You are my life

Cold Feet

(Piper's POV)

Alex came home from work in a chipper mood.
I was just home myself so hadn't had the chance to get out of my pantsuit yet let alone my heels.
Samantha, my managing partner, was acting weird most of the day today and I didn't understand why.
I could hear Alex's heels clicking on the hardwood floor of our apartment, on the hunt for me.
She found me at the fridge, snacking on what I could find in there while also grabbing a bottle of my favourite organic smoothie.
"Mmmm, hey you." She smiles, wrapping her arms around me from behind and kissing my cheek.
I smile, swallowing the gulp of smoothie I'd taken.
"Mmm, well hello to you too."

I could almost feel the smirk plastered on her face.
She wanted something.
Either that or she had a plan.
Or both.
"I can feel you smirking back there so whatever it is, spit it out Al." I tell her, turning around to face her and putting my smoothie bottle on the island.
"Okay so listen Pipes, back in 2004 we-"
She started but was cut off by loud, repetitive knocking on our door.
"Are you expecting anyone?" I ask her while going to answer the door.
She shakes her head,
"No are you?" I shake my head also.
"You were gonna say something Al?" I ask but she shakes her head.
"It can wait, go answer the door."

So I do and find Nicky in our doorway with a very large grin and a couple of six packs of beers in her arms. Zelda was behind her along with a few of Alex's colleagues, her Aunt Pearl and cousin Victoria who I'd met a handful of times. Polly was even here.
I frown in confusion and call Alex.
"Al?!"
She comes to the door and grins although it falters a bit when she sees Zelda and Polly.
"Oh my God hi guys! Aunt Pearl! Vicky!" She shouts excitedly and hugs them all, inviting them into our apartment.
"What are you guys doing here?!" She asks happily, taking a beer from Nicky who was handing them out to everyone and cracking it open.
"Plying you two with alcohol then dragging you both to the nearest bar." Nicky explains with her Nicky smirk.
I take a gulp of my beer and set it down.
"Mmmm uh uh. I'm not getting drunk again Nicky. I know this is like a joint bachelorette party and after what happened at the one Polly put together for me, I'm not taking my chances." I warn, looking between Alex and Zelda who momentarily glare at each other regardless of them being business partners.

Alex's Aunt Pearl sees the tension between her and Zelda and jumps in to change the subject.
"So Piper! I hear this niece of mine finally put my sister's ring on your finger! C'mere and let me see how it looks!" She exclaims and pulls me over to her so she could see my engagement ring.
Alex chuckles,
"Careful with her arm Aunt Pearl! I need that arm intact so I can put the wedding band on her finger as well."
"Speaking of which Alex, you still haven't told me when the big day is." She scolds her niece.
Alex flounders and looks at me for help.
"Well, uh, Pipes and I still have so much stuff to go over, I mean we still have to find a caterer and the menu-" She starts to explain but Nicky interrupts.
"What about June 7th?"
"What?" Alex asks.
"What?!" I growl and glare at Alex,
"You told her!"
Alex puts her hands up in surrender.
"Hey, I swore her to secrecy, she saw something was up with you last year and asked me." Alex explains.
"And you couldn't have lied?! You do that to me a lot or is it only me you lie to?!" I snap.
"Way to go Nichols." She growls and glares at Nicky.
"What has she lied about? Alex what did you lie about?" Aunt Pearl asks.
"Yes Alex, what did you lie about?" I sarcastically ask.
I was angry at her.
She knew I hated my birthday and other people knowing when it was.
Again, Alex flounders.
"I um, I-"
I impatiently cut her off.
"She cheated on me dear knows how many times with a prison guard, lied about it then broke up with me and Nicky here started the affair!" I spit.
Alex's colleagues, her relatives and Polly sit with their mouths wide open, gobsmacked.
"Alex Vause! Your mother did not raise a cheater! Not after the way she was treated by your father! I get that Sylvia girl because you didn't love her and she was more than distant with you but Piper?!" Aunt Pearl yells at her to which Alex cowers guiltily.
"She broke up with you Pipe?!" Polly asks me and I nod, taking a swig of beer.
"You broke up with her after cheating on her?! Was it so you could be with the guard?! And she still went to Ohio for you?!" She growls at Alex.
"Listen Holly, I broke up with her to set her free because I love her, NOT to be with the CO! She was entertainment to me. A shield in case Piper left me for Zelda here. Nothing more!" Alex growls back.
"You cheated too?" Aunt Pearl asks me.
"Alex opened our relationship." I explain.
Then Alex turns on me.
"You cheated first!"
"You opened our relationship! Told me to go have sex with other people to keep me happy while you were in there! Well news flash Alex, I left you a voicemail saying I wasn't happy doing that but you still cheated on me!" I retort.
"I was talking about Stella and that was for you! I wanted to make you happy!"
"Stella and I never went as far as you and McCullough! Never mind the probable amount of times you slept together!" I yell with glassy eyes.
"Maybe we should leave this until another time?" Victoria cautiously cuts in.
"You know what? Getting drunk does sound like a good idea. Polly, Zelda wanna ride with me?" I ask, heading for the front door.
"I don't think so Piper! Not after last time!" Alex booms.
"What happened last time?" Nicky and Victoria ask.
"Oh, well Piper here was ready to fuck Zelda and leave me for one night apparently." Alex growls.
"I was drunk Alex and we'd just had yet another fight over McCullough!" I defend.
"You know what Piper? I'm sick of fighting over McCullough, over Zelda, over Stella. Maybe now's the time to tell you!" Alex starts.
"Alex," Nicky cuts in, "you sure you want to?" She nervously asks.
"Oh I'm sure. It's time Piper knows I love her and only her." She says quickly to Nicky before swiftly turning back to me.
"You're not going back to work for the next two weeks." She tells me and gives me that look as if she's dating me to challenge her on this.
But I'm in a daring mood.
"Samantha might have a problem with that." I scoff.
"She knows and enough with the attitude Piper or I'll refund our tickets to Fiji." She says matter of factly, lifting her chin up ever so slightly in victory knowing she'd won this little spat.
"Fiji?" I ask in a small voice.
She nods.
"Mhm. That's what I was trying to tell you earlier before you turned on me. I thought it'd be nice for us to relive those memories and to get away from this stressful life. A romantic getaway. Just the two of us. Like we talked about last night. Kinda like a pre-wedding honeymoon. I know how stressed work and prepping for our wedding is getting you, is getting us. I'm letting this fight go because it just proves my point. We need to get away. Just us. We need to bond a little more." She says, finishing with a sex allusion and an eyebrow raise with a smirk to break the tension.
I felt so shit about starting that stupid fight now.
I stood there with my eyes getting glassy.
She was right.
Work and getting everything arranged and organised for our wedding was really draining me.
She chuckles softly and opens her arms,
"Come here." She smiles and I walk into her arms which she quickly wraps around me.
"I'm sorry." I muffle into her shoulder.
She kisses my head,
"It's okay. I love you."
"I love you too." I say and kiss her.
"Aw look at that, they made up." Aunt Pearl comments then says, "Right ladies I don't know about you but I could do with a stronger drink!" She smiles cheerfully.
"I second that!" Nicky pipes up.
Alex wraps her arm around my waist and brings me into her, both of us laughing.

After we were a couple of drinks in, I was sitting at the bar while Alex was laughing and doing shots in our booth with her relatives, colleagues, Zelda and Polly. Nicky had found her way to the stool beside me where I was spinning my glass slowly between my fingers.
"You okay Chapman? I mean, between the fight with Alex earlier and now the long face, what's up?" She asks.
I frown.
"I don't know Nicky I guess I'm just feeling a bit insecure. I want to trust her again, I do, and I think I do, ugh, I don't know." I sigh I'm frustration and swipe my hand through my hair.
"Wait, you're not getting cold feet are you?" She asks nervously.
"No. I do really want to marry Alex, I proposed to her first remember? I love her more than anything or anyone in the world and I want to spend the rest of my life with her but does she want to spend the rest of hers with me? I don't even know if I make her happy anymore, I mean she cheated on me and cited her reason for doing it as being her mistrust in me. She even broke up with me Nicky but I just couldn't let her go. Ugh, I'm so pathetic." I say, almost crying and dropping my head between my shoulders.
Nicky looks at me sympathetically.
"Hey. Hey, look at me." She says.
I do so she continues.
"I've only known you and Vause for a little over a year but in that time I've never seen her so happy. And believe me, I meant it when I said she was like a hurt little puppy when you left her in prison. Twice." She tells me.
I glare at her.
"You encouraged her to cheat on me Nicky." I growl.
"No I didn't. I showed her a picture of McCullough to cheer her up. She hates being apart from you. Hates it. She was just scared you were going to leave her again Chapman. You can't deny that fear. It's pretty justified. But I mean look at her. Look at her now that you're promising to be a part of her life forever." She explains, finishing with nodding her head in Alex's direction who had the biggest grin on her face.
I smile and continue to stare at her as Nicky continues to speak.
"You leave for Fiji with her tomorrow. She booked it for you. For you both. Out of nothing but love and consideration for your feelings and her feelings towards you. I was the one she ran the idea past. She was telling me she just wants to take you away from all the stress, she wants you to relax, she wants to spend some quality time with you because she knows and I quote, she 'hasn't exactly been the partner of the year.' She really loves you Piper. She even keeps a framed photo of you both in Fiji on her desk. It's almost nauseating how much she loves you." Nicky tells me and gets up, patting me on the shoulder and turns to walk back to the booth.
"It's true, I do." Alex says from my left making me jump out of my skin.
"Jeez! Al, how long have you been sitting there?!" I ask her, clutching my heart.
"Long enough to know that everything Nichols said is true. I really do love you Pipes, clearly more than you will ever know or understand." She says.
"I love you too." I smile and she leans in to kiss me deeply.