Salt Simulator: A Salt AU

High School Never Ends

"Are you ready for a rocking time?!?!?"

"YEAH!"

"I CAN'T HEAR YOU! ARE YOU READY FOR A ROCKING TIME????"

"YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

Pepper and I were dancing along to the music at the party. There were conga lines, Harlem shakes, and cha-cha slides.

"Salt. THIS. IS. SO MUCH FUN! I might just forget about my diarreha! "

"Yeah, Pepper! You and I will dance the night away! Also, that's really gross."

"Oh, come on. You don't take baffffs, so I can have my thing, right?"

"Sure, Pepper, sure."

"Anyways, have you seen OJ? He looks freaking hot tonight! I mean, seriously, bowties are fricking sexy!"

I didn't know what she was talking about, until she pulled me and turned me around. There, I saw OJ talking with Pickle and Paper, all dressed up. Not kidding, he looked fancy. He was ready to walk down a red carpet. He could get a free Oscar award just by dressing up. Dang. 

"Wow, he does look nice." 

"I know, right? Wow, what a catch!"

"Sure..."

Lying to her was the easiest thing I've ever done. That's one of the talents I have: acting like my life depends on it. 

"Well, what do you want to do?"

"My feet hurt. Let's sit down."

So, we went down to the folding chairs and sat down. Pepper pulled out her phone and went on her social media account.

"Wow! Did you know: the moon isn't real, Salt?"

"Still, I believe that the Earth is a hope bagel."

"Oh, you have to see it to believe it. IKEA is a place where you can find horror things."

"And curses. Have you heard of the Best Buy curse?"

"No?"

"Ugh, that's like, totally uncool."

"But have you read fanfiction?"

"Yeah! Ones about death and stuff, and have death by golf!"

"Jeez, you are weird. Anyways, I have to go to the bathroom. See you in a little bit!"

"See you." 

So, Pepper stood up and left me, alone. I went over to the refreshment table and grabbed some punch. Shadily drinking my punch, I saw Baseball and Nickel go up onto the stage, looking like they were dressed up for a Canada winter. 

"Um...testing? Testing? Is this thing on? Ok, we're going to perform a song for you, while doing over 20+ quick changes! Do not try this at home, kids." Baseball sighed, almost tripping over his clothes.

"Yeah. (I still can't believe you roped me into this, Baseball...)."

"Oh, it's only for like- about 3 minutes."

"Oh, shut up. I'm not getting enough credit for this."

So, I'm left with a choice. Would I:

> follow Pepper (-5%)

> watch the performance (-5%)

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I mentioned the Camp Camp Killing Game 

Also, stop arguing Cheescrophone shippers! I found a great name for the ship!

Mic and Cheese (hahaha funny)

no me gusta el béisbol