Swimming Ducks

Part 12: Cold

Hey! This chapter contains some homophobia, so if this is going to trigger you, don't read. There is a TL; DR at the end for those who can't read it.  I am also trying to make my chapters a little longer because they are pretty short currently. Enjoy! <3

Also a note to anyone who knows me and where I live, yes, this town is loosely based off of where I live, and yes, the school is sort of our school. Not exactly, but sort of. xD

ALICE'S POV:

The ringing of my alarm bell on the 5th of January marked the first time it had ever put a smile on my face. The day was here, I finally got to see Taryn again today. We hadn't talked much after the phone call, but there was a change. We both sensed it, I know we did. The tone of our text messages, the lull in the conversation when we did eventually FaceTime. Subtle, but comfortable, excited, even. And every day my heart swelled a little more at the thought of her. Her grin, her laugh. That look in her eye when she asked me how I was, the way her eyes darted frantically when she was nervous. As silly and stupid and small as all of it was, it made everything in me swoon.

My chest was jittery with nerves as I got out of bed, running to my mirror to detangle my mane of hair. I pulled it back into two tight French braids and ran a little concealer over my spots. It felt corny as soon as I did it, but I did anyway, laughing at how silly and young I was acting. 

My outfit was a point of concern. I didn't want to appear like I was trying too hard, but I also wanted Taryn to think I looked nice. I knew it was surface level but, well, I wanted her to look at me and... like it.

Oh, fuck Alice, you're so corny.

I laughed at myself, settling on a short-sleeved button-up shirt with this colourful pattern on it, high-waisted jeans (cuffed) and a belt, with my black Doc Martens and a necklace. I spent a little too long examining myself in the mirror, making sure I looked as good as possible. Finally, I rolled my eyes at myself, pulled a couple of strands from my braids in front of my ears and rubbed my vitiligo. I sighed a little then, my mood somewhat deflating, like the growing hope in my chest had been pierced with a needle. Something in me still wished I could just rub off that patch of white, make it a little darker. Admittedly, I was already pale, but it was in the most obvious place, right in the middle of my forehead, stretching down to my nose and across my eyes. I didn't care as much as I used to. But still. I forced a smile and repeated to myself "Ouyay ancay oday isthay". I laughed at myself again. "You can do this" in Pig Latin. I knew about 6 of these little languages, but Pig Latin was the easiest. 

The car journey to school felt so long, and I could feel everything in me buzzing. I looked out of the window, watching everything roll behind me, a smile creeping constantly across my face.

"Someone is smiley today," my mum remarked. Her hair was auburn, much prettier than mine, and short, swishing just above her shoulders as her eyes turned to meet with mine. I shrugged, trying (and failing) to wipe the smile from my face. "Just, can't wait to see my friends again, I guess." I looked away as we pulled into the school parking lot, watching as Year 11 girls with skirts rolled up to the tops of their thighs formed in gaggles and scared the Year 7s who, although annoying at times, looked so small and young that I felt sorry for them. I was so glad to be in the sixth form; no more itchy polyester tights when you don't have to wear a uniform. My mum's eyes were on me, giving me a suspicious look. I could feel like giveaway blush burn across my face. 

"It's nice to see you so happy," she said finally, smiling widely. She knew. Placing one hand on mine, she squeezed it a little. "After what happened, all I want is for you to be okay."

Right. What happened, the dark cloud I placed over my family. 

I smiled back, though it wavered a little. Opening the car door, I gave her a quick "Bye mum," practically running from the car towards the school building. I felt my heart race with anticipation and butterflies flutter in my stomach.