My Rockstar

Hugs

I wake up and I feel like last year wasn't real. Until I was interrupted by feeling sick. I run to the bathroom and lean down to the toilet. I groan and I look over at the door as it opens. "Did you..?" I shake my head at Jaden. He nods, "I'll go get some medicine and a drink. Water?" I nod and smile, "Thank you." He smiles and leaves. I hurry to get my phone and go back to the toilet and scroll through insta. I see people posting pictures of me I don't remember taking. "Here," I jump, not knowingJaden was right next to me. He holds his hand out and I give my phone and he sets it on the counter. "Can you like... put the pill in my mouth? I'm sorry I just like.. was touching the toilet." He laughs and nods. I look up and open my mouth and he drops the pill in. I take the water and wash it down. I hand the water back to him and he kneels down rubbing my back. "Jaden, you don't have to help me." He nods, "Yeah, I do. I'd be a shitty boyfriend if I didn't." I smile at him. 

Mads came over a few hours ago and I feel better. I don't know how I do since I drank so much, but I do. Mads is leaving now so Jaden and I walk her to her car. I give her a hug and she goes into a hug with Jaden, he hugs back. She lets go of the hug and gets in her car and Jaden is just standing there frozen. "Jaden?" I ask as Mads drives off. "Babe?" I shake him and he shakes his head, "Yeah?" I look at him confused. "Right... I'm going to go to my room and relax." I look at him weird and walk to my room. I sit on the edge of my bed on my phone and Jaden walks in and closes the door. "Y/n?" I look up at him, confused. "Jaden? You okay?" I put my phone down and he sets his phone next to mine and he sits on the floor in front of me. "Actually" he stands up, "Can we go to my room. It won't be as awkward if you walk out of the room." I look at him confused and we walk to his room. He sits on his bed and I stand in front of him. "Jaden? You're worrying me." He nods, "I'm telling you this because I love you. Remember that." I stay quiet, scared of what he was going to say. "When I just hugged Mads... I felt.. something. And I don't know what it was but it was something." I stand there, frozen, as ringing in my ears overtakes Jaden talking. I take a deep breath and as I exhale the ringing stops. "Y/n?" I look at Jaden as I notice him holding my hands to stop me from shaking, something he tends to do a lot. I nod, "Okay... okay, uhm.. that's okay." He shakes his head, "I know it's not. Stop defending me and open up." I nod, "Yeah... I know. I just think... can you, uhm, give me one second?" He lets go of my hands as his eyes tear up. My eyes tear up and I walk out of the room. I close the door and I just hear "Fuck!" with a bunch of banging. I run to my room, I don't even know if I passed anyone while I was running, to be honest. I close my door and sit in my bed. I start overthinking everything.

I'm leaning against my pillow as I'm hugging the stuffed animal Jaden won me from the night he asked me out. I see the door open and look up and it's Jaden. "I, uhm, forgot my phone." I nod and he grabs it and walks to the door. "Jaden?" He turns around and I see his face all red and his eyes all red as well. "Yeah?" His voice says, breaking. I pat on the bed right in front of me and he closes the door and walks over. "Did anything, uhm, happen with you two... or anyone.. while I was gone?" He looks at me like I have 10 heads. "No, of course not. Mads was rarely over. I probably saw her once the past 3 weeks. And any other girl, no. I haven't left your room. The party was the only night I had." I nod, "She told me a week after I stayed at the Hype House that she stayed over there every night in your bed." I say confused. He shakes his head, "Get any boy or girl, I think Avani's here, but still, get anyone of them and they will tell you she stayed over once. Maybe twice." I shake my head. "No, I trust you." He gets up and it's silent. He clears his throat and walks to the door. "I don't want to be alone." He doesn't turn around. "Do you want me to get like... Josh or something. I assume you don't want me holding you." I smile as tears rush down my cheek, "No. I want you to hold me." He closes the door again and turns and smiles as tears rush down his cheek as well. "Ugh, stop," I say laughing, wiping tears as more rush down. "Y/n?" I groan "Stop saying my name like that." He nods and walks over to me. "What?" He shakes his head, "I'll tell you later when I'm holding you." I smile and move over. He lays down and I lay my head on his chest. "Why do you trust me so much?" I shrug, "I just love you so much and I know you love me too. I just hope that your love for me never breaks." He wraps his arm around me. "Well, what I was going to say was that no matter what happens, you're the one. You're the one I want to hold every night and laugh with every day. You're the one I want to move in alone with, marry, have kids, you are the one no matter what. I don't care if you break up with me and I marry someone else. You are the one. I promise you. I can't lose you, Y/n." I smile and laugh. "You're the one for me too. If I was dating anyone else and he confessed that to me, I would've tried to fix it but I know it wouldn't work out so I just give up. But I really need us to work out." He smiles. I look up at him, "Jaden?" I look at him and I get no response. I laugh as I shake my head and lay it back down on his chest. "Good night, I love you."