The Pursuit of Happiness (Patrick Kane)

|Fifty-Six|

Kayleigh

Christmas time in the city is my favorite thing, and that's saying a lot because there's a lot of things I enjoy. But something about that first snowfall and all the Christmas lights that makes me want to smile.

After a lot of convincing I get Patrick to come Christmas shopping with me. I couldn't wait to decorate his place and make it look really good. Since both of our families were coming in town for the holidays I wanted it to look as nice as possible.

"So are you feeling more of the blue theme or a red and green? Or we can do a more non-traditional colors like a gold or purple" I say.

"I thought you didn't like Christmas" he claims as I sigh.

"I used to hate it. Back when I was in Virginia people used the Bible as some death wish to use on others. Never themselves. Lots of people use religion as an excuse for their own personal ideas. As a scare tactic whenever someone does something they don't agree with. People use the Bible to fight abortion or homosexuality but they're out here committing adultery and greed and every other deadly sin. No one sin is worse than another but people aren't ready for that conversation. They go to church on Sunday knowing they sinned yesterday and they'll do it again tomorrow. They use the Bible to bring others down but that's not the point of this religion.

Love thy neighbor and all men are created equal are similar principles. People only use them when they help them and dismiss it when it is no longer helpful. Religion isn't a question of convince. Don't just call to God when you need help then dismiss him any other time. I'm not even very religious but I do believe, I just hate that this has become something people use to scare people into conforming.

Christmas growing up was never about the magic, it was being a slave to a religion. But you can do good by his name without being a part of a cult. I love the part of Christmas that is light, celebrating the birth of a king and not hero worship" I explain.

"There's always more with you" he admits and I laugh.

"While my childhood was better than most, being so aware also has its consequences. I celebrate things they way I want to now to try and fix how I did things back then. But I'll never get my Christmases back and I'll have to live with that" I shrug.

"Maybe I can make this Christmas the best one yet" he smirks.

"I don't think it'll be too hard. My best holiday memory so far is my dads trying to decorate a Christmas tree only for the dog to knock it over. It was oddly hilarious" I admit.

"I have a good feeling not a lot will trump this one" he insists.

"I'm hoping that means you decided on a color then" I smirk.

"Is it too predictable if I say red" he jokes.

"Yes, but it gives us a lot more options" I insist.

So we get around and pick out a tree and ornaments and stockings to hang. We find cute garland to hang up around the apartment and a bunch of little things to put around the apartment.

We get to the clothing section and I find matching Christmas outfits.

"No" Patrick shakes his head. "No chance in hell."

"You don't want to be matching Santa elves with me" I pout.

"I can take the decoration, some of the Christmas music and love the food. But I'm drawing the line here" he insists.

"Ah but I'm the one who has the pencil in this relationship" I remind him.

His face falls once he realizes that one way or another, I'm getting him in that outfit. So as he lets out a sigh of defeat I toss out little matching pjs into the cart and I think we were about done.

We purchase our own winter wonderland and head back to the apartment to start putting things up. It's early December so by some people's standards we were kinda late. But neither of us work 9-5 jobs, we haven't really had time to sit there and decorate. But I made it my mission to love Christmas and I think I was well on my way.

Patrick sets up the tree while I hang up the lights and decorations. I hang out stockings up and make sure all the sweet treats were put away because Patrick would eat them all in one sitting if he didn't pace himself. Once I hide all that away I join him in putting up Christmas decorations.

"What about you? What's your favorite Christmas memory" I ask him.

He happily sighs as he shakes his head. "I have so many. Honestly I just loved it because no matter where in the world I was, I got to be home for the holidays. I remember I always woke up before my sisters. So I would run into their rooms and wake them up. They hated me for it, but as soon as they realized that Santa had come and we got to open gifts they shot out of bed. They went and woke up my parents and I went next door to grandma and grandpas. They would come over and we would spend the whole day together. I would sit in my dads lap and watch basketball. I always got new hockey stuff for Christmas and I wouldn't have it any other way" he beams.

Seeing him so happy, so child like, it warmed my heart. I'm so happy he has these memories, these little clips he can play in his head to remind him of good times.

"Why are you smiling like that" he asks.

"Hearing you talk like that, it makes me really happy. I don't need to have a good life to appreciate what memories like those mean to someone. I don't know, I just really like the fact that you act like your so over all the Christmas stuff when not so deep down you love it" I accuse.

"I do. Until you make me wear those god awful PJ's" he mumbles.

"You'll love that too" I smirk.