Horror washed over declan as he realised lee lee was gone and his little brazil may never be fully erect again without his 50 year old lover in a bottle who was once Daniel.
Declan knew that to get Lee Lee in a bottle back he had to make a sacrifice.
A human sacrifice.
with that in mind he threw emily into the lake on the side of the road and started chanting
"WATER 💦 ICE 🧊 SALT 🧂 AYE ‼️ WATER 💦 ICE 🧊 SALT 🧂 AYE ‼️"
repeatedly.
then he farted into it the remnants of his cousin and lover daniel's spirit into it for good measure.
*BRBBRBRB SSSSSS........ 💥KRACKATOA💥*
there was a big explosion that almost set declan flying up the air. he looked up in disbelief.
Suddenly in a cloud of purple smoke, a giant omnipotent figure appeared.
it was the lord and saviour McBeardy(formerly known as Tom)with Chicken wif shoes on a leash and they were passionately making out.
They descended to the floor on the side of the lake where Declan was.
In disgust, Declan says "Woah tom I dunno what your relationship is with the chicken and all that but can't help but feel it's gone a bit past wanking each other off at 3 am.... it feels too close to comfort" his voice trailed off as mcbeardy failed to listen and started to take his clothes off.
Declan grabbed chicken wif shoes and threatened to shit on it if mcbeardy didn't stop which made mcbeardy laugh out loud because it turns out sharting heightens the chicken's strength and mc beardy got mad because declan had licked the road clean of all the delicious excrements of declan and emily.
With a sigh, mc beardy turned to chicken wif shoes.
"You know what this means right....?"
"We have to capture Plamen's lover"
YOU ARE READING
A Farting Fantasy - Declan McKenna
FanfictionLife is mundane for 18-year-old Emily Vanita who was born and raised in a small town just outside of London, until one day when she gets a call from BBC Radio 1 that gives her the opportunity of a lifetime...
