overwhelming [m.h]

[ 1 ]

I sat on the border of my bed as I struggled to balance the guitar that sat on my lap, and the music sheets on my left hand. I was trying to figure out Blackbird by the Beatles, as the school talent show was approaching and my friend, Sam, insisted that we participated as it was out senior year. When they told me they had signed us up, without my knowledge, I almost ran them over with my non-existent car. Despite my mediocre guitar abilities that had shown to be not-so-mediocre over the years, I had a terrible fear of crowds, or more specifically, crowds looking at me.
So, naturally, I fought against Sam not to participate on the stupid show, but there was no changing their mind and "also, we were already registered so...".

"This won't do," I said as I carefully placed the guitar in its case and I stood up. I walked over to my closet and I jumped into some loose jeans and an old t-shirt I had, and walked out with my headphones plugged in. Fluorescent Adolescent by Arctic Monkeys. "I'm going for a quick walk, mum!" I yelled as I put on some sneakers and walked out.

Despite my attempt at disconnecting, I ended up following some young girls that were running in a direction of a park. There, a band was setting up for a small free concert. I walked into the crowd, still with my headphones in, as they finished prepping, and somehow I found my way almost in the front row. I took off my headphones as I realized they would soon begin to play, and the first note of some song began to be heard.

"This song's called Robbers. We're Drive Like I Do." The frontman of the band said and he began to sing. The people around me seemed to enjoy the music, almost as much as I did. For a minute it was almost as only the music and I existed. The loud banging of the drums and the guitar riff and the sweet voice of the vocalist all seemed to elope me in some sort of ecstasy I felt like I would never feel again. "You look so cool.... You look so cool..." Suddenly, we were back in our little Cheshire town, as the song came to a close, and I sighed. It all felt surreal, however, the moment that song played, I knew I needed it to be the anthem of my youth.

They played some covers and then some other original songs, and then said goodbye to the crowd. They walked out of the stage, while another band took over the previously played instruments, and I walked out of the crowd, plugging my headphones in again, fighting the urge to walk backstage to introduce myself to the band. I knew I still had to get Sam's song down, and the sun was getting ready to set.

Once I had been refreshed by the wonderful live music of that local band, I picked up my guitar and the song seemed to have gotten easier in the span of hours. Perhaps I was just burnt out. Anyways, that very same night I finished up the song and it was ready for next week's show. It was 1:02 in the morning when I was ready to go to sleep. My pillow and duvet seemed to be warmer than usual, so I just slipped right into sleepy town.

Monday morning, OutRight by Wild Party was the first thing I heard as I was stepping out of the warmth of my home and into the cold of the streets of Wilmslow. The walk to school wasn't long, it was only a couple of minutes, however it was worth it as I listened to my favorite "coming-of-age-film"- type music as I walked. I saw a group of four teenagers walking in front of me, they were laughing as they walked, probably also on their way to school. They laughed as if the cold of the autumn didn't even phase them. I sighed to my insides as I passed them and just prayed to all the gods two things: that they didn't laugh at me and that they didn't make some sort of dirty comment. Neither happened. They seemed to be in their own world.

As soon as I arrived into the school grounds, Sam was already with Den, our other friend, and they were both waiting for me so we could walk to class together. "Good morning, Mae!" Den greeted me enthusiastically, as I reached out my hand from my pocket to greet them from a small distance. "How was the guitar-ing? Are you almost ready? We have to practice." Nagged Sam as we walked inside, a small heat wave hitting us, contrasting with the previous cold of the streets. We walked towards a clutter of lockers, and I opened up mine, luckily, Den's was right next to mine. We talked about some nonsense as we walked into our classroom.
"By the way Sam, the song is almost ready. I just need us to practice together, so we can stay on tempo, but besides that it's done." I told them as I walked into our philosophy class, the professor taking out only then some books from his own bag and looking around the classroom. "Sure, if you want we can go to the music room during break." I nodded and sat in one of the front rows of the classroom, in order to pay proper attention to the class. Despite having mediocre grades in most of my classes, philosophy was the one class I couldn't get just right, for some reason it was just tiring for me, so I chose to sit away from distractions.
The lecture was going just fine, however they were small giggles coming from the back of the classroom, which seemed to annoy the professor, until he snapped. "Matthew, please move up to the front of the classroom." He said in his most stern voice possible, despite not being successful at all. A lanky, long haired boy sighed and walked to the desk next to mine, and I could already feel a migraine approaching rapidly. If he was joking around in the back of the class, nothing would stop him here, not even the presence of the prof.
"Oy, what are we doing right now?" He whispered to me, I rolled my eyes and looked at him. "Epicureanism" I answered, only to go back to the lecture as much as I could. There was a small thought nagging me, I've seen this kid elsewhere, not in class, but somewhere else. "Oh, okay." He replied, snapping me out of my thoughts for a minute. I saw how he took out a small back notebook from his book bag from my peripheral vision, and he began scribbling.