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The After Party Of Broken Hearts

Warning:
•self harm
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Everybody went back to Tyler's to get ready for the Launch party. Well. Everybody except Marcus. I was glad Troye wasn't there as I asked Tyler if PJ could come. Nobody had seen him for a while. A part of me wanted to go and find him and make sure he was okay, but I shook it off and climbed into the minibus next to Dan, Phil and Issie
They were all telling me how sorry they were about what happened, but their words washed over me and I just smiled and nodded. They were silenced when PJ climbed into the car after me.
"PJ!" Exclaimed Phil
Dan smiled crookedly at him.
"Hey Dan. Hey phil" Said PJ
"How come you're coming with us?" Said Dan "oh, I mean, I want you to come I was just asking..haha" Dan laughed nervously.
I could imagine this being one if his cringe attacks in the near future.
"Noah asked me to come." He said, smiling down at me "and it's okay Dan, don't have an existential crisis" he chuckled
For most of the journey the boys chatted about possibly getting the Fantastic Foursome back together, while Issie proceeded to tell me all about how she and Dan played twister and how he totally climbed on top of her.
A few hours later
Tyler was already a little tipsy as we walked into the bar.
"Are you sure you're okay?" I whispered to him.
"Who me? Oh Noah stop being such a party pooper. NOW WHERE ARE THE DRINKS WOOO!" Tyler ran into the bar whooping and cheering.
"You look worried, what's wrong?" Said PJ, putting his hand on the small of my back
"No-nothing!" I said "let's go inside" I have him a weak smile.
Troye's POV
I knew there was a huge party thing going on, but I couldn't bare to see her again.
But maybe she isn't there.. Maybe she's just as sad as I am and misses me too.
"Quit kidding yourself" I scolded myself out loud.
Not even Tumblr could distract me from what happened, especially when my dashboard was full of #Toah posts. I shut my laptop and looked around my hotel room.
Empty. Just like me.
I'm so so stupid. How did I even think this was going to last? A girl like her doesn't ever get together with an idiot like me.
I could send her a text. Tell her I'm sorry that whatever we had ended.
No. I would seem too desperate.
I am desperate.
Noah's POV
As I danced wildly with people I would have never expected to have met a few weeks ago, my mind wandered to Troye. What was he doing now? What if he's with Marcus again. My dancing slowed to just swaying my hips, with a distant concerned look plastered on my face.
I need to get him off my mind.
Normally I don't even drink. It's not because I'm one of those sensible girls, I just hate the taste. But today it felt necessary to drown my sorrows.
"5 vodka shots please." I said to the bar man
He have me a knowing look.
"Boy troubles?" He said pulling out five shot glasses from under the counter.
"No!" I said far too quickly
"Alright sweetheart. Just don't do anything stupid" he said
I picked up the cold glass filled with a transparent liquid. I considered dropping the glass, but then an image of Troye burst into my head.
I downed the shot and scrunched up my face. The liquid was so sour.
I tried another, then the other three.
Then I ordered another round.
After another.
After another.
Three hours later.
Troyes POV
I decided staring at a blank wall wasn't helping the situation, so I opened my laptop again and searched for something to watch on Netflix.
I settled for despicable me.
Suddenly I heard some noise from the next room. I paused the film.
I heard a high pitched giggle, followed by a male's sigh. I heard the door open and the shuffle of feet. Then I heard moans.
Sounds like they're having fun
I put the film back on
"Ohh" I heard through the wall, even over the film I was watching
I turned up the volume.
"Ohhh....Noah"
I immediately jumped up from my slouched position when I heard her name.
Maybe it's another person with the same name..
"Who am I kidding?" I said to myself, as I burst into tears.
I sobbed into my pillowcase until it was soaked. A few minutes later I raised my head from its dark shelter and looked across the now blurred hotel room, and at the desk with a complementary notepad, pencil and sharpener.
Sharpener.
I walked slowly over to the desk and picked up the sharpener with shaky hands. So quickly, I unscrewed the screws.
No Troye. Remember you stopped. You promised Tyler.
Thoughts of guilt overwhelmed my brain as I removed the blade from its plastic case as I had done so many times.
I then rolled up my sleeves to reveal the white scars that held so many painful memories.
Noah's POV
"I'm soooo drunk" I hiccuped as PJ unhooked my bra
PJ hesitated when he heard me, but he still went on to kiss my neck, giving me love bites all over.
I let out a soft moan as his hand passed over my crotch. He pulled down my underwear swiftly, and then his own.
Soon enough he was on top of me, rocking back and forth, to a rhythm that both excited me and put me at ease.
The next morning
I opened one eye at a time, the realisation of what had just happened coming slowly but surely.
Fuck.
It felt like there was an inferno burning inside my head
I rolled over to see PJ, lying on his front snoring softly into his pillow.
Suddenly images from last night can back to me.
I jerked away from him and rolled out of bed, trying to find my clothes.
As I tied my shoe laces I heard the bed sheets move.
I grabbed my bag from the desk chair and opened the door as quietly as I could.
"Noah?"
Oh shit
"Where are you going?" Said PJ, sitting up in bed
"Um, out?" I said.
"Why? Stay here"
I shut the door and walked over to the bed.
"Listen," I began
My head throbbed violently. Hangovers really did suck.
"I think last night was a mistake" I said, Looking at my feet.
"What makes you say that?" Said PJ, his eyebrows raising
"Well I was drunk for a start."
"But you kissed me at Vidcon.."
"That doesn't mean I want to sleep with you." I shouted
He opened his mouth to reply.
"Don't bother trying to prove yourself right" I said.
I gave him one last disgusted look, and walked out of the door.
I was in the hallway now, all alone. I glanced at the room number. 105.
All the way down the elevator I was thinking about Troye. He was all I could think about. Was it wrong what I did with PJ?
No. You weren't even his girlfriend.
But I wanted to be.
I walked outside the lobby and into the LA sunshine.
What hotel did he stay in anyway? I was too drunk to remember.
I turned to look at the huge lettering on the building.
The Greensleeves Hotel
That rang a bell in the back of my mind.
"Yeah, if you want to come visit, I'm staying at room 104 of The Greensleeves hotel" said Troye
"I will! We could shoot a video"
Oh my god.
PJ and Troye were staying in the same hotel. In rooms next to each other.

And everybody knows hotel walls are paper thin.