Not Now

Part 14

Lindsey's POV

~

As soon as I see Stevie, I want to turn around and leave. For a quick second maybe. I don't want to leave though, I wan to run to her and pull her into my arms, beg her to come back. This past week or so has been incredibly tough. She's the first thing on my mind in the morning, the last one, when I go to bed. I've wanted to at least send her a message, make sure she's doing okay, but I've stopped myself every time. She chose to leave, she clearly doesn't want to hear from me.

Now that I'm only a couple of steps behind her, I have so many things I want to just spill out, but I know I can't. I also hope that my presence doesn't make her leave. Just being around her for some time is going to be wonderful. Man, I've missed her and it doesn't help that she looks as gorgeous as she does.

I decide to catch up to her and before she can open the restaurant door for herself, I do it for her. She turns to look and I doubt she expected to see me behind her. I inhale her perfume and close my eyes momentarily, I see her red lips and I want to kiss them.

"Hey." I'm the first to speak up.

Stevie doesn't enter the restaurant, she seems frozen, so I let go of the door and mindlessly close my fingers gently around her upper arm, taking her aside.

"I was wondering if you were going to come." She finally says.

"Same here." I nod my head once, sticking my hands into my jeans pockets, otherwise, they're going to be all over Stevie. I don't think she'd like that very much. "So..."

"So." She hugs herself around the middle.

"You look fantastic." I can't help but compliment her appearance. 

Stevie smiles a little and thanks me. "How you've been doing, Linds?"

"Really shitty, not gonna lie." Don't see the point. "You?"

"It's been difficult." She nods her head, then sighs. I can tell she's struggling with something that she might want to tell me. "I've been thinking about you a lot."

It fucking hurts, hearing her say this. She left me, she was the one, who broke us up, but here she is, saying, she's been thinking about me. 

"Me too, Steph. I've missed you. I know it's been a week, but I've missed you like crazy."

I think she suddenly realizes that this could go very wrong, very fast and she begins to fidget with a pendant, hanging around her neck. 

I choose to steer the conversation in a slightly different direction. "But you're okay? Like, you have a place to live, right?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm good." She nods.

"Good." I swing back and forth on the heels of my feet, my eyes are everywhere but Stevie. "So, uh... do you think we should-" I point to the restaurant, unable to finish just in case, she doesn't think we should go in.

"Yes, I think that we should."

My heart sinks, but I don't say anything else as I follow behind Stevie for most likely the second most painful night in my life in one goddamn week.