Seduced by Redemption

ESCAPE 22

Chapter 22

After what he did to me, here I go again. Crying until the pain fades away as if it will really fade that easily.

I wiped the tears that falling again, I'm lost counting how many times I'm wiping this freaking tears!

Hindi ko magawang tumayo sa pagkakahiga dahil hindi ko maipaliwanag ang sakit na nararamdaman ko sa ginawa niya kahapon. Napaka-talonan ko, I should have fight, I should have leave.

Nang mangalay ang kaliwang bahagi ng katawan ko ay pinilit kong lumipat sa kabilang bahagi. Ngunit kahit anong pilit kong puwersahin ang katawan ko sa paggalaw ay ni hindi ko magawa. Parang daig ko pa ang naparalisa.

Hindi 'rin maganda ang pakiramdam ko at palagi akong dinadatnan ng antok dahil na 'din siguro sa pagod. Sino ba naman ang hindi mapapagod sa sitwasyong ganito araw araw?

Sa palagay ko ay wala ng katapusan ang sakit na 'to. Wala ng pag-asang maayos ang lahat ng ito.

Bakit? dahil paano ko maaayos ang taong ayaw magpa-ayos? paano ko aayusin ang sitwasyong alam kong ang nakaraan ang sanhi ng lahat? Paano ko mababago ang bagay na sa alam kong may lamat na? Paano?

Paano ako makakalaya sa sakit? dahil sa taong mas pinapamukha sa akin na iba ako sa taong hindi ko mahigitan?

Gusto ko mang mapantayan ang taong 'yon...ang kambal ko.

Umiling ako, paano ko mahihigitan ang babaeng 'yon?

Ayokong magpatalo sa taong patay na.

Pinunasan ko na naman ang lumandas na luha. Huminga ako ng malalim at pumikit.

********
LIAM's POV

I'm just staring at her the whole time and I can feel the pain...her pain.

I'm just too GAGO to do that to her. I really want to punch myself and fight myself as if there's someone inside me who's controlling me more than the real me.

I stand up when I saw her forehead wrinkle.

I stepped closer and sat beside her. I slide my palm to her cheeks and wiped the tears falling. Even when she's asleep I can't deny she's beautiful but fuck those tears! I hate seeing them on her face!

I tried to moved her on the other side because I know she feels numb on her position. When I moved her, I can clearly see her back sweating.

I look at the aircon but it's enough to not feel the hot but I remember a thing. I clench my fist that makes me mad to myself even more.

It's not a sweat. I-it's a blo-blood.

"Fuck!" I murmur.

I get the tissue on the side table and get closer to her because I will put this temporarily. I'm so stupid I didn't thought about her clothes. I'm the one who orders her clothes everyday and give it myself to her. I just want her to feel the 'kilig'.

Because...gusto kong bumawi.

This is all for her, for Gianne. No one else.

Only my Gianne.

*FLASHBACK*

"Gianne can you stop?!" i shout.

Because she's too closer from me and I don't want it. It's not like I hate it but--

Yeah, I li-like her and my heart can't stop beating when she's near me.

"Ang damot naman nito! hihingi naman eh!"

And there she goes again, she pouted her lips.

I look at it and damn! that soft wet light pinkish lips. I just thought, how does it feel when it touches against mine?

"Hoy ano ba! magtigil nga kayo!"

"Geanna, please talk to your twin and never ever do that again."

"Ang arte mo!"

Nope, I'm not! I love it!

Suddenly, she did it again. She jump beside me and forcing to get my food, the cornik which is also her favorite. Mas lalo na kapag may suka at maanghang.

I hear Geanna make a fake cough, "Gianne, ano ka ba? marami sa kusina niyan." she looked at me and smiled. Yeah, Geanna knows too that I like her twin. How? because I told her.

After we watch, we decided to go to the garden. I was just thinking...what if I'll make a move now? I'll court her?

But fudge! what if he doesn't like me? then i got basted? the-then she lik-likes someone?!

What should I do?

"Ang lalim ng iniisip mo ah." I saw Geanna pushing her wheelchair towards me. I stand and help her.

"Salamat," she said and sip the juice she was holding.

"Kamusta?"

"Huh?" I said confusingly.

"Ikaw talaga oh, alam ko namang in love kana sa kambal ko." I frowned on what she said.

I-in love?

How would I know?

"Halata naman kasi,"

"What?"

"Na in love ka nga!" and she giggle.

Am I?

"Oo nga!"

"Pa-paano?" I Said. Because I never been in love with someone and I don't know how it feels.

She sigh in deep, "Ikaw ba? sa tingin mo mahal mo si Gianne?"

"Hi-hindi!"

I saw her forehead crumpled, "Hindi?"

"Hi-hindi ko alam."

"Ano bang nararamdaman mo? kasi limang buwan mo ng gusto si Gianne. Kahit meron man siya o wala sa tabi mo eh palagi kong naririnig ang pangalan niya."

wh-what?! she heard it?!

"Kung titigan mo siya parang hindi lang GUSTO ang sinasabi ng mga mata mo." then she shrug. "Ikaw din, baka maunahan ka. Gusto mo ba non?"

I just look at her with a serious expression.

"Pangit sa mata kung yung taong mahal mo...iba ang kasama. Imagine? what if you missed the chance to confess your feelings? malay mo may feelings 'din siya sayo. Swerte mo kahit 'di ka ganon ka-perfect pero may isang taong totoong mahal ka at----"

"ENOUGH." I said in authority.

I don't know why I suddenly felt this.

The feeling of someone will take Gianne away from me!

No no no! I can't. Even though she had or she never had a feelings for me, I will make her mine.

"You okay?" she asked.

I nod and lean my back on the chair and cross my arms.

"Teach me." and directly look at her.

"Ano?" she ask confusingly.

I smirk, "To court her."

Her jaw drop as if I said ridiculous. Then suddenly she laugh.

"Hindi mo alam manligaw?" she unexpetedly ask while laughing.

I scratch my nape, "Y-yeah."

She stopped on laughing and make a face to me. "Siguraduhin mong seryoso ka sa kapatid ko." and she narrowed her eyes.

"Ofcourse I am!"

"Then let's practice."

"Okay!"