Once And Always

Chapter 26

Early update!

Happy reading. 😆

+++++

Tee walked determinedly down to the stables the next morning and waited while a horse was saddled for him. His new black riding clothes was beautifully cut, with a tight, fitted jacket that accentuated his chest and narrow waist. The snowy white stock of his shirt set off his vivid coloring and high cheekbones, and his black hair dancing, blown by the wind.

He waited at the stables, idly tapping his riding crop against his leg; then he smiled brightly at the groom who led out a prancing gelding, its ebony coat shimmering like satin.

Tee gazed in admiring wonder at the magnificent horse. "He's beautiful, John. What's his name?"

"This here's Matador," the groom said. "He's from Spain. His lordship picked him for you to ride until your new horse gets here in a few weeks."

Tae had bought him a horse, Tee realized as the groom gave him a leg up into the saddle. He couldn't imagine why Tae had felt the need to buy another horse for him when his stable reportedly housed the finest horseflesh in Bangkok; still, it was a generous thing for him to do, and perfectly typical of the man not to bother mentioning it.

Tee slowed Matador to a walk as they turned up the steep, winding lane that led to Captain Mew's house and breathed a sigh of relief when the Captain stepped out onto the porch to help him down from the saddle. "Thank you," he said when his feet were safely on the ground. "I was hoping you'd be here."

Captain Mew grinned at him. "I intended to ride over to the mansion today, to see for myself how you and Tae were coming along."

"In that case," Tee said with a sad smile, "it's just as well you didn't put yourself to the trouble."

"No improvement?" the captain said in surprise, ushering him into his house. He filled a kettle with water for tea and put it over the fire.

Tee sat down and morosely shook his head. "If anything, things are worse. Well, not worse, exactly. At least Tae stayed home last night instead of going to Bangkok and visiting his, er . . . well, you know what I mean," he said. He hadn't planned on such an intimate topic. He only wanted to discuss Tae's mood, not their most personal relationship.

Captain Mew took two cups from a shelf and glanced over his shoulder, his expression perplexed. "No, I don't. What do you mean?"

Tee gave him an acutely uneasy look.

"Out with it, child. I confided in you. You must know you can confide in me. Who else can you talk to?"

"No one," Tee said miserably.

"If what you're trying to say is as difficult as that, suppose you think of me as your father—or Tae's father."

"You aren't either one. And I'm not certain I could tell my own father what you're asking."

Captain Mew put the teacups down and turned slowly, watching him across the room. "Do you know the only thing I dislike about the sea?" When Tee shook his head, Mew continued, "The solitude of my cabin. Sometimes I enjoy it. But when I'm worried about something—like a bad storm I can feel brewing—there's no one I can confide my fears to. I can't let my men know I'm afraid or they'll panic. And so I have to keep it bottled up inside of me, where the fear grows all out of proportion. Sometimes I'd be out there and I'd get a feeling my husband was ill or in peril, and the feeling would haunt me because there was no one there to reassure me that I was being foolish. If you can't talk to Tae and you won't talk to me, then you'll never find the answers you're looking for."