Suicidal Todoroki x Midoriya | What it Means to Love

45 | Love Breaks Hearts

Shoto Todoroki

At a relatively late hour at Yaoyorozu's mansion, Bakugou approaches me in a black sweatshirt and black shorts. He waggles his index finger at me, motioning for me to follow him. I nod with slight skepticism swimming through my head, but I swiftly dismiss and perish the unease gnawing at me by regaining my composure.

Upwardly drawing myself from my futon, I gently lift Midoriya's arms from on top of me and lay them on the floor once I've maneuvered myself free. Flicking on a flame from my left forefinger, I utilize the meager light to guide myself out from the web of students strewn across the floor.

The TV is still glowing with blue light as its rapidly moving animations play across the screen. Only Bakugou, Kaminari, and I are still awake. Kaminari, however, is on the verge of falling asleep; he's staring at the television screen, but his eyelids are drooping and his head is nodding down before jerking back up.

Bakugou silently guides me through the vast, unfamiliar hallways of Yaoyorozu's mansion until we reach the kitchen. Once we arrive, he glances at the massive chrome-colored fridge towering up against the wall and opens it up, which emits a blinding blue light into the darkness of the kitchen. With a glare, he shoves a bowl of cold soba into my hands and brusquely taps his foot against the floor.

I stifle a grimace. Today, eating has repulsed me more than usual. I managed to hold down the sushi, but I was on the verge of throwing up. I ate only a few pieces. I truly am a disgrace.

"Ya ain't leavin' this kitchen until you finish," he hisses, placing his hands on his hips. "You're way too skinny, Todoroki. God, losing thirty-two pounds? No one noticed a damn thing, either, huh?" The corner of his lip fidgets as it peels upwards.

I do not understand why this matters so much to you. My health should be trifling to you. "I'm fine. But I suppose not. That is, however, until you noticed."

With eyes of ruby irate, he spits, "Hell no. Don't try to tell me you're fine when you obviously aren't. Now, for the love of God, fucking eat." He opens his mouth to speak, but he swiftly closes it, seemingly scolding his efforts.

Staring distantly at the ground, I begin to eat the soba Bakugou handed to me. In spite of my body tensing and my mind blatantly asserting its disapproval of my actions, I somewhat swiftly scoop up the noodles and force myself to swallow them, although this isn't without excruciating effort.

Bakugou firmly pats his hand against my back, cognizant of my multiplicity of wounds. "You better not be droppin' dead on my watch. I don't have a damn clue why you refuse to eat, but you're treating yourself like shit—and that makes me feel like shit."

Tch. It seems my body is unable to handle mere soba noodles. Having finished the bowl of soba, I feel utterly abysmal on the inside. "I've finished, as you requested. Now, if you do not mind—"

Denying me an exit from the kitchen, Bakugou steps in front of me with an acerbic scowl. "Quick to leave, eh? Am I not good enough for your time?" He squints his eyes in the shadow of night.

"That is not the case. You would do well to refrain from stating your assumptions." I cannot continue to fend this off without revealing any warning signs. "I simply wish to return to Midoriya." My fingers start to involuntarily twitch as my arms stiffen like planks of wood.

"That so? Tch. Believe it or not, but your damn life is one helluva lot more important than sleeping next to that nerd. You can't even love him anymore if you're dead. Look, I still don't know all the hell you've been through, but..." My eyes widen at the revelation Bakugou presents to me. "Yeah. They're old news now, but if you think I'm completely blind, then you've got that damn wrong. It's not the same as what you need to work on now, but many of the same principles still apply. Recovery ain't immediate, but you'll only get there if you try. Not saying you're not trying, but these kinds of battles are the ones you have against yourself. I get it. It's hard to heal when you hate yourself.