symbiosis » levi ackerman

chapter five ; paranoia.

Fallan
I ran, as quickly as I possibly could. It felt like I was wading my way through quicksand. Edward was ahead of me, he glanced backwards - his bright blue eyes locking onto mine. He looked desperate as he mouthed something at me. I couldn't hear anything, deafening white noise filled my ears.
Suddenly, all went silent.

"HELP!"

I woke up, breathing erratically, in a pool of my own cold sweat. I gulped down air like I was oxygen starved.
"Fuck," I sighed. Damn nightmares.
I checked the time. 2:25am. At least I'd managed to get a few hours in. My day usually began at 5am, so I had some time to kill. I knew there was no chance of me getting back to sleep, so I decided to begin some paperwork. I swung my legs over the edge of the bed, placing my feet on the cold oak floor and racking a hand through my hair. It was damp with sweat.
I decided I'd go to the shared kitchen area by the dining hall before starting my paperwork, I needed something to eat. I threw it into a ponytail as I stood up - I'd fallen asleep in my hoodie and brown pants. It was unlikely I'd bump into anyone so I didn't bother to change. I caught sight of myself of myself in the mirror as I left my bedroom; my face was pale and glistened with a thin layer of moisture, there were heavy bags that hung under my puffy bloodshot eyes, my lips were chapped and I'd missed half my hair from the ponytail. I looked a treat. It was lucky nobody would be up at this time. I'd probably give them a fright.
I didn't bother throwing my boots on, so I padded to the kitchen in my socks, pulling the sleeves of my hoodie down so they covered my hands. As I neared the hall, I saw a warm glow emanating from the kitchen area. Someone probably forgot to blow out a candle. Damn cadets. With a war against the titans raging, the last thing we needed was a fire in the base. I walked through the doorway, with the intention of snuffing out the candle.
"What the fuck are you doing up?" came a husky voice.
I let out a yelp in surprise and turned around to see Levi sat at a table, cup of tea in hand. I relaxed at the sight of him, feeling the adrenaline from the shock fade away.
"I could ask you the same thing." I replied breathlessly.
"You look like shit." He tutted and looked away.
I scoffed at his crude comment. "Thank you."
"Wanna talk about it?" He asked, monotone as ever.
"No." I replied quickly.
"Good. I don't wanna hear it anyway."
God, he really was bipolar. I turned my back to him and grabbed a bread roll, planning to exit the awkward situation as soon as possible. I turned back around, and was greeted with his face centimetres away from mine. I shrieked again and swatted at him. He handed me a teacup and returned to his seat, looking off into the distance.
"Valerian and Camomile." He stated bluntly.
I took a sip, it tasted of flowers. It reminded me of home for a fleeting second. Mother always did love the rich floral teas of Mitras.
"Are you not sleeping?" Levi asked, tilting his head back slightly. I debated telling him the truth - the reoccurring visions of death that plagued my dreams, but the idea of speaking to him while he was in this mood didn't appeal.
"I sleep fine normally. This is a one-off." I shrugged.
I heard him tut, and there was a moment of silence.
"Bullshit."
I scoffed and began to argue.
"I know the signs Reid. There's sweat on your forehead but you're shivering slightly, you're still in the same clothes as earlier, your hair is a mess and your eyes look wild. You're on edge. Nightmares, isn't it?" He turned to me, meeting my wide eyed gaze. "Wanna tell me what they're about?"
I set the teacup down and cleared my throat. "No. Thank you."
I began to walk towards the doorway, brushing past him when he grabbed the crook of my arm.
"You can talk to me, you know?" He said, his voice rasping slightly. As his eyes looked up at mine, I saw them soften slightly.
What's his fucking deal? I snatched my arm back and scooted backwards. The almost soft gaze vanished, instead he rolled his eyes and leant back in his chair, clearing his throat.
"As your Superior, I mean. I should know these things. An unrested solider is a liability out on the field."
A quick cover up for his momentary weakness.
"Nothing I can't handle Captain." I replied slowly, making sure my tone remained calm. I felt uneasy around the raven haired male and his turbulent emotions - or lack there-of. I'd seen the way he treated the cadets - he was brutal. I hadn't had the pleasure of being on Levi's bad side, but I'd definitely witnessed it.
He took another sip of his tea, and racked a hand through his hair. He had the same dishevelled look I'd noticed earlier. I sighed and took a seat opposite him, he quirked an eyebrow at me.
"I'll tell if you do." I said, smiling slightly at him. I saw a smirk threaten to appear on his lips as he shrugged. I began to wonder why he closed off every emotion, but quickly wiped the thought from my head. It wasn't my business to figure this man out.
"It's the same image every time I close my eyes." he replied, "Farlan and Isabel."
I felt the smile fall from my face slowly. Those were the two he'd arrived with, in Flagon's squad.
"Their eyes mostly. Isabel's were so lifeless, and Farlan's were fearful." he looked up at me with sad eyes, yet his expression remained stony, "I'd never seen them like that before."
He looked away, staring at the liquid in his cup. I gulped and reached across the table, placing my hand on his arm as a comforting gesture. His eyes darted back to mine with raised eyebrows, clearly it had surprised him. I went to move it away but he put his cup down quickly and placed his hand on mine, squeezing slightly. We stayed there for a few seconds in comfortable silence, before he pulled his hands away and cleared his throat.
"Anyways, I seem to remember you saying if I told, you would too. I'm all ears." he grumbled.
I felt anxiety begin to knot in my stomach. I had only spoke of Edward's death once - to Benjin in the Cadet Corps. It was unspoken in my family, the mention of my dead brother's name brought too much pain to my parents. I tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear and took a deep breath.
Well, here goes nothing.