Me Llamo Tokio (My Name Is Tokyo) - A Money Heist Prequel

Chapter 9 - Conversations In The Dark

I take a look at the ocean one last time before getting in the car. The sun was setting, peacefully waiting for the agitated waves to take away its last rays. I can't stop myself from wondering how many days I'll have from now to just sit and carelessly watch a beautiful seascape.
"Come on." Juan says while turning on the engine. "We should leave."
I guess this is the answer and I have to get used to it, because there's not much you can do when you're running away.
Juan lets out a loud sigh in the moment when I close the door after me.
"I can't believe we're done." he says. "Let's get out of here until he'll change his mind."
"I don't think he will." I say laughing.

The meeting with Sancho's brother went out pretty good. Apparently, there was someone who was hating on Sancho worse than us. His brother, who got the nickname El Zorro* due to his red hair and probably his sneaky personality, was hunting Sancho for almost a year.
"I can't believe my ears!" he said enthusiastically. "No, please. You'll have to tell me again."
This was the second time I was telling him how I killed his brother.
"So, you just got up and said "Hey, Sancho!", unbelievable!" El Zorro bursted into laughter. "And the idiot didn't get the chance to reply?"
"No." I said looking at Juan. "I just fired the gun."
"And the bullet went right through his skull." Juan added.
El Zorro laughed. This was the only thing that I detested about this guy. There was something in his laughter that was reminding me of Sancho. I really hope this is where their similarities stop.
"And that was the first time you fired a gun?" El Zorro asked me.
"Yes." I replied hesitantly.
"Incredible!" he laughed while punching the table.
I looked down at the grilled octopus from my plate. This man made almost a banquet for us. He put Ander serve us so many dishes and wines that I've lost track. People are usually mourning when their brother dies, but this wasn't El Zorro's case and I can't blame him, Sancho was really an asshole. His death was worth celebrating. I say "cheers" in my mind, before drinking some wine in his memory. I really hope he'll rot in hell.
"Juan, you really got yourself a great girlfriend." El Zorro said.
I almost spat the wine on them, looking panicked at Juan, waiting for him to drop the bomb.
"Well..." Juan started. "I happen to be a very lucky guy."
This wasn't the bomb that I was expecting. Shocked can't even cover half of what I felt in that moment, as I swallowed the wine hardly.
"Congratulations!" said the old man while tapping Juan on the shoulder. "You are indeed lucky. I mean, look at her!"
I felt analyzed and I didn't like this. I always wanted to hide myself from the curious eyes of people like El Zorro, but there I was, in that shitty situation, just because Juan wanted to play the boyfriend.
"I know!" Juan replied and put his arm around my shoulders. "She's the best."
I had no idea how to react, but probably I should really postpone the making a scene moment for later. I just hoped that my face wasn't as confused as I was feeling in the moment when I smiled. For a second, his eyes met mine, and all I could see was a desperate attempt to tell me to play along. And so I did.

"Really, Juan?" I say rolling my eyes. "Your girlfriend?"
He keeps on driving, completely ignoring my question.
I can't deny that I've been looking at him ever since we met, how I made a ton of scenarios in my head and I was debating in my mind whether he has a girlfriend or not. I would've gladly accepted the title, but I have my honor too, and I wasn't willing to let him take over me that easily.
When he first said that to El Zorro, I was shocked and, then, I started daydreaming about us again, probably that's how I managed to fool the old man. But, this doesn't mean that Juan can do what he wants like this. And, if he really decided that, well, I need some explanations.
"Are you deaf now?" I ask irritated. "What was that entire shit show with the girlfriend?"
"I'm sorry." he whispers in the end.
"You gotta come out with something better than sorry. Why did you tell him that? Because you wanted to have fun? To show off?"
"No, Silene. Listen to me..."
"Am I your new toy now?" I scream frustrated and I feel how the tears are threatening to come out of my eyes. "That's why you agreed to take me with you? To have something to show off with?"
"For fuck's sake, Silene, would you let me finish?!" he screams and I realized that this is the first time he ever screamed at me. "That guy is a fucking pimp. If I would've told him the truth tonight you would've been in his room sucking his dick, goddamnit."
"Then why the actual fuck you haven't told me, Juan? You just take me to this trustworthy guy of yours without telling me who he is, or what we're going to do?"
"I'm sorry. I just hoped that you'll remain in the car. I wasn't planning to take you with me."
Now, I'm even more angry. How dare he? After I took care of him and helped him escape, this is the reward, to be left alone like an idiot.
"Fuck you!" I say and look away from him. "Am I a joke to you?"
"No, you don't understand." he says in a normal voice. "All I did was protect you. I just wanted to keep you out of this as much as possible. I'm sorry I haven't told you anything about this guy. I was scared you won't want to go if you'll hear that he's Sancho's brother. And, as I told you before, we really need those papers to get out of the country for a while. He was our only chance and..."
"And you thought it's best to hide from me, because you were thinking that I'll be afraid to go to him?" I cut him.
"Yes, and I'm sorry for that."
"Well, let me enlighten you, Mr Protective Boyfriend. I would've cut out El Zorro's balls if he would've dared to touch me, but not before yours for dragging me into that place first."
Juan laughs and I can't stop myself and punch him in the shoulder. 
"I deserved that." he says and I can't contradict him.
"If you would've told me I would've said: let's go. I'm not scared, Juan. Please stop projecting your own fears on me."
"I'll try." he says with a sigh. "I'm sorry."
"For what?" I ask.
"Everything." he replies, but he sees my angry gaze and immediately rephrases. "For everything that happened today."
I wonder when he'll realize that the Silene he first met that night in the hallway is dead. I'm not afraid of anything anymore.
I guess after you take a life, you start feeling like a sort of god in your own universe, ready to take another one and another one. But if I'm being honest, I wasn't feeling like this right now. Even if I managed to stop myself from feeling guilty about it, the fact that El Zorro put me to tell that story over and over again made me feel weaker. Like the locker that I used to hold the entire thing under control was being locked and unlocked too many times, making me feel like it's going to break in any moment.
We're both silent as he's driving across a lavender field. The smell of those tiny plants brings me back to my childhood. To the only nice part of it, when I was spending my summers at my grandparents, running through the lavender fields, picking up those beautiful flowers and making crowns out of them. There was a sense of freedom in those moments that I always looked for while growing up. I haven't seen a lavender field ever since I was little, and I take this as a sign that maybe, in the end, everything's going to be okay.
"How much we have left?" I ask trying to break the silence between us.
"Not much." he replies.
Since no one was looking for us yet, we both decided to politely refuse El Zorro's invitation to stay overnight at his farm and go to a motel instead. Juan told me he saw one nearby while he was driving to the farm, but I never trusted men's sense of orientation.
"Thanks." Juan says out of the blue.
"For what?" I ask surprised.
"For not making a scene with him and playing along."
I start laughing.
"Am I that bad, Juan?"
His eyes widen as he looks at me.
"A bit." he replies, showing me with his fingers the gravity of the situation. "You're not a bad person, only you're really unpredictable."
"Oh, really?" I tease him. "How's that?"
"Need I remind you that you asked me: what the fuck do you want, after I threatened you with the gun."
I burst into laughter.
"No one ever, in my entire thief career, said that to me." he's laughing too.
"Well, I'm glad I could do something to entertain you. I guess it must've been really boring." I continue.
There's no time for him to reply, as I see the huge sign indicating that we're about to reach our dream destination.