As the car who hit Emily drove off, Emily gets up, shaking the glass off of her and moving each and every limb to make sure she still has feeling in them.
Declan runs towards her.
"QUICK, EMILY" Declan screams desperately.
"WHAT DEC WHAT IS IT???" Emily asks confused.
"WHERES LEE LEE IN A BOTTLE"
"Oh no..."
Panic sets in. Emily and Declan look around the scene to see if they can spot Lee Lee in a bottle. Suddenly, Emily sees something glimmering on the other side of the pavement...
"Dec!!! Over there!!!" Emily squeals.
"LEE LEE!!!" Declan shouts with joy and begins to run to the other side of the pavement, Stevie wonderly.
"YOURE GONNA GET YOURSELF KILLED!!!" Emily screams in a panic.
*BOOM CRASH DING DONG BOOGIE WOOGIE BONK DOLPHIN CALL*
"DECLAN!!!!!!!!"
A 174-hp 1.5L Turbocharged Engine 7-Inch Display Audio Touch-Screen One-Touch Power Moonroof 8-Way Power Driver's Seat 2020 Honda Civic hit Declan at full force.
Emily's condition of having flatnoseinitis allows her to have a Rachel-Kiki-like memory, photographic.
She remembers the license plate.
"Auggghhxhh oh God" Declan moans, bent over in pain with blood dripping out of his nose and his right eye the color of nickocado avocados hole.
"Are you okay baby??" Emily weeps, also crippling in ache because she too was hit by a car.
"What do you think about the blood that I bleed😏 ahaha..."
They makeout.
The way Emily had severe iron deficiency but the makeout session with declan who had broken many teeth in the accident cured it.
"Wow..." declan breathes out in pleasure.
"Wait Dec...." Emily pauses.
"I remember the license plate..... it was....."
"LKE CTFTH"
...
Declan sees Lee Lee in a Bottle on the curb and immediately grabs it.
Emily calls the police(no not sting... you don't know who sting is?? How old are you wtf... you're 6?? You're actually at a really high reading level omg... but yeah He was a singer in a band called the police. That's the joke get it bc police police. Do i want your blue scooby gummy? You're so sweet wtf.... the way we're besties now❤️)
"111 What is your emergency?" The operator on the police line asks.
"ME AND MY... guy friend.. HAVE BEEN HIT BY A CAR....... NO EACH BY A DIFFERENT CAR... YES THE SAME STREET... NO WE WERE NOT DRINKING ITS 1 PM.... WE WERE WALKING WHY WOULD IF MATTER IF WE WERE DRINKING?..... OKAY BITCH LOOK WHERE YOU WORKING.... YA MAMA....... YOU KNOW WHAT FUCK YOU AND YOUR FAMILY BITCH.... BALD HEADED ASS.... KEEP THAT SAME ENERGY..... UHUH.... AHHH YOU MAD.... ok we're on the corner of Main Street."
*10 minutes later*
*WEEWOOOWEEEWOO* The police arrive.
YOU ARE READING
A Farting Fantasy - Declan McKenna
FanfictionLife is mundane for 18-year-old Emily Vanita who was born and raised in a small town just outside of London, until one day when she gets a call from BBC Radio 1 that gives her the opportunity of a lifetime...
