Chasing the Heart's Pursuit (Heart Series #1) - COMPLETED

Chapter 16

CONFESSION

16

I stared at him. I can't remember for how long though.

Risk? What is he talking about?

"Mory..." he spoke so softly. No teasing present in his face.

He then wetted his lips using the tip of his tongue. See? Ito yung ayaw ko. Pati simpleng pagdila niya napapansin ko na. I was even bothered with him dancing with his girlfriend. Ibang iba sa mga nakaraang buwan. Dati nga, ayaw ko man lang siyang kausapin tapos ngayon ganito.

"You can count this again as another favor if you like. You know? To lessen all the things that you owe from me. Do it. I don't care but please, listen to me first." He added.

"I asked you to stop talking to me last week for the reason that... I can't fucking accept. I don't want to lose our friendship. I was constantly chasing after you because I wanted to be your friend. But... lately..." He stopped. "... I started feeling different. I don't want others making you smile. I don't want you to give others your annoyed face. I want it to be just for me..."

Unti-unting napaawang ang mga labi ko habang nakatingin sa kanya. Though, I have a hint about this several days ago, I erased it since he already has a girlfriend. Nakita ko pa nga siyang kahalikan yun. Dagdag pa, na kilala na ito ng mga magulang niya.

Nagsimula akong magsalita. May girlfriend siya. That alone can be the reason why he should stop talking now.

"Hindi ba at may girlfriend ka at anong- " Naputol na naman ako sa pagsasalita.

"Me first, please. I need to say this now. And just to set the record straight, Nickee's not my girlfriend. I need to add, you know the guy from the Biochemistry Book, DNNO. That... that... was...me."

Ngayon, di ko na alam kung anong reaksyon ko.

"I know. I know. You're not expecting that. It was Saturday and I remember seeing you so amazed inside the library. I was curious about you so I followed you. I saw you writing and putting something in the book. Then, here comes Monday. We were in the same class. That day, you went again to the library and put something again. So I read it and was intrigued about it. Then, I replied."

I can hear his voice so low and soothing.

"I swear it was harmless. But then, you replied to me. I can of enjoyed talking to you in the book. That was the only time and chance that I was able to talk to you properly. Then, you became aggressive and an advocate about realities..."

Ngayon, hindi ko na nakayanan ang mga pinagsasabi nitong lalaking ito.

"What do you mean, "aggressive"? I was not." I pointed out.

Hindi niya pinansin yung sinabi ko.

"I wanted to meet you and talk to you properly this time. I even asked you for a meet-up, right? However, I did not push through introducing myself. I thought you would just be disappointed again."

Pagkatapos niyan ay huminga siya ng malalim. Ngayon, nagsisimula na siyang ngumiti ng kaunti habang nakatingin sa akin.

"I realized one thing though. Destiny ended my chase towards you. Destiny knew about my heart's pursuit. Without me , noticing, events happened and we got closer and closer and now you're my friend. I... did... want... to... jeopardize the friendship that I was praying for. Even though, I started to feel something for you."

I kept my eyes fixed on the floor as my heart started to beat faster. Unti-unting ng pumapasok sa sistema ko yung sinabi niya.

"I started feeling this. I can't exactly explain this. I just want you to pay your attention only to me. Now, I am risking it all. I can't take it anymore. I feel like I'll burst. That... I'll explode..."

Then, he spoke quietly.

"I know I might lose this friendship. I just want you to know about how I feel towards you. I am drawn to theyou speak. The way you roll your eyes. The way you perceive about things and the way you prioritize things..."

He sighed and closed his eyes. "That is all. You may go now."

He started walking to his car.

Sa unang pagkakataon, ngayon lang ako, walang maisip na gawin. Hindi ko alam kung ihahakbang ko ba iyong mga paa ko o mananatili lang ako dito. A thousand unkown emotions started to creep inside me. It's overwhelming and so powerful that I became disoriented for a minute.

"Edson!"

He turned around with surprised face.

"Gusto pa rin kitang kaibigan. I'll always look for your presence." I started.

Mula sa gulat niyang mukha, napalitan ito ng matigas na ekspresyon.

Pagkatapos ay lumambot ito.

"I understand, Mory." But, what striked me the most was his hurt and pained voice. I did not want that. My heart hurts too. I don't understand why.

"I'm glad that we can still be friends." Ngumiti siya ng tipid. I hated that.

Do I like him? Why am I feeling this way, then? How about Nickee?

"Si Nickee." Iyon lang ang nasabi ko.

"Nickee's just my friend. A family friend." He answered.

Kumunot ang nuo ko. Hindi ako naniniwala.

"Really. Her dad is planning to run as a Vice Mayor in the upcoming election. Well, Dad will run again. So, that explains why." Napangiti ako ng palihim doon.

Tapos unti unti siyang ngumisi.

"Why are you asking me this?"

"Wa--la lang. Nag-ta-taka lang ako." Nauutal kong sabi.

Tumango siya. "Okay, then. Well, I kind of like her though. She's pretty. Her family is acquinted with mine so."

Napairap ako. "You just said you like me. That, you feel something for me. Tapos, ito yung sinasabi mo ngayon."

"Well, I'm just saying..."

Without thinking any further. "You can only like me then. Hindi ko pa alam ang nararamdaman ko sa iyo. So, wait. Until I sort this out."

"W-hat? Just w-ha-t?" He shocking asked. Tapos, napakagat siya ng kanyang labi.

"Nasabi ko na. Aalis na ako."

Tumatawa na siya habang paalis ako.

"I'll court you then. Or I'll wait until you feelings for me grow."

"Bahala ka."

"I will."

The last thing I heard was his chuckle before I exited the the university.