Relight The Fire

Fire 29

Pagod akong pumasok sa bahay. I didn’t bother glancing to anyone , I walk straight to my room. I wanna rest... What happened earlier flashed in my head, how did I manage to do it?

I sighed. Maybe it’s my adrenaline. If Averill didn’t chose me what would I do?

A sudden knocked interrupt me. “Azalea,”

Without changing my clothes I lied my side body on my bed. I curled my self into ball and pretended to be asleep. I don’t wanna talk to anyone, right now. I know I’m shutting them out when their intention is just to help me...but there will be some times that it’s better to be alone and self- reflect than having anyone by your side.

They might have different opinion from what you’re feeling that may add up to your problem... Adding burden to what you’re feeling. And I am in that situation, what I did might be not good for them but for me it is.

We have different perspective in lives and they just can’t push me to understand theirs just like mine.

“Azalea, wanna talk with me?” Kuya asked and sat at side of the bed. He is caressing my shoulder while he is facing my back. I didn’t flinched and continue pretending.

When he didn’t received a respond I felt the side of the bed moved, a sign that he stood up. “When you’re ready to share... Come to me.”
Kasunod naman nito ang pag- bukas at pagsira ng pinto.

“I’m sorry, Kuya. I know you wanted to help me but I don’t wanna drag you in this situation that you have to be in between on me and Averill. Knowing that I’m your sister and he is your friend... I don’t want to make things more complicated... Tama nang ako lang nahihirapan at naguguluhan.” I said in hoarse voice.

A midnight breeze woke me up from my sleep. I forgot to close the sliding door in the veranda making the wind come inside. With a comforter wrapped on my body and sleepy eyes, I walk outside the veranda. I was just going to close it but I found myself sitting in a single couch.

From here I could see the dark sky filled with a small and a thousand star. As if telling me that it may dark today but there will be still a small glimpse of light that can lighten it. I smile bitterly.

“What’s wrong, hija?” Mama asked, while we are in the table for breakfast. It is Sunday and we chose to go church on it’s last mass.

Umiling ako. “Pagod lang ma.” Mapanuring tingin naman ang pumukol sa akin nang mahagip ko ang gawi ni Papa. I know there is something going on his mind, a lot of scenarios to be exact, and he just chose to shut because he knew me... I will ask for help if I can’t handle it anymore.

Nakayuko lang si Kuya, his attention is focused on his plate na ang tanging laman ay prutas. Maybe he is on his fasting diet again.

Well, that’s my brother’s way taking good care of his health. Gusto ko rin sanang mag- gym kaso nakakatamad, alam mo ‘yon. ‘Yung feeling na gusto mong may gawin pero dahil bored ka pero hindi mo rin magawa dahil tamad ka.

“Akyat lang po ako sa kwarto.” paalam ko pa bago tumayo.

I turned on my laptop and wait for a few seconds para umilaw ito. Nang tuluyan ko nang mabuksan, I typed my password and opened my facebook account. Pagka- bukas ko ay sumalubong sa akin ang  mga litrarto ni Aiken kasama ang isang lalaki. Dressed in black highwaist jeans na may punit sa kaliwang tuhod, black halter na crop top style, she wore a timberland black boots. She is a walking sin, kahit sa litrato makikita mo kung gaano ka alaga ang katawan niya. Her curves are on its right position, her oblique is showing dahil naka crop top nga siya, making her more hot and gorgeous. Idagdag mo pa ang pulang buhok niya, mas bata siya sa akin ng kaunting taon but how can her body look matured than mine. Naka all black rin ang lalaki gaya niya, maybe he is her boyfriend. They look good together. He is handsome too, but I have Averill.