What We Lost | Fillie

Chapter Twenty Three: The Brown's

Finn and Millie get back to LA from St. Louis in the late afternoon. The sun hangs low in the sky making the horizon glow orange as they make their way up the driveway to Millie's home in the Hollywood hills. Finn knows that none of her protective family members are aware of what happened while they were in St. Louis and they are about to be blindsided. Blindsided individuals do not not typically use the best decision making skills and Finn has a—what he feels is well founded—fear that he won't be coming back down this driveway alive.

The last time he was this scared to see Millie's parents was when they told them that she was pregnant in the summer of 2020. After dropping that bomb on them, they had sat in the heaviest silence Finn had ever felt for five excruciatingly long minutes, the whole time feeling like water was rising around him up to his neck and consuming him whole. Only after feeling like he'd drowned, did Millie's dad slowly stand up, staring daggers into his soul as he growled at him to go out back for what ended up being a very loud and very long conversation about his and Millie's life decisions. If he could survive that, he'll surely live through this too. . . right?

"Hey." Millie whispers, pulling him out of his head, squeezing his hand that is sweating profusely into her palm. "It's gonna be okay, Finn. They'll understand." she assures him.

He swallows the massive lump that has been building in his throat while staring up the ever-shortening driveway at the house that is glowing red from from the descending sun, making it look like the gates of hell, "I wish I could say that I believe you, but considering how mad I was at myself. . . I can't imagine how pissed they are. If someone treated my daughter the way I treated you. . ." his head presses back against the head-rest, his jaw grinding. "There is no way I'd let me back in your life."

Her lips press together in thought, "You know," She starts, "they've had time to digest everything. . .I mean it's been two years, it's not so raw anymore."

The car comes to a stop in front of the main garage. Finn put's the vehicle in park and slumps in his seat, staring wide-eyed out the windshield. His stomach feels  like it is going to come up through his throat.

"I'm serious, Finn." Millie insists, but he only maintains his blank stare out the front window.

She grabs his chin and turns his head toward her. "Finn." she repeats in an entrancingly soothing tone while staring into his eyes. "Breathe." She whispers, and he does. She watches him as he feels his pupils grow larger. She leads him in taking in a few more deep breaths, releasing them slowly. When they are finished, she leans in and gives him a brief yet deep kiss. "Better?" She asks.

Finn doesn't know how Millie learned the ability to bring someone this sense of complete peace, but he's so thankful she did. And maybe it isn't even a learned thing but just a Millie thing. Either way, he is feeling a great deal better and ready to tackle the problem before them. He expels the last of the air from his lungs and answers his girlfriend with a smile, "Considerably."

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Millie feels terrible about boosting Finn's confidence so much in the car because less than ten minutes later, the smile he had is long gone. It's probably halfway across the pacific ocean by now and instead, his face currently displays an expression more congruent with someone trying to hide from a grizzly bear behind a twig.

When they first got to the house she went in with him and summoned her family to the kitchen, except Ava who was playing Roblox and couldn't be bothered. She broke the news like her mother always tore off her bandaids as a child. Sharp and swift. Now she thinks that may have been a mistake.