Deep Asleep

Chapter 13 : Bottle

As she promised, Max accompanied Jane for her reeducation. The therapist explained her that Jane needed to become aware of her defects, and that it wouldn't be easy to watch because Jane would feel lots of pain. The redhead felt stressed, she began to wonder if all of this was a good idea! But Jane seemed to need some support, and Max really wanted to help her, so she thought she could do it. She wasn't allowed to go to all of Jane's reeducation as she had some with a group, but sometimes she was alone with a coach, and she could stay next to her. Today her reeducation was focused on the top of her body, which meant her neck, her back, and her arms. Jane had a water bottle in her right hand, and, for now, the coach just wanted her to close her hand around it.

- "Does it hurt?" Max asked, seeing Jane's tensed face.

- "Yes," Jane answered, gritting her teeth.

The brunette dropped the bottle, making her angrier than before.

- "I'm done!"

- "One more time," the coach told.

- "I said I was done!"

- "No, you're not, you held it five seconds more than last time, it's a good step forward."

- "Five seconds!? It's nothing!"

- "No, it's not!" Max intervened. "I mean, when you do a physical effort like that, five seconds, it's a lot. When I was beginning skateboarding, I was timing how many times I could stay on it without falling, and every time I was staying five seconds more than before, I was so proud of me! It's hard, and maybe five seconds mean nothing for you because when you're counting in your head it's fast, but when you're holding a water bottle as tight as you did, it's harder than just counting. Every time you're holding this bottle five seconds more, you're gaining more strength and more independence."

Jane clenched her jaw and looked away. She hated feeling weak like that, holding a bottle shouldn't be painful. Everyone was able to do some many things but not her!? It was unfair and pathetic. The coach placed again the bottle in Jane's hand, but the brunette dropped it again on the floor.

- "You will never make progress if you don't try," the man told.

- "I don't need to hold a bottle! This is ridiculous!"

- "Oh yeah? And how are you gonna drink if you can't hold a bottle?" Max frowned.

- "I can use a fucking straw!"

- "All your life!? You're ready to live with the frustration of giving up just because you could use a straw!?"

- "...Yes!"

- "No, even if I don't know you since a while, I can tell that you have some pride, you won't live forever with a straw while everyone else is drinking with their own hands."

Jane lightly rolled her eyes before looking away. She was so tired, she didn't know how all of this could work on her, she never needed to do all of this before, so why now? It was stupid, it would come back by their own. But, if it didn't? She would hate her all her life for that and drinking with a straw all her life would cost her a lot in straws! She sighed loudly with her nose before turning again to them and holding out her hand. The man smiled to her and placed the bottle in her hand before timing her.

Jane did all the exercises of the day, with more or less motivation, but now she was exhausted, and the pain made her cry at the end of the day. Max stayed with her the entire day, it was hard for her too, seeing someone struggling by just staying sat for a few seconds was painful to watch, especially if this person finished by crying while doing it. The coach brought her back in her room before asking Max if he could talk to her in private.

- "What is it?" Max asked.

- "Your presence seems to be a good thing for Jane, you seem to be a good support, but I think she needs to be in a group with other people like her, to realize she is not alone."

- "Um, okay, what can I do for this?"

- "You could talk to her about this, without insisting, you already convinced her to do her reeducation and this is amazing, but she needs to be in a group to progress, it could help her, mentally and morally, do you understand?"

- "Oh yeah, of course, no problem, if I can still see here after, I see no problem with that. I'll talk to her."

- "Okay, thank you," the man smiled.

Max nodded before coming back in Jane's room and sitting on the armchair. Jane was laying down on her back, her eyes still wet. The redhead took a tissue and wiped the brunette's eyes.

- "You shouldn't come tomorrow."

- "Why not?"

- "It's not physical reeducation. I won't be a good company."

- "I don't come here to have some company, but to give you some. We don't have to talk if you don't want to, but if you don't want me to come, it's okay, I'll come the day after."

- "Do what you want, I don't care."

- "Oh, really?" Max smirked. "It's not you who wanted me to come today? And you want me to believe you when you say that you don't care?"

- "Shut up for once," Jane lightly chuckled.

- "See? You're not so bad a company. You had been amazing today."

- "I cried, that's not amazing."

- "You cried because you gave all you had, because you're strong! For someone in your condition, it's amazing!"

- "Yeah...in my condition..."

- "Look, I won't be allowed to always come with you in reeducation, the coach wants you to integrate a group."

- "No!" Jane got angry. "I don't need to integrate a group! They are in a worse state like me, it would be a waste of time!"

- "That's not true, Jane, they are doing exactly the same exercises as you, the difference is that they can understand what you are living, and why it's hard, me, I can't! I know it's hard, but I don't live what you're living, I'm just...a good company."

- "Yeah...you are. But you don't treat me like a fragile and weak person, you don't look at me with pity in your eyes...I feel normal."

- "Yeah...I'm not the only one, you know, the coach looks at you the same way, and I'm sure people in your case will definitely not look at you like that, because they know how painful it is to be looked like that."

- "You're smart."

- "No, I'm not! I tried to learn how to play chess, but it's still a mystery for me!"

- "Why did you do that?" Jane frowned.

- "Because you used to play chess, and I thought I could help you to remind you how to play."

- "Why?"

- "I wanted to help you. And chess seemed to be important in your life so..."

- "I don't remember..."

- "I know."

Max smiled to her and grabbed her hand to rub it. Jane was still not widely smiling, but the redhead was glad to see the hint of a smile on her face. After a day like that, it was unexpected.