Nathan and Micah

Can you see me? Can you hear me?

Song: Insane by Alycium

I strongly suggest listening to the song while you read this as the lyrics heavily inspired the chapter. Also, sorry it's kind of long, I couldn't figure out how to split it.

School is starting soon. I am walking down the concrete path, carefully dodging all of the little kids running around. My eyes scan the playground for Nathan but I can't see him. He is probably inside.

I am sitting in class. My friends and I got here early to make sure we got a good seat. The other students are slowly filing in, but I still can't see Nathan. He said he would be here today, so where is he?

Class has started. Nathan is sitting on the opposite side of the room, surrounded by his other friends. His friends that aren't really mine. I am surrounded by my friends. My friends who aren't really his.

It's recess. I am pushed outside by my friends. I don't like how bright the sun is. I also don't like the fact that Nathan isn't here. My friends are eating and chatting. But I'm not eating and I'm not talking. I want Nathan.

Second period just started. This is my one class where it's just me and Nathan. None of my friends. None of Nathan's. Except, Nathan does have a friend. And he is sitting with him. And I am sitting by myself.

I am trying to build up the courage to talk to Nathan. I don't understand why he is avoiding me. Is he avoiding me? I can't tell. There is no one in the classroom apart from Nathan, his friend and myself. The only sounds are those of Nathan laughing. He never laughs like that with me.

Second period is about to end. I am packing up my stuff when Nathan taps me on the shoulder. He doesn't say anything, just hands me a pen that he borrowed a few days ago. Then he goes running after his friend. What did I do wrong, Nathan?

It's lunch now. All of my friends have tutoring with Nathan's older brother. I need to find Nathan, one half of me says. But the other says, Just leave him alone. He will come when he wants.
I don't know which side to listen to.

Just as third period starts, I decide which side to listen to. I am waiting outside the science lab. I am alone. Nathan is with his friends. We are all early. 7 minutes to be exact. I make eye contact with him and gesture for him to come over to me. He pushes through his crowd of friends to stand next to me. And that's when the teacher comes to let us into the classroom.

Third period is over. As soon as it ended, Nathan rushed out of the classroom. We normally go together, but I guess not today. I am left alone in the classroom to clean up, but I need to take the bus. With Nathan. I push the thought out of my mind and quickly finish cleaning.

I ran at full speed to get to the bus stop but I was still too late. I guess I am waiting for the next one. I sit on the bench. I can feel the cool metal, even through my jeans. There is only one other person at the bus stop but they are on the opposite side. They slowly start moving closer.

The other person is now right beside me. It's Nathan. I am trying to stay calm even though I am really angry with him. He goes to say something but I cut him off, "Why were you avoiding me today?"
He doesn't reply, only looks at me with his dark brown eyes. His beautiful, dark brown eyes. This is no time to be thinking about how beautiful his eyes are, Micah!
"Answer my question, Nathan!"

"What question? What has gotten into you today? You have barely said a word to me. Are you ok?"
"N-Nathan? What are you talking about? You are the one who hasn't spoken to me."

"Micah, you are going insane. It's why I love you so much." Nathan pulls me in for a kiss. I still don't really understand what is happening but it's ok. It doesn't matter that I am going insane. I'm with Nathan now and that is all I need.