SIBLINGS-IN-LAW:LOVE & CONSEQUENCES

FIFTY

NTOMBENHLE MNISI

'Umangisuka kuwona
Lomhlaba o' mdala
Ngizohamba nginokujabula
Ngobu Jesu uzongingenisa
Ngale
Endaweni lapho ngo phumula'

The family and friends are singing in the living room. I was supposed to be sitting down on a mattress but I cannot due to my stitches so, I was given the bed. The family had to disorganise the living room and removed most of the furniture to make space for the bed and also a mattress where by Yoniswa is sitting. Even if it wasn’t for my stitches, I would have been given a different mattress to sit on, I can’t share the same with Yoniswa, I am the wife here.

We arrived here in Bhisho last night and also transferred our children in the morgue around Bhisho. Both of them will be buried here, as it was Luyolo’s decision, I had no problem with that but traveling with a new born baby when I am still in stitches and also know less about handling the baby was a complete mission for me but, my husband is such an amazing person, we made stops here and there so that he can take care of his copy. Damn! You carry a baby for almost a year, he comes out to look like his father like he was trying to prove a point or something as if his father ever denied him.

I know I also lost a baby but, I can never compare my pain to Yoniswa’s. At least she got to bond with his son, they shared so much many memories and although Yoniswa has her own demons, she is deeply hurt by all of this. I actually feel for her but then, Lindokuhle was my son too, I am very hurt by his passing. I want to be strong for my husband but, how do you do that when he ignoring his own pain, just like the day I gave birth, he didn’t want to be checked as he struggled to breathe until he collapsed to the floor, I was so angry at him because, he did that on his own.

Speaking of witch, there he comes looking all brave and strong but, that’s my husband guys, I know him. He is dying inside.

“Are you still good? The private investigator says he has the information about how and who burned our house. We will solve that when we get to Joburg. And, the house insurance company has investigated our house and apparently, our bedroom, study room and the entertainment room didn’t catch so much fire so, most of our things are still good, our documents too. They will start fixing the house immediately.” That’s good but, that’s just material things. Our children are never returning. I just nod.
“I need to use the bathroom, please help me up.” He is very careful when he does that, I prefer him more than anyone.

We walk to the bathroom, he helps me sit on the toilet seat so that I can release; I am holding on to him very tight.

“I am done.” I say.
“Okay.” He takes a piece of tissue paper, then helps me back up again before wiping me and then flush the tissue away. We wash our hands before going out.

“Can we talk?” I ask while stopping on my tracks.
“About?”
“You baby. You are pretend to everyone that you are okay when you are actually not. You don’t have to pretend to me baby. Talk out your feelings on me.” He shakes his head. “Luu, a lot has happened in one day. You got demoted, our house burned to ashes and we lost two kids, all in one day!” I start crying. He pulls me for a hug carefully minding my stitches. “Baby it hurts, it hurts so bad!”
“I know mommy, I know.” He squeeze me a little. “I just don’t know how to react to all of this honey, I don’t know what I should do to. It’s like I am going to wake up from this bad dream and I feel so sure about it. Mommy what should I do.”
“Break things if you have to, just don’t shut your feelings, especially from me. You can open up to me.” He looks up the space, probably fighting back the tears. “Babe, talk to me.” He cups my face and wipes my tears using his thumbs. The cries of my baby from one of the bedrooms.

Bad Timing!

My husband was about to open up to me and that would have made him a little lighter but, my baby had to disturb this moment. He gives me a baby kiss before he holds me as we walk to the bedroom. We find baby Enzo sucking on his fist, he is hungry.

“Sit here and I will get him.” He helps me sit on the one sitter couch before he gets Enzokuhle from the bed.
“He is beautiful.” He is. “There is a little bit of Lindokuhle in him.” I nod.
“He took after you, that’s why.” He hands me the baby, I tuck my full boob in his mouth for him to suck it, I still can’t get use to the feeling, if you know what I mean. He starts squelching as he sucks the milk out, he must be enjoying the milk. I wonder how it tastes like.

Luyolo heaves a loud sigh before lying on the bed.

“Want to talk about it?” He looks at me as if he is studying me.
“This is not how I imagined things to be. Who would hate me so much to do something like that, something that cost my family. Yes, I make enemies everyday with the line of work that I do, we get competition everyday but, I always avoided trouble sthandwa Sam you know that. But for someone to do me like this? I can’t even point a finger. I lost my sons.” He buries his face in his hands. I hold my baby as my own tears roll down.
“Baby I am so sorry for all of this.” He gets down from the bed and kneels down in front of me holding my legs. He never not once ever expressed himself to me like this. So this shows me how much he is broken and hurt.
“Baby…” I whisper.
“No, Ntombenhle…” Wow, I'm Ntombenhle today? “I am sorry that I dragged you in my mud, this is all my fault. Maybe if we went against our parents and never gotten ourselves in this, this would have been avoided.” I shake my head as I am crying. “Now, I hate that I love you so much.”
“Please don’t talk like that, Luu.” He sits flat on the floor and leans against the bed.
“Maybe we don’t belong together, our marriage has started off with problems. Weird unexplainable things happened. Things took a toll here and there, it was a fuckin' mess.”
“No… Luyolo. I will not sit here and listen to you squabble at me like that. I know you are hurting baby but don’t do this to us. We are happy together and we can make it work. We have our son that needs us both please don’t say that.” The door opens, Luyolo’s mother walks in.

“Oh my babies, I came to check up on you. Your family has arrived. And also your colleagues. Go and I will take care of Enzokuhle.” She takes him from my arms. Luyolo wipes his face. Even though he tries to hide it from everyone, his bloodshot eyes will tell it all.

He helps me up as we go out from the room.

***

Two days later, we are sitting at the cemetery under the stretch tent. I am sitting next to my husband with our hands intertwined. He is squeezing it every now and then maybe to assure me that everything will be okay. But, after that night, u don’t think so. My sister is sitting on the other side of my hand brushing my back. We brought baby Enzokuhle also, oh my poor baby. He is not even a week old but here he is burying his twin and older brother. The pastor then calls out for the Mayiza family to come forward with Enzokuhle as the coffins are about to go six feet under, I can’t help but wail out loud.

“Phephisa sisi.” They say while others are trying to fan me with the programs. “Give her water!” Someone shouts.
“We are not supposed to-be-bur-ing them! It is… wrong!” I try to catch my breath. “Who is supposed to bury us if our children die before us, oh Lindokuhle…” I don’t stop wailing.
Siboniso takes my peaceful sleeping baby Enzo from the stroller and goes forward next to Lethukuhle, his Twin's grave. He carefully puts Enzokuhle on top of Lethukuhle's casket.

'Amagugu Alelizwe
Ayosal' emathuneni
Amagugu Alelizwe
Ayosal’ emathuneni
Ngiyolala ngingedwa
Ethuneni lami…'

I think the song triggered Luyolo because, he just removed my hand from his before burying his face in his hands and starts crying. I put my hand on his back and softly brush him. I have collected myself for him now.

My heart aches when the caskets are being rolled down with my baby still on Lethu's coffin. Siboniso prays and chants to the ancestors to release Lethukuhle from Enzokuhle as he is at his final place. It is a thing that black cultures do when one twin dies and the other has to go down the grave so that they can separate them. I just hope that they make no mistake with my baby down there. He screams as they take him out, they quickly hand him over to me. No one would miss the fact that he is still a new born baby, he still folds himself like a foetus and still has his eyes closed. He doesn’t stop crying and I also can’t be breastfeeding him here. Luyolo collects himself before taking him from my arms to rock him to sleep, just until we get home.

‘Joko ya hao e bo bebe
E nkgatholola pelo
Tumelo ho nna ke thebe
Etla mphemisa lefu
Nyakallo ke e fumane
Tseleng ya hao Morena
Dira ho nna di qhalane
Ke hloletswe ke wena

O re ho’na ke lelale
Ke tshephe lehodimo
Moeti ha a kgathale
O pepjwa ke Modimo
Efela o dutse jwale
E sa le o nthatile
O mphodisitse matswalo
‘Me jwale ke thabile

Ho tla ba jwang ha ke siya
Kobo ena e bolang
Ke be jwalo ka Eliya
Ka koloi e fofang?
Ke tla opa ka diatla
Ke tla re: Haleluya
Halleluya ho senatla
Se nkenyang ho Jehova.’

They sang the song while we were going to throw soil into both graves before they close the up. Luyolo gave the baby to my mother and then helped me up. I balanced myself holding on to his arm as we sauntered to throw the soil in the graves.

“Le… Lethu. Baby… mommy never got a chance to hold you. I am sorry I couldn’t protect you but know that mommy will always love you okay.” Luyolo squeeze my shoulder. “Oh Lindokuhle, I am deeply broken my baby, you had so much to live for and for your life to be taken away like that, I don’t think I will ever get used to not having you around. I miss you so much and know that mommy Enhle will always love you, you and your brother Lethu. Rest in peace my babies…” we threw the sand before walking back.

Yoniswa and her mother make their way to the grave, I don’t know if it is me or I am seeing things. Yoniswa looks only partly alive like, she is not interested on what is happening nor look bothered. She hardly said a lot from day one, she hardly cried for her son . Or maybe everyone has a way of grieving, I don’t know.

***

LUYOLO MAYIZA

We just got back home from the cemetery, Ntombenhle and I went straight to our flat so that she can breastfeed Enzokuhle who is only five days old and already been through a lot. My wife and I are not actually in good terms right now and I can tell that she has so much to say but, she is deciding against it. It is good, I also don’t want to talk. I meant what I said to her the other day.

“What is going to happen from here on?” She asks as she breastfeeds our son on the bed.
“Meaning?” I also ask as I take off my formal shoes to change to sneakers.
“We don’t have a home to go back to. Are we going to stay here or find another place while our house is getting fixed?”
“I don’t know.” I shrug. “You can go to your parents’ house if you want to.”
“Luyolo are you still interested in us? Do you still want to make us work? Do you want us to work on our marriage or you going to push me away?” Her voice breaks. “You can’t even look at me, Yolo. I am sorry if you are blaming me for what happened. I am sorry that my sorry won’t bring back our kids. I am sorry that I didn’t run away at the aisle. I am sorry for coming into your life and I am sorry that I can’t turn back the time. I love you and, I won’t apologise for that. We are in too deep, we have a baby that needs us both. Why do you have to make him suffer?” I bury my hands deep in my pockets and look up closing my eyes.
“I am going out.” I say walking out from our bedroom.
“Luyolo Mayiza we not done talking!” The baby starts crying. “Luyolo!”
“Well I AM DONE! DONE TALKING AND DONE WITH THIS MARRIAGE!” She gasp with her eyes widened. I leave l walk out leaving her. I don’t think I still want this marriage.

***

NOMATHEMBA MNISI

I am sitting with my husband, Busani. This is my first time coming to Bhisho. Remember when my daughter was having the traditional wedding, I couldn’t come and attend her wedding due to “tradition”? Well, today I am here and I must say that, this village here is very spacious. The land is big and the homes are very much far apart from each other, it looks dangerous. I know it’s too farfetched but, imagine living alone and someone breaks to your house, there is no way that you can get help that easy.

I see Siboniso approaching us, I hope he is not coming to start off some trouble to cause my husband to throw a fit.

“The Mnisi. How are you?” Siboniso asks.
“I am going to check out on my daughter.” I stand up. “It’s good to see you, Siboniso.” I walk away living them. I bump into Zozibini.

“Well, well, well. I must say, whatever muthi (voodoo) that you are using, it is really working. How is it that till today, the man you call your HUSBAND, still doesn’t know that, Ntombenhle is not really his daughter but, his best friend’s?” I gasp. She chuckles. “What? You thought I didn’t know? Well, I did my own calculations from the first day but, Siboniso also told me.”
“If the truth means so much to you, go ahead and tell Siboniso and see if I give a damn.” I cluck my tongue.
“Careful, Noms. Your wish might come true.” To be honest, if the truth has to come out, it should come out from me. I walk away going to my daughter and his husband’s flat, I find Luyolo standing outside smoking a cigarette.

“Hello son.” He throws the almost half cigarette to the ground. “You don’t have to worry about me. I completely understand.” He nods.
“You can go in, ma.” I nod.
“Thank you.” I sigh. “It is going to take a long time to heal. Just be strong for Enzokuhle.” I hold his shoulder before I walk into their flat.

“Enhle?” I call out as I walk in further. I reach their room and I can hear her sobbing softly. I open the door, I find her sitting upright with Enzokuhle laying on her chest, maybe sleeping.
“What is wrong? Argh my baby, it’s going to be okay. I can guarantee you that it will get better in time.” She cries more. I take the baby from her and put him in the crib. “Talk to me Enhle.”
“Mama take me home with you, please, I want to come back home. My marriage is falling apart.” She whimpers. I wish to pull her for a hug but, I am scared I might hurt her where she I stitched below her stomach from the caesarian. I settle into holding her alhands.
“Are you going to let it fall apart?” Jeez, what am I saying? Maybe it’s a good thing they go separate.
“Luyolo is… is giving up on us.”
“Sshh my love. It’s going to be okay, don’t cry so much you will give yourself a headache.” I wipe her tears. I wipe my tears too. I don’t know what to say because, my guilt I eating me now. I decide to remain silent. Luyolo walks in. He clears his throat before he talks.
“Sorry to disturb but, there is a family meeting right now at the house. We are all needed.” He looks at Ntombenhle and sighs. “You can stay, you will get a brief about the meeting.” He goes out.
“When are you going to the hospital to remove the stitches?” I ask.
“I am supposed to go on Monday. Luyolo booked me to a hospital in town.”
“Okay. Let me leave you now. I will call your sister who made lots of Xhosa friends here to come and babysit you.”
“Ma! I don’t need a babysitter. And, I am not a baby.” She sneers, I chuckle.
“You are my baby, and I am still calling your sister.” She smiles just a little. “I didn’t know that Luyolo smokes.”
“Uyaphapha nje. He smokes only when he tries to escape from reality.” (He is being forward.)

***

NARRATOR

Everyone was now settled in the living room waiting for the meeting to start. MaKhulu, Luyolo’s grandmother is the one leading the meeting. A seer is also present in the meeting.

“It was a very successful dignified burial of my great-grandchildren today and we need to thank the Lord for that. It is very sad that I, myself had to live longer than them. How I wish to exchange my life with theirs. Anyway, I called you all here to tell you that, we are doing the cleansing tomorrow so that we can all move on from this.” With that being said, the seer starts incarnating and groaning.
“This could have been avoided…” He sneezes.
“Makhosi.” Everyone says looking confused.
“What are you saying, Makhosi.” MaKhulu asks.
“They don’t listen. They were told to tell the truth or else, innocent souls were going to be lost.” He shakes his head clapping his hands.
“Who are you talking about?” Luyolo asks?
“Boy, do not disturb me. I am trying to communicate with the ancestors.” The seer sneers. “The truth must come out today, right now!” He groans. Nomathemba's heart beat increases it’s pace. He shoots his eyes to where Siboniso is sitting, right next to Zozibini hoping to meet Siboniso's eyes but, she meets Zozibini's gaze.
“What truth?” MaKhulu asks.
“The ancestors demand a ritual. For a long lost daughter of the Mayiza.” The seer raise his head and looks at Nomathemba, Nomathemba shakes her head with tears falling out of her eyes.
“Mama, what’s wrong?” Busani asks her.
“I am sorry baba. I am very sorry that I lied to you for so many years. I am so sorry.” Nomathemba cries holding his hands.
“You are wasting everyone’s time Nomathemba!” Zozibini says, sounding annoyed or, it’s because she knew what was going on-what the seer was on about.
“The Mayiza wants to claim what belongs to them or they won’t stop making it difficult for the family.” The seer emphasise.
“What are you apologise for, mama. You are scaring me.” Busani says.
“Son, please give us some space and leave us the adults.” Siboniso says to Luyolo.
“Dad, if it has something to do with me and my family, I am not going anywhere.” He scoffs.
“LUYOLO I AM NOT ASKING YOU, JUST LEAVE!” Luyolo’s father roars.
“FINE!” He storms out very angry. He goes straight to his flat and walks to the kitchen. He opens up the cabinets and looks in them until he finds a bottle of whiskey. He takes it and goes to the bedroom, he finds Ntombenhle sleeping with the baby cot pulled next to the bed with the sleeping Enzokuhle. He sighs and then goes to Lindokuhle’s bedroom, he leaves the door open.

He opens the bottle before sitting on the bed. He looks around the room, his eyes burn from the tears. He drinks the whiskey from the bottle and let’s his tears fall. He goes on and cries silently. Someone knocks from the front door but, he ignores it and drinks his hot whiskey. The person let’s themselves in and walks in further, they see the bedroom open and knocks, but walks in anyway without waiting for response.

“Hi.” Luyolo looks at the person, it’s Yoniswa. “I came to bid my goodbye.” She swallows hard as guilt hits her.
“Come here.” Luyolo pulls his hand forward to Yoniswa, she hesitantly goes to him and sits next to him on the bed. He puts his bottle down. “We lost our son.”
“I’m sorry. I-I shouldn’t be in here…” Her tears roll down her eyes.
“No, please stay with me.” Luyolo holds her hand.
“Your wife too lost a child, you should be with her. You don’t deserve to be with me.”
“But I want you here. You and I shared a soul. Let’s lie down here silently for a while.” He says while resting his body on the bed, Yoniswa joins him. He pulls her closer and spoons her.
“You are drunk.” She says.
“I know…” The fall asleep.

In the house, everyone was shocked to the news except for Makhulu, Zozibini, Nomathemba and Siboniso. They didn’t know how to react to the situation. Busani was full of rage.

“She is my daughter! I raised her!” He shouts. “I always knew that she was not my daughter but, now that you admit that you played me for a fool I want to kill you! Both of you!”
“I am so sorry baba, please forgive me…” Nomathemba cries.
“Shut up, SHUT UP!” You continued playing me for a fool meeting up in hotels angithi, I still forgave you and now you want to take my baby away from me, I will NOT allow that.” He chuckles. “My best friend and my wife…”
“We didn’t mean to.” Siboniso says.
“Yet, after so many years you did it again.” He shook his head. “I am leaving.”
“Please baba, let’s talk about this!”
“I am done talking!”
“Calm down man.” Siboniso utters. Busani shoots murderous daggers at him. He clucks his tongue before going out.

“Dad, are you leaving? Dad, wait! Dad?” Mbalenhle calls out to him but he just keeps going ignoring her. He gets in the car and then drives off leaving dust behind.
“O-KAY! That was weird. Do you think that something made him angry?” Promise, Lubabalo’s wife asks.
“Whatever it is, we not involving ourselves. By the way, where is your sister, Yvonne?” Lubabalo asks.
“We were supposed to have left with our parents but, she said she has something to do before we leave.” Yvonne answers.
“I think I should go and check on my sister.” Mbalenhle says.
“I am coming with you.” Lubabalo says as they both get up. “I need to talk to my brother.” They both left.

In the house now it was only Nomathemba, Zozibini, MaKhulu and Siboniso.

“Can you please stop crying Nomathemba, you did this to yourself and you are starting to annoy us now.” Zozibini Huffs sounding annoyed.
“Just shut up Zozibini.” MaKhulu warns her. “Siboniso, I told you about this, in fact I warned you. Now, both of you waited for the worst to happen, look now. Call the children in, we need to tell them the truth now.”

They all go quiet.

“Zozibini, can you please call them.”
“I feel sorry for Khanyisile now.” She says as she goes out to their flat.

When she gets there, she finds the house full of noise. Lubabalo, Luyolo and Mbalenhle were quarrelling.

“What is this noise all about? We just buried two children for goodness sake but already you are cat and mousing! Argh man.”
“Tell that to your son ma. The bodies are not even cold but already he is spooning with his ex while the wife was sleeping!” Mbalenhle shouts before going to her sister in the bedroom.
“Luyolo, is that true?” She slaps him behind his head. “You can be stupid sometimes. Go to the house, you are needed in there. Lubabalo, come and help me with Ntombenhle, she is needed in there too.” Luyolo goes out. Lubabalo and Zozibini goes into the bedroom, they find Ntombenhle crying.

“Khanyi, I am so sorry baby, okay.” Zozibini says. “Can we help you up, we need you in the house, it is very important.”  Ntombenhle nods.
“I will stay with Enzo, it’s okay.” Mbalenhle offers.

“I just want you both to know that, I am very sorry deep down from the bottom of my heart. I was young and stupid but, that is now excuse for what I did. I love you so much my baby and I would do anything to protect you but also, I will understand if you going to hate me.” Nomathemba turns and looks at the drunk Luyolo who looks bored. “Son, I loved you like my own son. Thank you for loving my daughter the way you do…” Luyolo chuckles.
“Is there anything funny?” Siboniso asks him, he shakes his head. “Nomathemba, I will take it from here.” He takes a deep breath. “What we are going to tell you, it is not easy for everyone but, we hope that you find it in your heart to forgive us.”
“What is it?” Ntombenhle finally finds her voice to speak.
“I am so sorry…” Nomathemba cries all over again causing Zozibini to roll her eyes.
“We… I am-I am your father. You are siblings.” Luyolo bursts into a loud laugh even his eyes get teary. Ntombenhle looks so shocked. When they both see that they are serious, Luyolo stops laughing.
“Wait, what? Are you serious?” He becomes soba same time. “This is sick!”
“No…” Ntombenhle shakes her head. “NO! NO! NO!” She starts crying. Luyolo storms out of the house trying to register what was being said.