A Wesley for me

chapter 13

I was on my way to meet Mason at the library to tell him what I decided. We had been dating for six months now but things where no longer the same I was becoming distant and he was becoming impatient with me. I made it to the library and found him at one of the tables reading a book, slowly I approached him before taking a seat infront of him gaining his attention. Immediately he noticed I wasnt wearing the pendant he gave me "so this is it huh" he said with a sad smile as I returned that smile equally as sad as he was he then stood up and hugged me "everything's gonna be alright I love you.." he said as i felt as though i wanted to cry "i love you too and I'm sorry maybe in the future but now wasnt the best time Mason..I'm so sorry" I said as we parted and I kissed his cheek as a few stray tears slipped out. He smiled at me before placing a kiss on my forehead, grabbing his book he walked away leaving me there alone wiping away those few tears that slipped out and composing myself again. As I turned around to leave I saw Fred standing there giving me a small smile "you alright" he asked putting an arm around my shoulder as we walked out of the library slowly "yeah it's just gonna take sometime but I'll be fine" I said with a small smile as we walked "well I have to go to potions" he said as we stopped walking "yeah I need to head to Muggle studies talk to you at dinner then" I said going down the opposite hall from him.

I was sitting in the commons on the couch with a blanket and my song book but I wasnt able to think properly, i saw Hermione walk in she took a seat next to me bringing me over to lean on her "Fred told me I'm sorry Camila" she said causing me to laugh "it's alright honestly I'm alright we will still be friends and who knows maybe when this is all over we can try again" I said looking up at her as she smiled "so when you where spending christmas with him and his family did anything interesting happen" she asked causing me to blush "YOU DID IT DIDN'T YOU!" she squeeled in excitement "would you be quite please" I said in a hushed voice "and what did our Camila do?" I heard Fred say as I turned to him embarrassed "not your business" I said as my face was a bright red. He seemed to catch on and a giant smirk graced his face "Camila you cheeky girl you" he said as he sat on the arm of the couch "drop it alright I dont want to talk about it" I said looking at the fire place embarrassed "was it like you thought" asked Hermione excited as I smiled at her "oh Mione it was so specially really it was..... Wait no I said drop it" I screeched out after realizing what I was saying causing Fred and Hermione to laugh "fine you joy kill" she said as Fred left to meet George.

We where at the great hall for dinner and I could see Mason talking with a fourth year girl she had long blander hair a slim body and a beautiful face causing me to sigh. We had just broke up and he was already on to the next one I felt a small pang in my heart but refused to show it, I just pushed my food around not really hungry. I got up excusing my self as I walked out and back to the commons, I reached the Gryffindor commons and went to my room going threw my trunk finding my pills for depression Dumbledore made me get from a healer. My hand tightened against the bottle before throwing them back into my trunk, I went to the bathroom with some scissors. I stared at my reflecting before sighing, I cut my hair until it just slightly reached my shoulders then i used a spell to even it out. I looked at myself on last time before going back to my room pulling out my guitar again as I tied what I could into a low messy bun.

"Cant tell my mama
It makes her worry
I'm not suicidal sometimes the lines get all blurry
Yeah I cut my hair close my blinds play hallelujah like 2 dozen times"
I sang softly before stopping and putting my guitar down before laying back down. I never received any message from my uncle so I figure he must have been busy I was just thankful tomorrow was the weekend.

I  was sitting in bed reading a book not really on the mood to see Mason flirting with that fourth year. Suddenly Ginny burst into the room and grabbed my hand yanking me out of bed "Ginny what are you doing!" I said surprised as she lead me out of th commons and through the halls "taking you to eat breakfast" she shot back not once looking at me as she continued to drag me though the halls "I'm bot hungry Ginny let go" I said about to snatch my hand away as she turned to me with a glare "if you dont come and eat something I will hez you into next week Camila" she warned causing me to gulp "but.." she cute me off as she softened her stare "Fred and George are worried and so are Harry and them please if not for you for us" she said causing me to sigh as I followed her lazily through the Halls and into the great hall. As we entered it seemed as if the place quoted down and all eyes where on me news of Mason and I travelled fairly quickly yesterday so I wasnt so surprised at the attention. I looked away and walked to the table taking my seat next to Fred and Hermione "wow somebody just got out of bed" teased Fred as he messed with my messed up bun "please stop" I said not once looking at him and I grabbed some coffee. I looked at Ginny as she watched me i showed her the coffee and toast with a 'you happy look' as I took a bite of the toast and then a sip of my coffee she seemed to smile in satisfaction and went back to talking to one of her other friends. I placed the toast down and dusted my hands off before taking another sip of my coffee "Camila try this" Fred said as I looked at him with an arched brow as he extended his hand with a chocolate in his palm "no" I stated before taking another sip of my hot drink "oh come on dont you trust us" said George as I turned to him rolling my eyes "no I dont I know you guys well enough to know that is gonna cause something to happen to me" I said as finished of my coffee "why Camila that hurts" said fred while I just made a face and rolled my eyes "we would never do such a thing to you" finished George "oh give me the damn thing" I said popping into my mouth as they watched my face. I swallowed it and frankly nothing happened "that was actually pretty good now tell me what's going to happen to me" I said looking between the two of them as the smiled "nothing" they said in union "we just figured you would like some chocolate most girls do when their sad or getting over a break up" said Fred "and we made it ourselves so its extra special" finished George causing me to smile "you guys are so sweet but I'm done eating I'm going to head back to the commons I'm tured and honestly dont like being the only one in my pajamas in here" I said standing up as they all frowned at me. I ignored their stares as I walked away , I was in the halls when I heard my name called. I turned around and saw Amazon walkingnover to me "arenyou alright you dont look to well" he said as he looked at me concerned "just tired is all no need to worry" I said with an fake smile he gave me one of his bright smile before nodding his head and walking off to catch up with his friends and the fourth year from yesterday causing me to frown. I made it back to the commons and made my way back to my bed once there I ploped down face first sighingnbefore hugging my pillow and closing my eyes hoping to get some sleep.