To Our Own Beat (Urban)

Promises to Keep

All the comments on the last chapter really made me feel special! I really love ya'll. Thanks for the support! Keep it up!

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A Month Later

Reagan

“I just don’t understand why being in love is so hard. I thought you find the person that you love, establish a relationship, trust each other and deal with the trials as they come. Why can’t it be that simple mom?” I spoke to my mom’s headstone.

                That night in the hotel room was pretty intense and it did something to me. It confused me. I wanted to be angry with Ricky because he didn’t trust me and he was letting that get in the way of my dream career. I wanted to be angry at Anthony because he shouldn’t have had ulterior motives. My dancing career should have been the extent of our relationship. I could understand though, that Anthony is who Ricky didn’t trust, not me. Soon enough I would have become emotionally attached to Anthony and that’s cheating emotionally.

                That night I didn’t choose either side. The next morning, I packed my bag and took the next flight to Chicago. Tee-tee’s brother Marquis moved back here to go to college and just decided to stay out here. He was letting me stay at his place for a while.

I came to my birthplace so that I could reflect and consider my next steps.  Ricky was definitely in my plans. We just have a few kinks we need to work out. I haven’t talked to him in a month. That will change when I head back to LA today.

“You ready to go, Rae?” Marquis asked me, as he walked up behind.

“Yeah.” I answered, nodding my head. I placed a single white rose on my mom’s grave before I turned to walk away.

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“Thanks for picking me up from the airport, Jewel. I appreciate it.” I said, as I grabbed my  suitcases out of the trunk of her car.

“Girl, you know it was no problem. I’m just happy that my bestie is back in the city.” She said, pulling me in for a hug. “Call me if you need me. We need to get together soon.” She said, getting back into her car.

“Most definitely.” I assured her with a smile. I waved as she pulled off and honked her horn.

                As I walked I noticed that Ricky’s car wasn’t parked next to mine in our appointed car port. I was kind of relieved because I wasn’t fully ready to see him yet. When I reached the apartment door, I hesitated before sticking my key into the lock. Why was I scared to walk into my own house?

                When I finally walked in, I felt comfortable. Ricky’s familiar scent lingered in the air and everything was the same way it was when I left for New York. I went into the bedroom and started to unpack.

                An hour later I was finished settling in. I took a long shower and slipped into some boy shorts, some knee-length socks and one of Ricky’ sweatshirts. I grabbed some snacks from the kitchen and made myself comfortable in the middle of our king-sized bed. I pulled out my journal and decided to write a little. It’s something I started to do while I was in Chicago. For some reason the lyrics to Life Itself by Chris Brown replayed over and over in my head.

“Just want you on my team girl
And I don't give a damn about nothing else but the way I feel with you
It's so amazing yeah
If I never get to see you oh
Then I might as well never even know open my eyes
I love you so that I can't let you go
And I ain't trying to be selfish no
Just here to tell you that you got my heart
And only you can tear it apart….”  

I sung to myself as I scribbled my feelings onto the pages of my journal. I had got so emotional that my falling tears began to smear the ink on my pages.  I knew that I had did enough writing for the day at that point. I put my journal away and cleaned up the trash from the snacks that I ate.  As I exited the kitchen, the front door opened and my heartbeat went into overdrive.  After a month, I finally looked my Schmoopie in the eyes.

I made the first move. I walked over to him and stood in front of him. I stood on my tippy toes and wrapped my arms around his neck. He embraced me tightly as we rocked back and forth. I didn’t want to pull away from him but, we had to talk.

“Promise me that you’ll never leave me like that again.” He said to me as cupped my face and pressed his forehead against mines.

“I promise you I won’t.” I said, as I wiped the tears that ran down his face.

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More adventures to come....Predictions!