Waiting Four You

Chapter 38 (Tobias)

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you," I growl after Tris leaves the dorm.

At least Al has the decency to look ashamed.

"What does it matter to you?" he asks in a sheepish voice.

The question itself reminds me that he was the only "friend" of Tris who didn't know about us. To be honest, I don't really care who knows anymore.

"Haven't you figured it out yet?" I ask gruffly. "Christina figured it out before stage one even ended."

His eyes widen as he snaps his head up. "You! You're the mysterious fiancé!?"

The confusion and guilt on his face give way to fear. Good.

"Let's go," I say grabbing his arm roughly.

I drag him to my office and send out a message to James. He responds immediately.

Twenty minutes later, there is a knock at the door. When I open it, James strides in. He takes one look at Al before turning to me.

"You said it was urgent," is the first thing my grandfather says.

I point to the boy sitting across from me. "He just admitted to being Peter's other accomplice."

James's eyes go wide. I know he recognizes that Al was supposed to be one of Tris's friends.

I already have the papers ready, James just has to sign them, and Al will be joining Peter and Drew.

"Why?" James asks the boy.

Why is he delaying this? I want to get things over with so that I can get back to her.

Al mumbles something unintelligible.

"You have to speak up," my grandfather demands.

"I don't know," Al replies.

"That's not good enough," James growls at the boy. "You betrayed your friend. She stood up for you, and you betrayed her. She stood in front of a target as knives were thrown at her head to protect you. And how do you repay her? You repay that friendship by helping someone to hurt her."

I don't know where my grandfather is planning on going with this, but I'm getting the distinct impression that he doesn't plan on signing the boy off to the factionless.

"Don't you think I already know that?" Al asks. "Don't you think the guilt has been eating away at me every waking moment and even most of the sleeping ones?"

I think I'm starting to get it. He wants to make sure Al lives with his guilt for the rest of his life, and leaving Dauntless won't do that. Leaving Dauntless will make it so the boy will most likely forget. Forget what he did to end up there. Forget what it feels like to feel guilty of betrayal.

To an extent, I like the idea, except that would mean that Al would still have the chance to talk to Tris. He would still have the chance to see her, and she would see him. His presence would torment her.

"I already have the papers ready to send kick him out of Dauntless," I say into the silence that follows Al's statement.

My grandfather waves me away. "No, he will stay here and remember what he did until the end of initiation. He doesn't have enough points to stay anyway," he says. "I want him to remember for the next few days exactly what he did.

"I don't want him near her," I growl.

I'm already angry enough at the fact that he has been able to see and speak to her all this time.

James comes around my desk and places a calming hand on my shoulder. "I know, Four. But initiation is almost over, and we don't need you kicking three people out in less than a month. He will be gone in a couple days anyway."

"Take him back to the dorm!" I yell as I storm out of my own office.

I instantly feel bad for yelling at him, but I'm too angry to care.

As I make my way back to my apartment, everyone gives me a wide berth as if afraid of my wrath raining down on them. I'm not that scary, an I?

As I go to open the door, I do my best to calm my features. Tris is guaranteed to be stressed enough, and I don't need to add to it.

"Is he gone?" Tris asks as soon as I enter.

I groan. "James wouldn't sign it. He said that with initiation almost over, and the fact that Al doesn't have enough points to stay, that he'll be gone after the fear landscapes anyway."

I can see the pain on her face. Walking to the couch, I scoop her into my arms and just hold her as she crys into my shoulder.

"I don't want to see him," she chokes out between sobs.

"Do you want to just stay here?" I ask. "I can bring your meals here, like I've already been doing."

She nods into my shoulder, and I carry her over to the bed to lay down with her. It isn't long before her sobs slowly die into hiccups as she drifts off to sleep.

The next morning, I wake to the sounds of someone pounding at my door. I'm actually surprised to see Tris still asleep, and do my best not to wake her as I get up to answer the door.

Christina is on the other side with tears filling her eyes. "Where's Tris?"

She's panicking, and I let her in to see that her friend is still sleeping peacefully.

"What's wrong?" I ask her. Obviously something is bothering the normally smiling and chatty initate.

"It's Al," she replies sniffling.

My face hardens at the mention of the boy.

Christina is surprised by my expression as well as a little scared.

"What about that filth?" I growl.

"Woah," she exclaims. I forgot that she doesn't know about his conversation with Tris yesterday.

I tell Christina about what was revealed yesterday, and her sad, shocked eyes change over to a hardened anger.

"I can't believe him!" she exclaims once I finish explaining.

"What were you coming to tell Tris?" I ask as I hear the familiar sound of her feet hitting the floor in a mad dash to the bathroom.

She takes a deep breath. "They just pulled him out of the Chasm. He jumped sometime last night."

I grow cold. Even though he hurt her, I know that this is going to devastate Tris. She has too much empathy, too much selflessness.

Christina dismisses herself figuring that I would handle telling Tris.

I stand and head to the bathroom to find her in the usual morning position. Hopefully this part ends soon. I wish I knew more about pregnancy to know what to do to make things easier on her.

When she sits up and looks at me, I see the tears streaming down her face. That's all I need to see to know that she heard what her friend had told me.

"Are you okay?" I ask her with concern.

I take her in my arms and carry her to the couch.

"Do you think it would have made a difference if I had forgiven him?" she asks me.

"The guilt was eating him up inside," I respond calmly. "I don't think anything could have prevented this."

I don't really believe that, and part of me, the more ruthless part, is glad that he's gone, glad that his presence can't torment her anymore.

I take her face in my right hand and tilt it so that she's looking into my eyes. Leaning in, I kiss her slowly, softly. I try to convey as much reassurance as I can into the kiss.

"You know I haven't brushed my teeth yet, right?" she jokes half-heartedly.

I press my lips to hers again. "I don't care," I reply against her mouth.