Conversations Between Moon And The Sunshine Kid (Mighty Boosh One-shot Book)

Hide and seek.

Synopsis: Set in a dystopian future. To solve overpopulation, society is split into two groups, distinguished by a coloured stripe on the face. Seekers hunt and hiders are hunted. A hider joins the resistance.

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"Are you sure they're here?" Howard asked, pulling up his mask

"Bainbridge said there's a 'resistance' here, about 7 or 8 Hiders."

"Resistance? That sounds dangerous" Howard mumbled

"They are, there are branches of the resistance all over. They're hiders that hunt seekers" they explained.

"Why'd Bainbridge send us out then? This is so unfair."

"They're high-class targets. We're talking €30,000 each."

Howard raised an eyebrow in disbelief "That's like 6 times a normal hider, are you sure this is legit?"

Another seeker piped up "Leroy got one, and he got like 40%"

Howard sighed. "Well, money talks. Let's get this over with"

The seeker nodded and kicked the door in. There was instantly commotion and yelling, and before long, shots from a raygun.

Howard, aiming his raygun and approaching the house.

The house had already been semi-trashed, the sofa was flipped over and a seeker was on the floor, dead.

Howard was shocked when he saw one of his friends on the ground, but kept going, climbing up the stairs.

The house seemed surprisingly empty, but there was fighting coming from a room at the end of the hall. He decided to investigate.

Before he could take a step forward, his gun was knocked from his hand and he was being kicked down the stairs by a pair of (particularly sharp) stiletto heels.

He didn't get that badly hurt but was winded and dizzy.

The person that kicked him came down the stairs and pointed a sword at his neck, but after a second, he pulled it away.

"Holy shit- Howard?!" They gasped, stepping back.

"Vince?" Howard slurred breathlessly, equally in shock.

Vince pulled down his mask, revealing a blue stripe along his left cheek (signalling he was a hider) and a black stripe along his right cheek (signalling he was in the resistance).

"What are you doing here?" He pulled off Howard's mask, revealing a red stripe on the right side of his face.

He jumped back, steading his hand on the sword "You're a seeker?!"

"You're in the fucking resistance?! Do you know how dangerous that is?! People would pay thirty thousand euros for your dead body"

"I'd rather fight back than get hunted like a rabbit." He shot back.

Howard stood up, met with Vince's sword aimed at his neck

He stepped back, realising he was unarmed

"Vince, you were my best friend before all this. I couldn't kill you, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. Please, just put the sword down." He reasoned

"I know you can't kill me, I disarmed you. Did you really think I'd kick you down the stairs if you had a gun?"

He stepped back again "You aren't gonna kill me, are you?"

He hesitated, lowering the sword a little

"I... I can't do that" he sighed "I'm supposed to, but I can't do that to you."

"Vince... Thank you" he sighed with relief

Go away, Howard. You wanted to kill us. I don't want to be an exception. Just piss off, Howard."

Howard nodded, a little hurt.

"Vince, I'm sorry." He sighed and left, quickly walking out of the house, before turning back to look at the house.

Vince was stood at the doorway, watching him leave with a disappointed expression.

Howard sighed. But couldn't help himself. He walked over to Vince and pulled him into a hug.

"Howard! What the fuck are you playing at?!" He gasped, stumbling back and dropping his sword.

"I'm not gonna hurt you, Vince. I just missed you" he explained.

Vince relaxed a little, hugging back "I missed you too, Howard."

Howard smiled gently, pulling away.

Vince sighed "We can't do this Howard. You're a seeker."

"We're just friends, so why does it matter?"

"It's the principle. It's like a fox being friends with a rabbit- well, a rabbit with a sword"

"Well, I don't want to kill any hiders, it's just my job"

"To kill people like me" he pointed out

"I know... But what if I joined the resistance?"

"But how? Everyone here would kill you with no hesitation" Vince pointed out, surprised at the suggestion.

"How did you get the black stripe?"

"When you kill a seeker it just sort of appears."

"So what would happen if I killed a seeker?"

"You might get one?" He suggested.

"Maybe," he nodded "but how will I know?"

"Well, there's only one way to find out"

There was thinking upstairs, and muffled shouting.

Howard heeded this as warning "I should go before your friends see me. But I'll come back tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay" he nodded "stay safe, Howard," he said softly, tossing him his raygun.

"I'll try my best" he offered a smile, before turning away and walking back to the car.

He took a minute to think, sat alone in his car. He planned his next moves. He'd declare his friends dead, and try and convince a colleague to drive him home. When he got there, he'd shoot them.

He knew it was drastic to risk everything for Vince, but he'd been pretty desensitised to murder. He wanted to win Vince back, and was willing to do that through any means necessary. As sappy as it was to admit it, he missed his little man.