Agent Alaska: Recollection and Freelancer

"Hell's Angel"

Fade in to Church and Tucker outside Blue Base.

Church: "Tucker, c-come on man, help me. I need to find a way to have her stick around a bit longer."

Tucker: "Oh yeah sure, no problem. Maybe you and your girlfriend can find time to go on a killing spree. Do some real bonding."

Church: "Tucker."

Tucker: "Oh, that's right, not your girlfriend. Alpha's girlfriend. You're just stalking a girl, through multiple planes of existence."

Church: "Hhgh."

Tucker: "Romantically."

Church: "Please, I just need a little more time."

Tucker: "Why, who cares?"

Church: "I do, I'm supposed to do this."

Tucker: "Fine, where is she now?"

Church: "She's with Alpha, and talking with Caboose."

Tucker: "Well that should keep her busy for at least a few minutes. Half an hour if she starts asking Caboose math problems. Or 2 hours if her and her boyfriend have a heated make-out sess-"

Tex, Alpha, and Caboose walks to them.

Tex: "Hey, I'm gonna stick around a while longer."

Church: "You are? I mean... you are?"

Tex: "Yeah. Caboose here said you guys need some help with the tank, so I figured ah, I could help with that too. What can I say, I like the kid."

Caboose: "Plus I paid her a hundred dollars."

Tex: "Yeah, that too."

Tucker: "Money - why didn't I think of that?"

Church: "Because you don't have any money?"

Alpha: "Poor ass."

Tucker: "Good point. Hey Caboose, give me some money!"

Caboose: "Oka- wait. Is this a trick. I'll pay you a hundred dollars to show me how it works."

Alpha: "No. Just don't."

Cut to Grif and Simmons

Simmons: "I can't believe you guys didn't know this was Lopez, and not me."

Grif: "What do you expect, he had the perfect disguise."

Simmons: "He painted himself maroon. Badly!"

Grif: "Exactly! How could anyone be expected to see through that?"

Simmons: "He spoke Spanish, no one else does."

Grif: "That did seem weird at first, but, you always go through those annoying phases. Like, remember that time you were gonna learn to play banjo, or the time you were gonna be a vegan?"

Simmons: "What do you mean phases, I am a vegan. And I can play the banjo."

Grif: "I know, and isn't all that annoying?"

Simmons: "But you couldn't figure it out. Hawh, you don't know me at all."

Grif: "To be fair, we didn't know Lopez either. We knew you both equally as little, so, you can see how we'd get confused. Also, we didn't really care."

Simmons: "Yeah, but Lopez was here a day. I've been here for years."

Grif: "You have? See, I'm learning new stuff about you already. Now the next time an evil robot tries to take your place, I'll have questions to ask it."