DARK SOUL'S: The Story You Started

ISHITA

I can’t believe he said that to me!

I already have a pile of work to do with this frustration, also not to skip my crazy thoughts and panic attacks, It was an intimation to him about If's. I’m not sure about myself now, I don’t think I’m in a right shape.
I knew if Mr. Siraj will get to know that, I’ll be in trouble but what’s a big deal if we are under-confident about something.
We all usually don’t have superman’s power with Einstein’s brain, and well Mr. Siraj knows me well, he’ll understand my reasons, he always has been!
I really had troubled to get attention into the work, my head’s pounding like a maniac, and suddenly my office doors burst open....
He looks pissed as hell I’m sure his dad told him.
Here We Go!!!
But what the hell with his language and who the hell he think he is?
He placed his finger on my painful nerve.
I dropped down on my seat and placed my hands on my face, I wanted to scream, I wanted to shout after him, I wanted to cry but I couldn’t.
My throat is clenching, Am I running away from the things? Yes! maybe I am but it feels really painful when you realized what reality is!
Was Mr. Siraj trying to tell me the same thing this whole time? And I never once understood what was he saying!
I embrace myself tightly, No need to make any call to anyone right now, but sure I’ll have to make an appointment with my therapist as soon as possible, But on phone will it be possible Oh God!!
I have never felt so helpless in my life, Sure I had a past and he throws that thing on my face, How dare he!
I thought he helped me that day,  And there’ll be no harm if I just tell him the truth. I don’t want him to think what was wrong with me and he’ll be in trouble thinking that! Guess What!  I was wrong in there, God knows what I was thinking?
People always use our weaknesses against us, and that’s what happened to me! I wish I had never opened my mouth. There were so many things I want back, But they’ll never come back to me.
I make up my mind and called Dr. Rutuja my therapist back in Mumbai, I need help to sort it out.
“ Look who called me, Ishita it’s been like forever since you called me” Yeah there is no “hello” No “Hi” and no greeting formalities, I always love her with this attitude.
“ Yeah Dr. Rutuja, sorry, I’m in the US now, so I haven’t called you”
“ Well, that’s nice! big girl! But What happened? You seem upset” She inquired and that’s when there, I couldn’t hold my tears back.
“ Hey, You are a strong woman, why are you crying tell me what happened” I can’t say anything, My voice choked.
“ Well calm down,, close your eyes and try to take a deep breaths” I followed as she said. “ Yeah, that’s nice, feeling better! ” I felt better after a few minutes.
“ Yeah, Sorry!” I muttered
“ Are naa, sang ata mla kay zal te_Now tell me what happened? She inquired again.
“ As usual, I’m having nightmares frequently now, but their intensity is not as high as they were earlier, But I felt so helpless in here, It’s like someone’s stabbing in my heart and twisting it to increase that pain intensity,  I need your help” I plead her.
She paused for a while, before saying a word, “ Hmm, You need to visit personally but as you're in the US, I knew someone in there, He was my friend back in college in Calcutta and practicing in there now, I’ll call him and will send you the number okay! No need to worry you’ll be fine!, But careful ha! he’s a bit weird and flirty as well” She warned and I nod. I think I’ll cope with that but at least there’s someone in here.
After a few minutes, she sent me a number Dr. Phill, I googled him and thankfully he’s practicing in New York. I’ll call him today.
First thing, Work! I don’t care about anyone in here.
I didn’t see Ethan’s whole time in office anywhere.
I called Dr. Phill on my way back home in the evening, It’s Friday today so It’ll be possible to see him tomorrow or Sunday if he has some spare time for me.
“ Hello” He received my call after a couple of rings.
“ Dr. Phill” I enquired
“ Yes speaking, who’s that gorgeous voice” He flirts,
Damn, He’s already,
“ Dr. Phil, it’s Ishita, Dr. Rutuja gave me your number, I need to see you as early as possible and need an appointment if you are available” I rushed.
“ Oh! Yes beautiful, She called me earlier, I was expecting your call” I rolled my eyes, it’ll be difficult with him.
“ Oh so when will I have to come? I mean..” He cut me off in a mid-sentence.
“ Just wait huh, Let. Me. Check. My. Schedule.” He emphasizes each word and I heard keyboard noise from his side,
“ Yes, Ishu You can come tomorrow by two Okay, You do have my address right? “ Ishu! Seriously, he said that. I can’t believe it. 
“ Yes, I have. I’ll see you tomorrow then”
“ Yes babes! waiting for you already, Byeee!!
I hung up, I was already in my apartment lobby and I need to take some rest. I ate and prayed for sleep. Thankfully it came.