𝙽𝚞𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛 𝙽𝚎𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚋𝚘𝚛 || 𝐓𝐎𝐃𝐎𝐁𝐀𝐊𝐔

one

Bakugou
Hey there peasant.

Todoroki
peasant???? who's this?

Bakugou
Yes PeAsAnT.
and I'm your number neighbor.

Todoroki
what's that?

Bakugou
You live in a cave or something? It's a trend on Twitter.

Todoroki
what's twitter???

Bakugou
Please tell me your fucking joking.

Todoroki
i'm not capable of joking.

Bakugou
I-
don't even know what to say.
I'm speechless.

Todoroki
yeah- i have that effect on others.

Bakugou
Bitch- don't flatter yourself.

Todoroki
bitch? thought i was a peasant?

Bakugou
You're a bitchy peasant who also happens to be my number neighbor.

Todoroki
i still don't know what a number neighbor is??

Bakugou
A number neighbor is someone who has the same phone number as you, except the last digit is one lower or higher.

Todoroki
oh.
low key sounds weird.

Bakugou
How tf is it weird?

Todoroki
idk, not very fond of the idea of a random person texting my number. at first i thought you were the pizza man.

Bakugou
Why would the pizza man even text you??

Todoroki
to let me know that my pizza is on it's way??

Bakugou
The pizza man doesn't do that??

Todoroki
mines does.
his name is max.

Bakugou
Did I fucking ask?
Which reminds me, what's your name?

Todoroki
john cena.

Bakugou
Hey. I'm being fucking serious here.

Todoroki
sigh- fine.
my name is jeff.

Bakugou
I hate you.

Todoroki
i know- i hate me too.

Bakugou
Are you going to fucking tell me your name or not?

Todoroki
not with that attitude,
do you kiss your mother with that mouth?

Bakugou
Bold of you to assume I even kiss my mother. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth of yours?

Todoroki
bold of you to assume i even have a mother.

Bakugou
This got dark real quick-

Todoroki
just like the time i overdosed.

Bakugou
The fuck?

Todoroki
did i make you uncomfortable?

Bakugou
You took me by surprise- you suicidal or something?

Todoroki
nah man.

Bakugou
Did you just assume my gender?

Todoroki
shit.
my bad, i'm sorry.

Bakugou
Yeah you better be. Answer my question now dumbass.

Todoroki
i said nah??

Bakugou
Yeah well you better not fucking try killing yourself. I don't want my number neighbor dying.

Todoroki
you giving me orders now?

Bakugou
Yeah. So you better obey me.

Todoroki
kinky.
why can't i take my life tho?

Bakugou
Because I said so.

Todoroki
i'll listen only for now than.
my pizza came in, text you later.
dont want it to get cold.

Bakugou
Tfti 😤

Todoroki
😔🤙✌️🤟