When It Comes To Love- A Hermitcraft Fanfiction (Book 2)

Do I Look Like a Diamond to You?

Joe's POV (JoeHillsSays)

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I heard about what happened to Keralis' base, and how Zedaph had returned. I was certainly glad that one of our dear friends had come back to us, but I couldn't just forget about Evil X. 

His presence here put Hermitcraft- my friends- in danger. 

I pondered the best course of action in that department, meanwhile having fun with the other Joe and Cleophas. 

The three of us were up to no good, as you might expect. Don't worry though, it's not anything bad. Just really entertaining! 

Together we came up with the idea of building a hermit zoo. Essentially, it was a place where each hermit would get an exhibit in which we make fun of them! Friendly making fun of them, of course! 

So far the project was working wonderfully as a distraction from worrying about Evil X and Badtimes. 

Well, except for the times when I worried about them, of course. 

Many of the hermits didn't think Badtimes was actually bad, but I wasn't so sure. He seemed- suspicious to me. The fact that he was always around when bad things happened- like at the portal when it malfunctioned, and when Keralis got killed by The Big Gay™, apparently. 

No, I didn't have proof that he was actually guilty in any of those situations, but I also couldn't justify trusting him as readily as some of the other hermits did. 

Also, I must point out that his name was "Badtimeswithscar." That wasn't exactly reassuring either. There's no reason he had to live up to his name, but one can never be too sure. 

At any rate, I had plans to execute. Things were going downhill very quickly on Hermitcraft again, and we had a secret weapon. It was about time to put it to use. 

Xisuma had anticipated this- or at least something like it. As a result, he prepared for it before he died. It just so happens that I'm the only one who knew about it. 

Folks might ask: what is the secret weapon? 

Well, the secret weapon is me.

Correction: it was supposed to be me. Until Evil X complicated things. As usual. 

Xisuma and I's plan involved making me a god. It wasn't an easy process. It involved many tests and a book. A magical, godly one.

The exact same book that I had seen in Evil X's library in the recent war. That was the moment I realized he had stolen it. And I couldn't just take it back that easily. 

My power now did not match up to Evil X's at all. Trying to fight him would be a failed mission. 

No, I was going to have to be sneaky about this. 

And considering I was the secret weapon, I had to keep this a secret. Even from Cleo and the other, quite handsome Joe. I could never be too sure that Evil X wasn't listening in on us. 

Not that he suspected me- I mean, I'm not exactly anyone's first choice to make a god. That's kinda the point! 

I wasn't about to ruin the element of surprise if I could help it. 

So either I got my godly powers fully, or I let Jevin battle it out with his Ex forever with their matching abilities. 

I figured, if we had a secret weapon, we might as well use it. That way I could help poor Jevin out with saving Hermitcraft from impending doom!

Therefore, that night- the night after our wide-eyed friend was trapped by Beef and Badtimes and brutally killed- I snuck out of the winery. 

I took a deep breath of the chilly, fresh night air as I gazed around at the berry fields, illuminated by the eerie silver glow of the moon.