today. I hope.
A small knock at the door breaks my train of thought. Maddie steps into the room, quietly pulling one of the chairs closer to Evans bed. Her eyes are red and puffy. She looks like she hasn't slept in days. What else would you expect from a worried sister when her brother is in this kind of state?
"Hey" she whispers softly at me.
"Hey," I don't let go of his hand, "how are you?" I ask.
"I'm okay. What about you?" "Okay." "Have you been here all day?" She asks. I nod.
