Summer of 2012 (CVS # 1)

PROLOGUE

I tried my best to sit down even though my head hurt so much. I'm sure it's her despite the fact that my vision was blurry.

"I'll be here until your sister arrives." Her voice was mellifluous, it sounded like angels were singing every time she spoke. It is her.

The moment I got my normal vision back, I stared at her. She's changed. It's been.. what? 7? 8 years?

Her hair was short and it was ash gray unlike before when she had waist length hair with its natural brown color. She stared at her Calvin Klein bag with sharp eyes and eyebrows furrowed. I guess she's getting impatient staying in the same room with me.

Hinawakan ko ang kaliwang mata ko at napangiti. She moved her head my way and I swear I almost forgot how to breathe for a moment. Her beauty was ineffable. Agad din niyang iniwas ang tingin at naglabas ng mga papel at binasa ang mga ito.

Hindi ko tinanggal ang tingin sa kaniya, hindi ko alam kung kailan ko ulit siya matitignan ng ganito. Baka panaginip lang ito? Kung panaginip lang 'to, ayaw ko nang magising.

"Y-you came back.. Ry.." Halos pabulong kong sinabi ang pangalan na ako lang ang tumatawag sa kaniya noon. Tumingin ako sa pagkain na dala niya at hinintay ang magiging sagot niya.

"Yes, but not for you." Matigas na sambit niya habang patuloy na nagbabasa ng mga papel. Nanatili akong tahimik, ganoon din siya. Her smile was very special, she doesn't smile that much, but if she does then she's surely happy. Kaya akala ko noon wala ng mas sasakit pa na makita siyang ngumiti na ang rason ay hindi na ako. Mas masakit pala ang marinig na hindi para sa'kin ang pagbabalik niya.

I can feel the pain piercing into my heart. My eyes were teary. Thank God, I held them back.

"It wasn't me! Why couldn't you listen to me?" Of course I didn't say that. I don't have the guts to. I lost her the moment I let her step out of Cagayan.

"What should I do for you to forgive me?" Sambit ko kahit pa nanginginig ang boses ko sa kaba. I stared at my hands, waiting for her to respond, but it didn't come so I tried to start a conversation again.

"Nakita mo nang umiyak ako ng dugo, oh.." I joked, trying to make the atmosphere less heavy, but she still didn't respond. Is it so hard to talk to me? Is it so hard to take a glance at me?

Nag bukas ang pinto at bakas sa mukha ni Ate ang pag-aalala. Tumingin siya sa 'kin ngunit lumipat din sa kaharap ko ngayon. Bahagya siyang nagulat.

"Are you okay?—" Agad kong pinutol ang sasabihin niya dahil panigurado ng walang tigil na naman ito.

"Oo, Ate—"

"I'm not talking to you Jairus! Avery, are you alright?" What? I'm the patient here! I'm your brother!

She stood up and started to fix her things. Ni hindi man lang lumapat ang tingin niya kay Ate nang dumating ito. Does she hate me that much?

All those years when she was gone, I asked myself.. What if that didn't happen? What if I came earlier on that day? Many questions were running through my mind. Doubts and regrets were on my heart. I don't know the answers, but I would know if I chased her, if only I didn't let her go that day.

I prayed for her to come back even if it wasn't for me. I prayed for her to come my way, even if the roads were tough. I prayed for her to come back into my arms, even though it was quite impossible. I won't let her go ever again if the world gives me another chance.

I stared at her, still fixing her things. Please, give me another chance. Please, let me love you again. This time, I'll prove to you that you're the only one I've always been into. Lord, hear me.. please.

Pinihit ni Ate ang doorknob at binuksan ang pinto para kay Avery. May sinabi ito kay Ate pero hindi ko na narinig dahil sa hina. She took a glance at me and took something out from her bag. She threw her business card on the hospital bed before going out.

Kinuha ko ito agad sa dulo ng kama kahit masakit pa ang katawan. Ngumiti ako. Pinakinggan na rin sa wakas ang matagal ko ng ipinagdadasal.

Avery Lacuesta Velasquez, I won't let you go. This time, I'll love you more than this world can offer.