You're Different || Jimmy Darling

Chapter 43 "We Were Nobody's..."

Hey guys! So Im gonna say sry in advance for not updating earlier like I wanted to. I was super busy this weekend and for this chapter I needed to rewatch the episode and I wasn't able to access it because of my tv provider, I forgot the password and stuff so I had to fix it and it took a while, but anyway here is the chapter hope y'all enjoy! ;)

Jimmy's POV

At this point I decided not to speak another word to Mel. I didn't want to say something else stupid to come out of my mouth and piss her off more, probably just mood swings, pregnant woman had those right?

The whole ride home Mel just held her hand on her stomach as she would stare out the window looking at the cars and trees fly by. I tried to push out all the worried thoughts in my mind. I Jimmy Darling was having twins with the love of my life. Yes I was happy there wasn't a doubt in my mind I was happy to be having children with my love but it just came at the wrong time ya know. Like if it were maybe a year or two from but now was just not a good time. With all the death, mourning, and both of our dads messing up our lives even more bringing two babies into that surely wasn't gonna be a good mix.

I just hated myself for not being able to give her the ok life I promised, to make things better. Nothing was ok lets get that straight, both of our ma's were spiraling out of control, our dad's were making our lives a living hell, to add to that we had two beautiful babies on the way, and now Mel was mad at me or at least I thought she was. So I couldn't help but ask, not seeing a smile on her face made me upset.

"Baby, are you mad at me? Ya know I'm sorry. I'm truly happy for the babies, you know that right?" I said reassuring her I actually was, I was just so flustered and stressed by everything that the happiness hadn't hit me when it should have in the hospital.

"I know Jimmy...Im sorry for snapping at you, I know you meant well by worrying about the stuff I was too afraid to even touch with a ten foot poll. If anyone I was the one being a coward not wanting to face reality, I was just so worried about the babies and all that blood and everything just made my panic level go from a 1 to a 10. I just know your gonna be a great father to our babies." She said smiling as we pulled into the our home, the freak show.

"And your gonna be an amazing mother to our children." I said smiling as I parked the car and pulled the keys out of the ignition.

Mel let her self out of my car as she stood just taking in the feeling of being home again.

"I missed this place so much! Cant wait to see the others again!" She said taking a deep breath.

"Me too." I said taking her hand in mine as we walked under the hanging lights and through the grass patches.

Finally we arrive at our trailer door and I cant wait to just jump on the bed with her and hold her in my arms as we fall asleep, its been a long day and all I wanted was to just hold her and keep her safe. But ofcourse before I could open the door I heard loud gasps from just a couple tents away.

"ETHEL!" It was Amazon. My eyes widened as I dragged Mel along with me.

I ran to the crowd of people and by all the horrified faces and gasps even the crying on some faces I had a feeling I already knew what had happened. I pushed past the crowd with Mel following right behind me.

Once I got past everyone I look to see her lifeless body on the floor of her tent. A small pistol in her hand as blood and brains scattered across the floor. My heart felt like it dropped into my stomach, like something inside me died.

"MA!" I shouted as tears I didn't even feel until now fall on my cheeks as I ran to her body. I grabbed her shaking her thinking she would somehow wake up from all of this.

"Ma! No! No! Ma! Please wake up no!" I screamed as tears streamed down my face.

"She was all I had left!" I screamed crying by her body as I looked at the gun and all the blood everywhere.

"Why! Why! Why!" I asked into thin air knowing I wouldn't get an answer back.

Apart of my heart felt like it had been ripped out, my Ma was a big part in my life, she raised me, taught me well, she was the best Ma I could ever have and now she was gone just like that. I felt numb, lifeless, I was torn. Why would Ma do this, why...?

Later That Night

After the bunch finally was able to pry me off of her body they put her in a big wooden box, since I had been by it crying almost all day. The bunch gathered together with candles Mel had handed out, she stood by my side holding a candle as we all stood next to the wooden box that was able to be buried into the ground. Elsa wasn't there but I wasn't surprised because she was so blinded with her hollywood shit and plus she didn't care about us so what would be so different about this now. Maggie wasn't there either and to be honest I'm glad she wasn't, I didn't even wanna see her face near Mel and I and the twins too. Everyone was waiting on me to say my final words so I nervously was able to spit it out.

"Flat tire. Leaky faucet. Mother could fix anything..." I paused taking a deep breath.

"She was famous for her dirty jokes...but she was a woman of culture. She loved her poetry, she used to read it to me as a kid when I was going to bed. Emily Dickson was her favorite..." I said as I started to tear up as I grabbed the rolled up piece of paper from my pocket, I started to read the poem.

"I'm nobody. Who are you? Are you a nobody too? There's a pair of us, don't tell. They banished us you know..." I said now starting to sob as I looked way from the wooden box in front of me.

"We were nobody's Ma...I'm so sorry..." I said putting my hand on my forehead as I stated to cry more and sniffle from how much I had been crying.

Mel reached out toward me blowing out her candle as she pulled me into a hug. I sobbed into her chest as she held me stroking my hair.

"It's ok baby...shhhh...I'm here for you..." She said trying to calm me from my uncontrollable sobbing. Once I was able to control my crying I threw in a rock for good luck as the others started to lower the box into the hole in the ground.

The others also threw in rocks and so did Mel, even my father threw in a rock even though I didn't show him the time of day. I didn't even look at him, I knew he was there out of respect and I really didn't have the energy to be picking a fight right now.

"Let all go get a drink." He said as he patted me on the back and we started to leave, I followed him leaving Mel and the girls there taking one last look at my mothers grave. I needed a drink, I just wanted to forget, wanted all the pain and sorrow to wash away...