The Feel of Water

Thirty - When the Truth Breaks Free

Nick told me you're at a wedding with Allison, that you're going to hers after. Can we talk?

Dani, please.

I'm going to be there when you get back. We need to talk.

I drop my phone to my lap and stare up at the roof of Alisha's car, not answering Sean's texts. My head is spinning from the alcohol, and hardly picking at my dinner didn't help with my weak tolerance for it. Becca and Allison are in the back seat, blubbering on about some old romantic comedy that makes them yearn for such unrealistic charm.

"Did you know—did you know that last week—this actually happened—last week Nick was looking at some other girl and when I asked him about it he just said; what? She's just a pretty girl. Can't you believe that? Right to my face while I was sitting there eating a veggie burger like some ugly whale," Allison whines. "And when I got all hurt—like any girl would—he just said I was taking it the wrong way."

Becca rubs her face and rolls her head to look at her. "Wait. What?" She questions, seemingly stepping in and out of consciousness.

"Were you suppose to leave with us?" I ask Becca, turning my body in the passenger seat.

She shrugs. "I dunno. I don't care. I wasn't going to stay there while they packed up all their stupid presents and leftover cake. That's why I'm here."

"Well, I guess it's too late now. You should at least text someone to tell them where you are."

Alisha pipes up and says, "We're almost at your house, Allison."

My chest bubbles with anxiety. I sink down in my seat and dread the nonexistent explanation I'm going to have to give Sean for drunkenly calling him from a country-club bathroom. And also for blurting that I love him. I don't even know how I'm going to go about that without sounding like a crazed, clingy creep. The guy doesn't talk to me for days, tells me he's busy, so I confess my love for him—it's beyond moronic.

When Alisha turns onto Allison's street, I can't help but notice his truck parked up ahead.

It was the wedding. It was the vows and the endearment and cocktails that brought me to do such a thing. I know I'm not this girl. I'm not the girl that calls her boyfriend to cry about how insecure she's feeling. I don't tell people I love them, especially guys who I think I can trust but really can't; guys that I decided to give myself to, mind and body, only to be forgotten about for a whole week.

We pull into the empty driveway and come to a final halt. Alisha wiggles out her key and the headlights die. "Alright," she takes a breath, "let's get you guys inside."

"Sean is here," I say suddenly. Everyone stops, and I think Becca even stops breathing. "He's here to talk to me."

"What? Why? Why now?" Alisha questions and looks into the rear-view mirror. She stretches to check out the side windows then turns back to me once she notices the truck.

"I called him in the bathroom. I said I loved him."

Becca gasps. "You didn't."

"I did. And I hung up right after."

"Can we still get out?" Allison asks, her hand on the door handle. "Because I really need to pee."

"Are you going to talk to him?"

I glance to Alisha and say, "I mean, I kind of have to. He's like right there."

"Go on then. I can get them inside."

I swallow and nod. "Yeah, okay. I'll come right in after."

She sends me off with a small, reassuring smile. I clutch my bag and my phone before popping open the door and climbing out. I see Sean get out of his car, shutting the door and walking around the hood to meet me. The sight of him makes tears prick in the back of my eyes, but they stay there, unable to flow freely, not under my strict command. I know what I said in my thoughts—that it was the wedding and its enchanting spell that made me say it—but seeing Sean now... I do love him. It's burned into the pulsating flesh of my guarded little heart.