Jealous {Ongoing}

Mummy

Today was first day of college I just couldn't wait, I've always wanted to be a singer my mum was my role model. I still remember how every night she would come to my room and sing with her melodious voice, I really love it, she has an angelic smile and the way she sings is always from her heart she sings with joy. and I guess that's one of the most qualities I love about her, I so miss my mum a lot it just makes me sad that she's gone how she suffered from her disease but I am happy for her that she's in a better place.

This feeling I get that my mom is gone is a very bad feeling I just don't want to face the reality, that my mum is gone I am not ready to face it, anyone that sees me will think I have a very happy life with a rich father and all. but that's not the case I am not happy at all about my mum's death. I know I keep saying this on and on but I won't stop, because I know that I am messed up.

"Mummy sing for me please" I was really sleepy but I couldn't go to bed if I don't hear my mum sing my mum was teaching me how to sing I really love her

My mum sighed and went over to the side of my bed raking her fingers through my hair "one day you won't ask me to sing for you"

"What do you mean mummy?" I asked confused

"One day sweetie, I will be up there watching you as you sing"

"But mummy how will you be up there when you are already here?"

My mum smiled sadly but that's not the smile I knew "everyone was has a Time to come for them to be up there, that's why I want to teach you everything you know before I go up there" she said pointing up.

"But mummy when you go up there will I be able to see you?"

My mum took a photo that was on my nightstand, it was a picture of her that I love keeping there, she looked at it adoringly "Emily if you ever need me just call out to me and I will listen, when you grow up you will understand what I am talking about, don't cry when I go up there instead be grateful that your mummy is happy where she is don't look back go for your dreams, sing till your hearts content and take care of your father.." she faltered and a tear fell from her eyes

"Mummy why are you crying? I don't understand what you are saying"

She kissed my head and began singing, my eyes became heavy as I slept off.

"Are you okay?" I looked up to see Jason sitting on my bed my face was flooded with tears and I was hugging a picture I looked down at the picture to see my mum smiling, oh how I love that smile I traced her face and closed my eyes "she looks really beautiful just like you" I cried more remembering my mum "don't flatter yourself just because I said you are beautiful" he said with a chuckle

I know he was trying to cheer me up but I couldn't hold myself. I couldn't pretend like I was fine anymore, I am tired of being strong, I am tired of holding back my tears, I am just tired, I cleaned my tears with the back of my hands "i--i am fine"

"No you are not, am really sorry"

I shook my head "there's no need she's already gone" to be very honest, I don't get why people say sorry to someone when they are hurting, it doesn't make things any better, but it makes it worse, it's like they are pitying you, and it just makes you want to cry.

He placed a hand on my shoulder making me tense "you should know your mum is really proud of you"

I sniffed and I could see my vision getting watery as I cried again "no no don't cry I am not really good at this" he muttered to himself making me chuckle.

I know this guy wasn't good at this he stood up and stretched his hands "you need to get ready for college"

I nodded as he was about to leave and close the door I called him "Jason"

He turned back with a raised eyebrows "yeah?"

"Thanks" he smiled

"No problem" he said as he left the room.

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Jason POV

I was going to the kitchen when I heard someone crying I seriously hated the sound of people crying, it's like a cat, disturbing someone at night.

I walked closer to find out it was from Emily room, she was actually crying I thought it was because she thought I used her the other day, so I walked closer and saw her in deep thoughts her face flooded with tears she was hugging a picture close to her chest I walked to her room thinking she will yell at me, but she didn't seem to notice me she looked lost, I waved my hand in front of her face still no movement only the crying I could hear. I looked closer to see it was a woman she looked just like Emily but she had brown eyes.

Maybe it was her mum I really liked this girl but she keeps on annoying me and pushing me away, I just can't see her cry even though she had the guts to punch me, I just can't see her hurt, her hair was falling on her face her blue eyes turned dark blue she looked miserable. If only she could like me like how I lik-no love her everything will be perfect she really loves her mum so much. I had the urge to just pull her in my arms.

This girl looks, broken and sad, just like how I looked when I found out how my mum was suffering because of my so called father.

I sighed I couldn't take her crying anymore don't get me wrong she is really annoying but awesome and beautiful, I am just tired, of how she treats me

"Are you okay?" I asked without thinking.

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Sorry this chapter is really short I will try to make it longer next time

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