Live Through the Pain - Kagehina Angst

Chapter thirty - Home

Hinata POV

"So you want to go back?"
"...Yes."
"Why'de you hesitate?"
"...."
"Why won't you answer me?"
"Well...I suppose it's bacause I'm scared."
"Scared of what? Being alive?"
"...I'm not sure..."
"I see."
"Who are you anyway?"
"Can't you see me?"
"No...I can't. Everythings dark."
"Why don't you open your eyes?"
"What do you mean?"
"Your eyes are closed. Open them."

Slowly, I managed to open my eyes, and was met with a room. The room was dark, but comfortably so. The only light streamed through an open window. There were more windows, but the blinds were shut. The room was cozy, in some sense. There was nothing in it, but it had a very relaxing aura. It sort of felt like hot cocoa after a long day in the snow, or maybe the warm smell of cinnomin. Yet at the same time, icecream on a hot summers day, or the smell of mint. It was...for lack of better word - weird. But not in a bad way. I was sitting in a smal hamock, gazing at the sillouette of a small figure infront of me.

"Can you see me now?" The figure said. Whoever it was, had a very small and childlike voice.
"I...I still can't see you. You're in the dark."
"Oh well in that case...."

I heard them take a step forward, into the light.

I inhaled sharply.

The person in front of me was short. Very short. They had a head of wild ginger hair, wich seemed to glow warmly in the soft light. Almost like a halo. They had large curious caramel colored eyes, that glimmered with life. The person grinned at me. When they smiled, I could see they had two teeth missing.
That person was just a small child.
A small child....who was me.
It was me. When I was several years younger.
I couldn't have been...more then five or six.

"So I'm guessing you're me?" The kid asked.
Guess I wasn't too bright when I was tiny either huh....
"Um...yeah. How-how am I....or Why are you.....Where are we?"
"No idea!" He shrugged. He giggled like he had just stole candy from his sister (which I had done on multiple occasions).
I sighed. "Look....what are you doing here..."
"No idea!"
Well this isn't helpful....

"Hey mister?"
"Um yeah? Also just call me Shoyo."
"But I'm Shoyo silly!"
"....Fine."
"Anywayyyyyy I gotta question to ask!"
"Ask away."
"Why do you look so sad?"

I froze.
"Oh....well..."

The little boy frowned and looked at his sneakers. Well, my sneakers. Whatever.
"You...you're from the future aren't you?"
"....I suppose yeah."
"I don't think I exist mister....." He pouted.
"What?"
"Well it's not like I have body of my own! I'm just goin off your memories here!"
"..I see..."
"Hey tell me something...."
"Shoot.."
"Are mom...and dad still fighting?"
"....It's complicated...."
"Oh....that's not an answer you know."
"Well...they seperated for a bit..."
"Oh....is Natsu still as annoying is ever?"
"Hah yeah a little bit...."
"You sound sad when you talk about her....is she okay?"
"I...I don't think so...."
"Why not?!"
"...."
"Did something happen to us or something?!"
Wow he catches on quick....
"What about mom? Is she okay? and dad?"
"I can't....tell you...."
"Why not?"
"Moms....dead. And we....I think we are too..."
"Oh...was it...was it painful? Dying I mean...."
"It was....."
"I'm...scared of dying...I don't want to die! I want to live forever! But you...you said you're scared of living...what is that supposed to mean?"
"It's hard to explain kiddo...."
"Did we atleast...have friends? I don't have any friends...."
That's right....before I met Koji and Izumi I didn't play with other kids that much..."
"Yeah-we- we had friends....We had..we had alot of friends!"
"That's good to know....did we have a best friend?"
"Yeah we did. He was amazing."
"Really? What was his name!"
"Kageyama. His name was Kageyama."
"What did he look like?"
"He had dark blue eyes and jet black hair. He was also super tall. And he yelled alot, but I was fine with it. He was-he was my best friend. No. He is my best friend."
He's more then a best friend.
"Don't you want to see him again?"
"...yeah I do."
"Again with th hesitation!"
"Lay off."
"What does that mean?"
"Nevermind."
"So why don't you go back and see him?"
"It's not that simple...I cant-"
"Who says you can't!"
"Well that's not how it works-"
"C'mon who cares?! If you want to go back then just go back!"
I sighed. "I wish that's how the world works but it's not...."
"Well this is all in your own head! So this is your world! Do what you want! Go crazy! Just go home!"
"Go....go home huh."
"Yeah! What's stopping you?!"
"...."
"You do want to don't you?"
"Of course I do...."
"Well then hurry and go home! I bet your friends are waiting for you! And whats his name...Kageyama? I bet he misses you! Since you were best friends and all! Don't you think you should go back to him? Go home?"
"I should....go home. Go to Kageyama..."
"Yup you got it!"
"I..."
"Well I got to go now! I dunno how this whole mind/spirit thing works or whatever but Bye!"
"Bye...."