Fearless (1 of 3)

He killed it!

Winter...

Yesterday...what can I say. It was a day. A day that started like any other, awfully normal. One of those that we had hundredths of in here. And it ended in a nightmare. It ended in the most painful way it could. I never imagined that inside this Glade filled with people, I could feel so alone. I've lost three closest people in my life yesterday. They were the only thing close to a family that I ever had. Actually, they were the only family that I ever remembered. 

I lost my biological sister to the maze once those doors closed. I lost my best friend, who was unconscious last time I saw him. And I lost a boy that was more than compatible with me. Minho understood. I was never into physical relationships and Minho accepted that. He understood and that is rare to find. Thomas wasn't in the Glade even long enough to really find his place here. And...I lost Newt. Once those walls closed they took a part of the sweet, caring boy that I knew and locked it in with my sister, friend, and boyfriend. 

I basically lost everyone I cared about. I tried talking to Newt that night. Taking it like I needed to be the strong one for him...for everyone. But Newt was too set in his mind. He lost all the hope. And so I decided to give him space. I know he needs to pull himself together as fast as possible. He is the second in command. Now the order of this Glade is on his shoulders and he can't lose his head on us. 

I decided to sleep in my hammock this night. Going to Minho's room just didn't feel right. But being right next to Summer's hammock wasn't any better. The whole night I kept tossing and turning. It surely can't be counted as a quality night sleep. But really I wasn't the only one. 

I think that no one slept tonight. Everyone was mostly just laying in their hammock. Either in the Homestead or by the gardens. Most of the night I just listened to Chuck mumbling something softly to himself. I had the urge to get up and hug him. But I never did. Newt was occupying my mind as well. He walking around the Glade until midnight and when he finally stopped he went to sit down under the tree where he and Summer used to go quite often. 

It was a dreadful night, honestly. I was looking at the dried blood on the knuckles of my right hand. I might have accidentally, on purpose smashed my hand into a maze wall when everyone disappeared. Just to let some steam. After like five punches the pain became a bit too much. 

The sun wasn't even fully up when Chuck's hammock started moving. He had a hammock on the other side of Summer's so it was easy to see him. He sat up and looked around. Slipping his shoes on he jumped from the hammock and started walking out of the Homestead. I propped myself on my elbows looking after him quizzically. This boy has to always be forced out of his bed and now he is up sooner than most of us. 

"Chuckie? Where are you going?" I asked quietly so I won't wake others. Chuck turned around startled. 

"Oh...um...I was going to the walls. They will be opening soon." Chuck answered. I sighed. I am not sure if it is the best thing for Chuck to go there. When the walls open there is no saying what they will reveal. And I don't Chuck to be mentally scarred for life. 

"Chuck," I sat up in my hammock and looked at the curly-haired child. "I don't think you should go there." I tried to reason with him. Already reaching for my shoes that were under my hammock. 

"But I want to be the first one to be there to greet them when they make it back," Chuck said walking towards the walls. I jogged after him. The child was way too optimistic. But it was cute and maybe even a bit refreshing to see someone still believing. 

"They are not gonna be there Chuck." A grim, accented voice said from behind us. We both turned around to be met with Newt who was leaning against the tree. His hands in his pockets and his face pale. I saw one faint line on his cheek that still glimmered from the tear that fell down it not too long ago. "They are gone."