there for me (shourtney)

ix.

shayne's pov -

I felt bad about the whole plan. That I knew. That I knew these videos stressed her. That I lied to Courtney about it. I watched her walk into makeup, and I knew that she was about to endure one of the most emotionally difficult videos. She knows nothing.

Ian quickly brought Keith, Damien, and I to the booth that observes all three rooms with a video monitor. So we could see and hear everything that was about to happen. I watched the actress in Courtney's room specifically. She looked exactly like Courtney, and she was planted in Courtney's first apartment. A strange sensation settled over me and pricked at my skin. It was weird seeing a drug-ridden version of Courtney in her first solo apartment. Something I know brought her so much joy, and now, this stranger inhabited it.

"Ian whats her drug?" I nodded toward Courtney's monitor.

"Alexis?" He looked at the notepad hung on the wall. Actress's name. "She's heroin."

"Got ya." I watched in silence for a few more minutes before I heard voices coming through the screen. Everyone was getting into place and the doors were being shut. Waiting for Olivia, Noah, and Courtney to walk in.

"It feels weird" Keith said as he walked over beside me to watch Noah's monitor. 

"Like a betrayal." I admitted and nodded my head. 

"Remember the cause, guys." Damien said as he stepped in the middle of us and placed a hand on either of our shoulders.

"True." Keith said quietly.

Silence took over us again as we watched each of them slowly enter their rooms. 

"Hey Shayne?" Ian said quietly from the doorframe leading to the hall. I looked over at him, and he motioned for me to follow him. I cast one last glance at the screens and walked out behind him.

He stood there, at the end of the hall, and led my eyes toward the other end of the hall to Courtney. Her frame stood there, fingertips hesitating on the doorframe. She looked over at us and twisted her hands together. 

I nodded at her. You can do it. It's okay. And with that, she opened the door and disappeared inside.

Ian and I made our way back into the room and all of us crowded the monitors. 

"I give props to Liv." Keith said as he crossed his arms and listened to the monitor. "In her version, she hasn't seen her mom in years."

"Oh wow." Damien said in a soft voice. 

A few minutes passed then Ian broke the silence. 

"How's Noah?" He asked and walked over to Damien who was watching him through the screen.

"He's doing okay. In his version, he smokes crack and lives with his enabling parents, but he hasn't seen his brothers since he got addicted." Damien's voice wavered. "Left rehab twice." 

"Woah." Ian said meekly.

I could hear Olivia through her monitor asking her actress questions about how to spread awareness, signaling she was done, but I kept my focus on Courtney and her reality. She's been very quiet, mostly walking around the room and noting how precise everything is. It's not real, Courtney, remember that.

She picked up a picture of her and Kari and ran her fingers over it.

"Stopped talking to me when I left rehab the third time." Her actress told her, gesturing weakly to the picture of the sisters smiling. "Told me she didn't know me anymore."

Courtney put the picture down carefully and I could hear her start sniffling. 

"What about him?" Courtney asked the actress as she held up a picture of her and I. Even from a distance I knew it was us. She was always one to take candid pictures then place them in frames around her apartment. "What about Shayne?" Her voice broke as she held the frame close to her chest.

"Shayne?" The actress scoffed. "Smosh fired me after a month. Don't need an explanation there."

"Oh god." Courtney squeezed her eyes shut and let tears run down her cheeks. "How do I?" She motioned around her to the apartment.

"Parents." The actress nodded, already knowing the question. "They feel bad." She shrugged.

Courtney put the frame back down and sat on the corner of the couch the actress was on. She clasped her hands in front of her face, bowed her head, and leaned into her fists. Sharp cries escaped her lips. Sobs that rocked her body and shallowed her breathing.

Please! My eyes darted from Courtney's bent figure to her actress. Help her! 

When the actress saw Courtney begin to break down she immediately sat up and went over to hug her. Mindful of her makeup.

"My names Alexis" She said softly. "I'm here to show you your life if you had chosen heroin." 

Courtney pulled away and wiped under her eyes. She pulled at my shirt she was wearing and an instant feeling of protectiveness hit me. I immediately wanted to be there and play angel.

"You're good" Courtney let out a watery laugh. "You're a good actress." She pressed the back of her hand against her lips and shut her eyes again.

"Just an act" I heard Alexis mutter to Courtney. She placed her hands gently on Courtney's trembling knees. "This isn't real. Ian, is that his name, he told me all about the people you are closest to." She smiled at Courtney. Please, soothe her.

I crossed my arms tightly across my chest. Damien came up next to me and lightly laid a hand on my shoulder.

"They're coming out now." He pointed with his thumb to the other monitors. "Want to come to get them?" I noticed Keith and Ian already heading out to the hallway.

I shot one last glance at the monitor in front of me, Alexis and Courtney were standing up and in a deep hug, and nodded. I patted Damien's back as we walked out of the room. Thank you for being here.

Noah and Olivia came out pretty much at the same time. They were quiet, and Noah had definitely been crying.  

I heard the last door open and a shaken version of Courtney stepped out. Walking a few paces down the hallway toward her, I called her name softly.

She didn't even close the door before looking over at me. She covered her mouth with her hands and bent over. Her back heaved with sobs. 

She suddenly stood up and ran over to meet me. Straight into my arms. The impact causing me to take a step back. She threw her arms around my neck and buried her face in my shirt. Instinctively, I wrapped my arms around her back. One on her waist, and the other rubbing up and down her spine with soft strokes. I pressed her close to me, feeling her body shake as she cried. 

"I hated that." She said through tears. 

"It wasn't real, Court." I said in a gentle voice. Reminding her that her reality is here with me.

"I didn't -" She took a breath "You weren't. I didn't have"

"Shh hey you're with me now. It's okay." I trailed one of my hands up to the base of her head let it stay there in her hair. The other still fastened around her waist.

"Shayne you weren't there. If I had - I wouldn't have you." She nuzzled closer into me. 

I pulled away and lifted her face with both hands to meet mine. 

"You have all of me." I began wiping the tears off of her face. "I'm right here. With you. And I'm staying." She smiled faintly and bit her lip to stop more tears. "Courtney look at me" She glanced up and I met her glassy emerald eyes. "Always"

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chap 9! hope you're liking it so far. also the pic at the top of suppose to be the picture of them that Courtney picks up. It seemed like it was from a while back, so i went with them having taken it when she had her first apartment. idk if that's legit but it works with the story :)