The Therapist and Her Patience.

Chapter 18

I walk upstairs and hand Mattia his bag. "Thanks." Is his response. He doesn't try anything on. He just takes the stuff out of the bag and stuffs it in the suitcase. And walks it down the stairs and places it next to mine. I'm not sure what to do anymore so I go to take a shower. I get in the steaming shower. I start to feel that pain again in my lower back from the cuts. The last time I was in the shower I didn't feel them burn because Mattia had me distracted. I place my hand over them softly to try and sooth the pain. I hear a knock at the door. " Yes?" " You need company?" I think for a little I wanna say yes but I don't want to do anything. " I don't feel like doing anything right now Tia." " That wasn't my question. I asked if you wanted company." "Sure" I tell him. He comes in and opens the curtain. He gets in and stands there. " Here lemme help." He says while grabbing the soap he spreads it on my back. He's rubbing the soap in and he gets down to where the cuts are. I hasn't noticed them yet so he continues to massage the soap into my back. I move up " Not there." I tell him. He wipes of the soap and sees a ton of little cuts. " What's this?" He asks me " Why are these here. Why did you do that to yourself. Have you stopped?" He flutters me with questions he doesn't give me time to answer. Then after 10 questions he stops talking waiting for my answer. " Mattia you don't understand. I-" He cuts me off " I don't understand?" He shows me his inner thigh. It's filled with cuts. " I don't want you to do it anymore. Got it." " Mattia it's not that easy to quit. I've tried." I explain. He kisses me on my neck. It's not rough and it's not indicating he wants anything. The kiss was full of love. "Your perfect. Ok. I don't want you messing your body up." He gives me one more kiss. And then grabs his towel and leaves. Now I know why I chose B instead of A