Love Is Black And White

16. Wines and Truths

Across the street from the gallery entrance, I saw Emma. She looked at her watch, ran her hand over her skirt and then looked around.

"Hey!" She said when she saw me, crossing the street.

I approached her, and after a quick look from her feet to her head, I smiled, "You look beautiful."

She sighed, "Thank you... Shall we?" She gestured to the gallery door.

I smiled, and walked beside her to the door. Emma entered before, and abruptly stopped after a few steps.

"Oh my God!" She said, and looked at me with wide eyes and tight lips to hold a laugh.

I frowned, confused at first. I didn't understand her reaction until I looked around the place, and my eyes also opened wide.

There was nudity everywhere.

"A lot of... Naked people." Emma said, holding back laughter.

"Emma!" A smiling man, holding a glass of wine, hugged her. He was wearing a shiny shirt with the first buttons open, his beard and eyebrows, so well made, looked like makeup on his face, "I'm glad you came!"

"I wouldn't miss it!" Emma said, "Leon, this is Peter, the photographer... Peter, this is Leon."

I greeted him with a smile, and he pulled me into a hug.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," he said, with his hand on his waist, "I didn't know you were coming with somebody, Emma." Peter said to her, and she smiled, "This must be a little embarrassing for a first date," he laughed, "but that's exactly the intention here... Make people feel comfortable with nudity. After all, it's natural. Nudity, like sexuality, is just taboo."

"Yes, you're right." Emma said, "Our eyes just need to get used to it."

"That's one of the reasons we serve wine, darling." Peter responded with conviction, and then called a waiter who was standing next to us, with glasses of wine. With a gesture and a smile, he invited us to take a glass, "I present to you..." He said, raising his glass for a toast, "The best taboo-breaker!"

Laughing, we toasted with him.

In a place full of taboo, and full of wine, we didn't even experience the usual embarrassment of the first date. The word inhibition was not appropriate for that night. The night we spent about an hour admiring nude photos of other people. People we've never seen. People who somehow seemed so close to us. Not because of their bare skin, but because of their looks, the way they managed to convey their feelings.

My concept of intimacy was gradually changing that night.

"I noticed something today." Emma said, when we were sitting on the couch in her apartment, at the end of the night, "Your cheeks turn red when you drink wine... Or you're embarrassed."

"I don't think there's any more embarrassment between us." I joked.

She laughed, "Good." She smiled and slowly brought her face close to mine.

I smiled, and realizing the intention was reciprocal, she kissed me.

There were kisses and soft touches, which became desirous and sensual. It was invigorating. We were both half drunk and not thinking straight, but certain of what we wanted.

In the heat of the moment, I felt her hand on my abdomen. Moved by a greater force, I pulled my body away from hers.

"What?" She asked, startled, "What happened?"

I took a deep breath, not sure what exactly had happened, "I'm sorry." I said, confused.

What the hell am I doing?

"I have to tell you something." No longer commanded by my sober conscience, I was getting ready to tell Emma about the frustrating state of my feelings. But before I said anything, she smiled and shook her head.

"You men are all the same." She said, "Let me guess..." She frowned, mocking, "You don't want to get involved, because you want to enjoy your young life..." She spoke with irony, "Or you used to be a romantic guy until someone broke your heart... Or you're afraid of feelings because you love too much... Which one are you? Because I already met them all."

I waited a few seconds to speak, and she waited for my answer, frowning.

"I'm in love with a girl." I started, and she stopped frowning, "I didn't want to get involved with you without telling you that."

"Oh," she sighed, and looked away, "I'm sorry..." She bit her lip and frowned again, "Did you date her?" She asked, and I shook my head in denial, "She doesn't know, does she?"

"No." I replied, and laid my head on the back of the sofa, next to hers, the two of us with vacant looks at the ceiling.

"Yeah, I bet she would date you if she knew." She smiled, "Why didn't you tell? What happened?" She looked at me.

I shrugged, "Life."

She sighed and looked up again, "Life always happens..."

I felt more and more connected to Emma. That's how I understood the secret to intimacy: wines and truths. They work so well together. They even boost themselves. The more we drink wine, the more we tell truths. The more we tell truths, the more we drink wine. As a positive feedback process.

After a few seconds of thoughtful silence, she started to laugh.

"What?" I asked, confused.

"It was such a fun night... And now look at us." She said, smiling, "We are two melancholy souls, we cannot avoid these deep conversations... It's stronger than us."

I laughed with her, "This is my favorite type, you know?" I said, smiling, "Good conversations at the end of fun nights."

She smiled, and we returned to silence for a few more seconds.

"Leon..." She said, and looked at me, "What do you want?"

I thought for a moment, the simple but difficult question: What do I want?

I took a deep breath, "I want to move on," I said in a sigh of relief.

In silence, she stared at me for a few more moments, and then smiled. I gently slid my hand over her face, brought it up to mine, and kissed her lips.

The meeting of the two melancholy souls who found each other. It was supposed to happen. But no one knew they would become that intimate.

Intimacy is not about how much time people spend together, it's about how souls understand each other. And much more than that. The intimacy of a touch between naked bodies is not even comparable to the intimacy of a connection between naked souls.

Blame the wines and the truths.