tea - dreamnotfound

you need a mint

i'm in the middle of streaming on the dream team smp server when someone rings the doorbell. who could possibly wanna talk to me? dream isn't coming until tomorrow, right? puzzled, i tell my viewers to hold on, turning off my face cam. i rush towards the front door, not wanting to leave the person outside waiting even though it's probably just some jehovah's witness.

when i get a look at the man standing in the hallway my confusion only grows. he's from one of those gift delivery companies, the ones where you can send flowers to your old sick grandma or whatever. he picks up a box of chocolates, handing them to me and saying they were sent by someone calling themselves "dream". i lock the door behind him as he hastily leaves.

i'm stood in my fairly empty hallway that now just feels even emptier. dream sent me these? i feel flattered, my cheeks turning a slight pink color. that's adorable. but at the same time, i can't bear looking at the box in my hands. it's disgusting. a thoughtful gift, but disgusting.

i quickly throw it onto the kitchen counter, hurrying into my bedroom to resume the stream. i sit down, taking a deep breath before switching my face cam on again. the chat greets me warmly as i pick up from where i left off, trying to act like everything's fine.

sapnap joins the teamspeak for a while, but he only manages to keep me entertained for another 30 minutes before i seriously start to get tired of being the center of attention. i abruptly end the stream, telling chat and sapnap goodnight. i'll just talk to him later.

the only thing that could calm me down and distract me at this point is a couple episodes of happy tree friends. ironic, but it works wonders. i switch the lights in the kitchen on since it's pitch black outside, and first thing my eyes are greeted with is the shining red box of chocolate.

i try my best to ignore it and continue on to the living room but my legs won't move. one piece couldn't hurt, right? i deserve it, i tell myself as i approach and pick it up. i've been working hard this entire week, streaming and coding. and besides, i've had nothing else to eat, so one can't hurt.

i cover myself with two blankets, leaning into the comforting couch. it's pretty cold in my apartment. the catchy intro of happy tree friends is playing on the tv in front of me as i carefully peel the annoying plastic on the box open. the lovely smell of the sweets hit me as soon as i figure it out.

i pick out one of them, sticking it in my mouth and enjoying the sweet taste. i've almost forgotten what chocolate tastes like. side note; it's delicious. one piece turns into two, and two into three. i get carried away as i watch the show closely. the next time i look down to grab another piece i notice they're all gone. that's when i realize. i've devoured the entire fucking box.

my heart starts racing as i scramble to look for the nutritional value of the stupid thing. i can't read it because of the shitty lighting in the room, so instead i throw the box onto to the floor in a panic, sprinting to the bathroom to look myself in the mirror. my hands are shaking, my breathing is shaky.

what i see in the mirror is an ugly, fucked up mess. i am an ugly fucked up mess. because look who has fucked up again. i feel nauseous. i feel hot tears starting to run down my cheeks. i want to rip my stomach out. i can't even bear looking at myself in the mirror anymore. i can't ruin my perfect diet like this, not like this.

time skip as this part is too triggering <3

i pop a mint like nothing's happened. but i don't feel better, not at all.

as i lay down in my bed i get a notification. it's a message from dream. usually i would smile and be happy over his attention, but this time i don't feel a thing.

dream 💕
did you like my surprise???

i slowly type out a response.

george
i loved it <3