Dear Addiction

Chapter forty two

"What're you naming him?" Dean asked, watching Jack, who sat on the hotel bed next to the one Dean laid across, play. The child had the stuffed elephant from Christmas in one hand, and the stuffed elephant that Dean had bought from the zoo in his other. Dean couldn't help it, Jack had wanted the elephant so bad, so of course he'd turned around and bought it, ignoring Cas's disapproving glare the whole time.

"Tom!"

Dean brought the glass cup to his lips, taking a drink of the gin he'd bought from the nearby liquor store. The alcohol burned down his throat in the best, most needed way possible, though it still wasn't enough to calm the adrenaline that had come from driving. "Isn't the other one Tom?"

Jack looked up to Dean for a second, before looking back to the stuffed animals. "No," he lifted the one elephant in the air. "Tis's Tommy."

"Oh, so you have Tom, and tommy?"

"Yah!"

The smallest smile tugged at Dean's face as he shook his head. "Cause That's not goin' to be confusing."

Dean brought the glass back to his lips, taking another drink as he watched the child continue to play. His gaze stayed on Jack until the sound of the bathroom door came, and Cas stepped out in his pajamas, his hair wet from his shower, a few strands sticking to his forehead.

"Jack," Cas said, as he sat next to his son. "It's time to put your pyjamas on, do you need help?"

"No!" Jack cried. He grabbed the clothing from Cas's hands, before running off to the hotel's bathroom, leaving Dean and Cas alone in the large suite.

For a moment they sat in complete silence, Dean's gaze on the empty glass in his hand, studying the little bit of alcohol left in it. His gaze stayed there for another second before he stood from his bed, a low creaking coming as he walked across the room and to the small kitchen where he'd left the bottle of gin.

"Dean," he hummed in response, pouring himself another glass before he brought it back to his lips. "I should apologize about Jack earlier today."

Dean turned to the other, the smallest frown across his lips. "You don't have to apologize for anything." Despite his reassurance, Dean doubted Cas believed it. "Kids cry, it's part of the contract of having them." He walked back across the room. At first he hesitated at his own bed, before continuing to Cas's taking a seat next to the other. "Besides, I had tons of fun anyways."

"You did?"

"Yah," Dean looked to Cas, a smile across his own face. He could feel his heart quicken, as his gaze met the others, the realization hitting that maybe he'd sat a little closer than friends should have. Their thighs touching, arms brushing with each little movement, lips so close Dean could easily lean in. Not that he would, they were friends. Friends that occasionally kissed, and slept together, but friends non the less, nothing more.

Dean's gaze had dropped to Cas's lips, staying there for another second before he looked back to Cas's eyes. His heart still hammering against his chest, body tense with nerves. "Did you see the fuckin polar bears?"

A small smile grazed Cas's lips as he gave a nod. "I did."

"The only thing that could have made it better is if there were koala bears."

"Koalas," Castiel corrected.

"That's what I said."

"No you said koala bears, they aren't bears."

"Yes they are, have you seen those sons of a bitches?"

"Dean," Cas insisted, though there was a lightness to his voice, a tone that matched the small smile across his face. Dean wished that smile would stay forever, it wasn't like the ones that came when Jack was around, but it was better than his usually scowl. Lighting up his face, giving a shine to his eyes that wasn't usually there. "I specialized in zoology."