Taming Yoongi

An Empty Feeling

        As soon as I got outside I walked into an alley and sat down on the dirty ground. This was the reason I hated getting involved with girls. They lead you on and then they leave you as soon as they find another guy. Every girl is exactly the same.

       I don’t know how long I sat there or what I was even thinking about. All I could feel was emptiness. It was like there was a giant piece of me missing. I felt one tear roll down my cheek and the only thing I remember thinking before I passed out was that it was really cold.

       I woke up to someone shaking me and saying my name. I slowly opened my eyes and looked up at the person. When my eyes finally focused I recognized Seokjin and smiled.

       “Hyung,” I said in a weak whisper.

       Seokjin sat down beside me. For a while we just sat there in silence before Seokjin finally spoke. “Yoongi I saw what happened.” I groaned and started to try and get up. “Wait. I need you to listen to me.” I looked over at Seokjin and saw how serious he looked.

       I sat back down and leaned against the alley wall. “I can’t tell you that Minji didn’t do anything wrong and I can’t tell you that it will all work out.” I didn’t see where this was going but I was to tired to get up and leave. “All I can tell you is that I have never seen you like a girl as much as you like Minji. Every time she was around your eyes light up and you almost smile just a little.” Seokjin let out a sad laugh. “I’m just trying to say I think you need to talk to her.”

       I looked at Seokjin and could see he was sincere but I just couldn’t believe him. How could I like a girl that betrayed me like that? Of all the people she could have picked to ditch me for she picked Namjoon. I felt my anger boiling up again.

       “And Yoongi, there’s one more thing I have to tell you.” I tried to calm down and looked over at Seokjin. “I’m moving to Seoul.” He looked at me and I saw a sad look in his eyes.

       It took me a minute to process what he said but as soon as I did I felt my anger come up in a second wave. “Why! Are you just going to leave now too? You’ve been here all your life and you just decide to leave now!” I screamed and got up from the ground.

       Seokjin looked up at me and I saw worry fill his eyes. ”I’m going to train to be an actor.” The words hit me like a punch in the face. I didn’t even know he wanted to be an actor. “I leave tomorrow. I was going to tell you sooner but I didn’t want to make you upset.” Seokjin got up and stood beside me in the alley way. “Yoongi, I want you to be careful okay. I want you to go after your dreams and make sure you come visit me when you get to Seoul.”

       Seokjin ruffled my hair and walked out of the alley and back towards the club. I stood there in shock for a few minutes and when I finally regained my senses I started to make my way towards my house. I didn’t know what to do. What are you supposed to do when everyone around you is leaving you? The only thing I knew how to do was go home.

       When I reached my house I went straight upstairs to my room and took a shower. I made sure I got all of the paint off me and when it was finally all gone I felt just a little better. The minute I got out of the shower I flopped down on my bed and fell asleep within seconds.

       The entire next day I sat around in my room and did nothing. I worked on a few songs that I ended up hating two seconds after they were done. I listened to music but it only made me mad. So for most of the day I laid on my bed and tried to figure out how I really felt but I only switched back and forth between loneliness and anger. A few times my mom came to check on me and ask what was wrong but I just yelled and sent her out of my room. I just wanted to continue to be alone.

        I went outside only once to go to the park. I sat on a bench and watched all the people walk by. Some of them were mad and walked past yelling into their cellphone. Other people were happy and would hum as they walked past. Most of the people that walked past were teenagers out on dates that were just as happy as they could be. Inside I laughed at them because none of that would last but they didn’t know it. On the outside I just looked at them with envy and continued to sit on the bench alone.

When I went home it was almost midnight and I had school the following morning so I laid down on my bed and went to sleep. At least in my dreams I didn’t feel so lonely.

        The next morning when my mom woke me up like usual I didn’t complain and I didn’t get mad I just got dressed and went to school. At least going to school gave me something to do. When I got to school I just walked into my classroom, sat at my desk and looked out the window. It was a beautiful day. There weren’t any clouds in the sky and the sun was shining brightly. I hated it.

        As I was staring out the window I heard someone enter the classroom and when I looked at the door I saw Namjoon. I felt immediate anger boil up in me and I would have probably gotten in to another fight if Taehyung hadn’t barged in to the classroom right then.

        “Hyung.” He said as he walked up to my desk.

        I glared at him. “What do you want Taehyung?”

        He looked at me and tried scrunched up his eyebrows to try and look like he was mad. “What happened between you and Minji at the concert last night?” He questioned.

        Shocked I stood up and dragged him out of the classroom into the hallway. When we were in the hallway I looked around to make sure no one was nearby. “Look I don’t know what you heard but there is nothing between me and Minji and nothing happened last night okay.”

        He didn’t look like he believed me. I sighed. “Just ask Minji.” I told him.

       “Hyung, didn’t you know? Minji’s not here.” He looked at me like it was my fault.

        “I guess she did something stupid again. It’s not my problem.” I was getting ready to walk back into the classroom when Namjoon walked out. He took a look at me and Taehyung.

        “Hey kid.” He said to Taehyung. “I need you to get out of here.”

        Taehyung looked back and forth between me and Namjoon before running off down the hallway back towards his classroom.

        Namjoon looked at me at glared. “I need to talk to you about Minji.”

        I felt my anger rise at the sound of her name and I knew this conversation wasn’t going to end well.