Too Bad

drop

When I was done I opened my eyes and realized where I was. I accidentally ran into his room. Oh god. I wanted to curl up into a little ball and disintegrate into nothing.

I eventually built up the courage to walked out. He was standing right there. With a big smile on his face. He looked at me and lifted one eyebrow a little.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to go into your room. It's right next to the spare bedroom and I didn't realize until I was done. I promise I didn't make a mess." I apologized immediately.

"And you accidentally moaned my name too?" He joked.

"I-... You heard me?"

"How couldn't I? You sounded like you were having a fun time. Now how was I involved in it?"

"I can't tell you..." He put both of his hands against the wall trapping me.

"Tell me Chris. Why did you say mm y name?"

"I was imaging you touching me. And us... Touching each other in ways that I can only imagine."

He gently held my jawline. Our faces were so close together.

"Well you gotta stop thoughs thoughts." He told me. My heart shattered. "I'm 20 and you're 17. We- Well, I can get in big trouble if we end up going all the way."

"Only if people find out. Nobody has to know." I insisted.

"I'm not taking that risk. We'll do it on your birthday. I promise. Then we can be together."

I nodded my head okay. We then shared a long, tender kiss. He's such a good kisser. My knees were weak.

For the rest of the day he spoke nothing of it again. And I've been too awkward to bring it up.

A little bit after school hours ended I drove over to Mia's. I knocked on the front door and Mia opened up.

"Hey Chris! You're finally here!" She greeted. She then pulled me in. "My parents aren't home so it's just us." She then pulled me up to her room.

"Mia, I'm gonna drop the project." I told her.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that if I'm not doing this with you then you have a much better chance of not getting an F. You care about your grades much more than me."

"Why do you think I'll get an F if I'm working with you?"

"Because a lot of shit is happening in my personal life and I don't have time for this."

"What's going on? Do you wanna talk about it?"

"No. No I don't want to talk about it. Like I said, it's my personal life."

"Please Chris. I'm worried about you. You've came to school all beat up and refused to say how then ran away. And down you're staying at a friend's house? Are you and your parents fighting or something?"

"My mom died when I was 14." I corrected.

When I was 13 my brother killed himself and only a year later my mom couldn't take it anymore and took her own life too. So that's why it's just my dad and I. I always wear this leather jacket because it was Jake's; my brother's. My dad wasn't always like this. He just started being abusive once my mom died too.

"Oh my god. I'm so sorry."

"It's fine. I've learned to deal with it."

No I haven't. But I had to keep my reputation if not caring about anything and being dead inside.

"Anyway. I'm gonna go. See you tomorrow."

I got up and walked out. I drove back to Jason's. It was starting to get dark. I took a shower then went to bed.